Originally Posted by jrebel7
DazT, sounds like you are having a strong case of "separation anxiety". When you had access to her number, you had one set of emotions to deal with but knowing you don't know her number, it sets up another set of emotions to deal with.
It all goes back to acceptance that this is over...........whether you have her number or not. I do not take "separation anxiety" lightly. I am no expert about it other then my own experience.....have no real knowledge of it..........If I lose a pencil, I can get "separation anxiety", well of course, that is a bit of an exaggeration but just meaning it isn't so much what I lose, it is the absence of something that was in my life and now is gone or lost.
I always have to get a mindset in loss. I am so sorry you woke up feeling so badly. Her texting you and then finding she had changed her number spun you around. You can always find a way to contact her so I don't that that is so much the issue. Did you respond to her text? If not, you are one step closer to your new future.
Personally, I don't understand why she would want you and her to both change your numbers. I would not change mine just to help her not contact, that just means all your friends would have to be notified, businesses notified, dental and doctor offices, etc.
It sounds like to me, you have been doing fairly well in NC and this is just a bump in the road leading to a better future. If she texts again, write down the number but I would not text back. That way, you can put the number away and sort of relax about the "separation anxiety".
I think the issue of "separation anxiety" has something to do with us feeling we have no control so we must take steps to control what we can, and what we can't, let it go.
I know "Easier said than done". You are doing good, better than you even know. Best to you! Moving on is difficult as everyone on this thread will attest to. But the longer you go without contact the easier it becomes.
