I have not had to spill any blood for my country.
Thank you for your service. I respect you for that.
When things get out of control, authority will commence.

Im still going to discipline my kids if necessary.
Some things are just necessary. When things get out of control,
Authority will commence.


I didn't drink the koolaid either.

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Originally Posted by NeedKarma

Possibly. I assumed that when getting on the high horse about parenting one was actually the primary caregiver.

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Everyone gets to have an opinion, I won't and don't let your opinion stop me from what I think is good parenting! I am a nice loving mother, just cause I gave my kid a spanking doesn't mean that I am not. It is the A-HOLES that give them all the time and go way too far, that is who we should really worry about! High horse? You must have a good view. Mr. I can't do anything wrong!

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Originally Posted by NeedKarma

Possibly. I assumed that when getting on the high horse about parenting one was actually the primary caregiver.

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I get what you are saying.
But, is a person less of a parent because he or she is a "weekend parent". Are they less of a child's parent? No. I don't think so.
And I would venture to say that not everyone that has posted on this thread has kids. So, are there opinions less valid?

And, we could possibliy be going off topic... :)

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Originally Posted by startover22

Everyone gets to have an opinion, I won't and don't let your opinion stop me from what I think is good parenting! I am a nice loving mother, just cause I gave my kid a spanking doesn't mean that I am not. It is the A-HOLES that give them all the time and go way too far, that is who we should really worry about! High horse? You must have a good view. Mr. I can't do anything wrong!

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Hmmmm... I'm not sure why you seem pissed off. Perhaps it's the use of the expression "high horse" which means " A mood or attitude of stubborn arrogance or contempt". Using that xpression has nothing to do with their opinion but with the manner it is presented. My point wasn't the fact that he's for spanking but that he tries to conver that he's a better parent because he does so but uet only sees his kid 4 days a month.

NowWhat, I'm thinking of posting in the Women's Health forum a lot, I hope that's OK, I have a lot of opinions about menstruation and how it feels. :D

/raises hand

I don't have kids.

I DO have 8 nieces and nephews, though, and countless "honorable nieces and nephews" (kids of my friends).

I was also a kid once.

And frankly, as one of those people that has to put up with OTHER peoples' kids in public--I wish people WOULD just swat their kids' rear ends in the store when they act up--or just LEAVE. One or the other. Getting subjected to someone else's kid's time out when all it consists of is having to ride in the cart (screaming at the top of his/her lungs) instead of running crazy in the store is punishment for ME.

Maybe the problem is that spankings or no spankings--too many parents don't have ANY consequences that mean anything to their kids, so of COURSE the kid walks all over them.

I'm sorry--but you can't "reason" with a 3 year old.

Go for it buddy. They may not be as nice to you there though

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Originally Posted by Synnen

Maybe the problem is that spankings or no spankings--too many parents don't have ANY consequences that mean anything to their kids, so of COURSE the kid walks all over them.

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That's the crux. Empty threats are the downfall of any attempt to discipline which can result in the parent getting angry and frustrated and hitting a child for discipline. I had to haul my kid out of the mall twice with her crying her eyes out because I said I would if she would not stop what she was doing. Haven't had to do it since.

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Originally Posted by Synnen

And frankly, as one of those people that has to put up with OTHER peoples' kids in public--I wish people WOULD just swat their kids' rear ends in the store when they act up--or just LEAVE. One or the other. Getting subjected to someone else's kid's time out when all it consists of is having to ride in the cart (screaming at the top of his/her lungs) instead of running crazy in the store is punishment for ME.

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And then someone who doesn't feel like you do calls CPS and reports they witnessed a beating, your kids get taken away, etc.

It is a bitter cycle. I have left a store before. And it was all I could do not to beat my child when we got to the car.
I have had a child screaming in a cart before. She wasn't in trouble, she was a baby and had a poop diaper on and I had a cart of groceries and was in the check out lane. But, I digress.

It just seems like parents can't win.

NK, you know I (kinda) like you, so when I said high horse I meant, it is nice to see you come down here and get yourself a drink of water! I am sticking to it is OK to give a spanking!

I know Start. Hey whatever works for you and your family. :)

The courts would not give me custody because I work and she didn't. Im the bread winner and she's a good mother so I didn't press the issue. I can only get vistiation every other weekend because I am the non custodial.

Time is NOT relevant, some can do more with little amounts of time. The judge can only be the children when they are older. So far I think I'm doing pretty good. We really do love one another and laugh more often than not.

I still don't see where spanking should be illegal. What's next, we can't yell at our kids either?

My sister has 4 girls. Her 5 year old come at her with a knife once. She got a butt whippin. Now she is maintained on Seraquel anti phycotic med. At the time I don't think she would have responded to a timeout. She was out of control. None of the others sisters have ever acted this way.

Not good practice to spank any child in public, its humiliating. Plus you really can get your kids taking off you.

The question was should it be illegal or not?

Im not saying that whipping a kid makes you a better parent. The amount of time spent is just as irrelavant. It's a parents choice to determine what is appropriate.

Some parents do not have a high tollerance no patience to use other means of correction. Some are just plain ignorant. If you got to go to jail every time you spank a child is ludicris. Can you picture Johnny no brains trying to keep his kids from beating on one another by his idea of non vilolent good parenting tactics. Hed probably offer them a beer or something. Lol



I like the one comment about 'maybe the government should step in and limit who can have kids and who cant.' Maybe we should have to take an aptitude test or something. And if you score high you obtain swatting privilages... lol


I do feel that if a child is brought up in a good home with good parents they will have more of a chance to become good parents for their kids.


My sons stepdad has whipped my son and it bothered me deeply. It was a tough situation because he was given permission by my ex-wife. I asked that it not be done again. So far so good.

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Originally Posted by Sanjay Persad

Do you think that spanking a child should be illegal?

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I am totally against spanking a child. In 22 years of parenting, with three children, I have never had to spank even once, and never would. That being said, I don't believe it should be illegal, mostly because I don't believe it's a law that could be enforced properly.

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Originally Posted by N0help4u

It may not be illegal but if some one reports it to Child protective services they most often do treat it like it is illegal and then you are put through hell over it. I know many people who are afraid to discipline their kids other than reward system because of CPS.

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Depends on the state where you live, I think. In our state, the only thing that is illegal is if you leave marks that remain for more than... I can't remember if it's fifteen or thirty minutes. And discipline means to TEACH, so there are a multitude of ways to discipline your children that don't include hitting or bribing them.

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Originally Posted by Sanjay Persad

So based on the bible, u agree with the phrase "Spare the rod and spoil the child"?

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The shepherd's rod is used to lead the sheep, to show them the right way to go. It is NOT used to hit them. So, in the proper context, I DO agree with that phrase.

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Originally Posted by startover22

So, when your child runs across the street and/or does something dangerous like that...you are gonna give him/her a time out??:rolleyes:

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No, I never used time out as a discipline tool with my children. They were never given the CHANCE to run into the street. Until they were old enough to think clearly and realize the consequences of their actions, keeping them safe from harm was my responsibility, so I kept them out of harm's way. I wouldn't have ever thought to hit them for slacking in my duty to them, which is the only thing that would have resulted in them having the opportunity to run into the street.

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Yes, I know where the non spankers are comming from, a sad state of liberal education and not enough spanking when they were a child most likely. Of course it is often there children I see destroying everything in sight as the parent ignores them and then gets upset when a stanger yells at them to behave.

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I was spanked as a child. Know what it taught me? It taught me anger, and it taught me to be more sneaky and creative. My children, who are now 22, 18 and 15, were taught proper ways to behave, and were never allowed to get by with misbehaving, in public or in private.

What the hell kind of priest are you?? I can tell you , you have turned me off priests, AND RELIGION

Tch

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Originally Posted by cut_ie

What the hell kinda priest are you???, i can tell you , you have turned me off priests, AND RELIGION
tch

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And you haven't even seen the homophobia yet. :D

If the government can tell me how to raise my kids, then they can feed , cloth, and house them too!

Love your children. Love someone else's if you can. Don't hurt them, just love them best you can. If you see abuse report it. That is what us adults are here for. Protecting them, they can't protect themselves, so moms, dads, granparents, brothers, sisters, and friends, stand up and help, don't just sit back and watch! I think that is what really needs to be said, cause I can bet one out of ten (maybe less) of you have been involved in some sort of abuse that could have been prevented if someone would have stood up and taken action!

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Originally Posted by startover22

Love your children. Love someone elses if you can. Dont hurt them, just love em best you can. If you see abuse report it. That is what us adults are here for. Protecting them, they can't protect themselves, so moms, dads, granparents, brothers, sisters, and friends, stand up and help, don't just sit back and watch!! I think that is what really needs to be said, cause I can bet one outta ten (maybe less) of you have been involved in some sort of abuse that could have been prevented if someone would have stood up and taken action!

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Start--while I agree that ABUSE should be reported---swatting a kid on his butt isn't abuse.

Abuse is backhanding the kid across the room.

A bit of a difference, hmmm?

Really--the biggest difference between a spanking and abuse is that a spanking is done to correct a child. Abuse is to vent your own anger.

Sadly, most states have laws that as long as you don't leave bruises while beating your child, it's not abuse. Also, if the bruises you leave behind are not totally conclusive, they will not be acknowleged. My husband ex-wife, and her new husband, regularly beat the living tar out of our youngest son, who as ADHD and ADD. We even had them in court for that... but the judge said, no no... send them back to these people, and tell them not to leave bruises.
So, spanking... ONLY for a small child, for safety violations (such as running out on to the road etc) never more then 3 light blows, on the behind only, and only with your bare hands. Usually that will get the point of "Hey, if I do that again, it's really going to hurt" across.

There is no need to spank a child. A bully. Picture yourself in prison and a guy bigger than you starts to take advantage of you. If the man can build nuclear powered aircraft carriers then there is another way to treat a child