We don't know your father! He could take away your school tuition and keep you from seeing your cousin. He could demand an arranged marriage. He could decide to move to Canada sooner.
I don't think everyone here realizes the culture you live in. Young adult children, especially women, can't just refuse their parents wishes as easily as they can in the US, Canada, Europe.

That is true she may not have any hope of doing what she wants. I do hope that she finds a solution that fills her dreams

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Originally Posted by joypulv

We don't know your father! He could take away your school tuition and keep you from seeing your cousin. He could demand an arranged marriage. He could decide to move to Canada sooner.
I don't think everyone here realizes the culture you live in. Young adult children, especially women, can't just refuse their parents wishes as easily as they can in the US, Canada, Europe.

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I can't even think of what my father believes in.. Like does he is in favour of this culture thing or not... well I'm pakistani not all people here is in favour of this thing except when it comes to lower class. What I have seen in some situations my father's opinion is that 'one should get to know each other first and there is no issue if someone loves other' but as for me he talked to my mom saying that I wll ask my daughter what is her choice etc. :s he is a confuse person for me or maybe I'm a confused nature.
I think I should get a chance to talk to my dad about this before it gets late. I should start from what he wants me to be.

OK, you know him better than we do (which is not at all), so if we are sort of a sounding board to bounce your thoughts off, that's good. If now's the time to talk to him, then take the plunge. Maybe talking to your mother first, the same day, might help? Ask her if they had a love marriage or was it arranged?
All parents, even in the US, who say they believe in choice and love in marriage will still show disapproval if they don't approve. They can't help it - you've been their child for so long.
I would concentrate on the job prospects as much as how much you love him. Tell him the world has changed a lot since he was 20, and anyone can succeed in business. His grandchildren will get good schooling too, and also do well, and he can be proud. Parents usually can't resist hearing about grandchildren.

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Originally Posted by joypulv

OK, you know him better than we do (which is not at all), so if we are sort of a sounding board to bounce your thoughts off of, that's good. If now's the time to talk to him, then take the plunge. Maybe talking to your mother first, the same day, might help? Ask her if they had a love marriage or was it arranged?
All parents, even in the US, who say they believe in choice and love in marriage will still show disapproval if they don't approve. They can't help it - you've been their child for so long.
I would concentrate on the job prospects as much as how much you love him. Tell him the world has changed a lot since he was 20, and anyone can succeed in business. His grandchildren will get good schooling too, and also do well, and he can be proud. Parents usually can't resist hearing about grandchildren.

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Talking to my mom is no use,I already had a discussion with her about this. I tried to explain her that arranged marrige like theirs have no guarantee wheather they work out or not.since me and my cousin know each other so good we are even aware of the problems in our families, I told her they give me so much of importance they listen to me intheir difficult times they know I'm right. IN SHORT , its completely no use of talking to her.
This is right , I should speak to my dad about the career/business thing he may understand

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Originally Posted by N0help4u

That is true she may not have any hope of doing what she wants. I do hope that she finds a solution that fills her dreams

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I hope I do :(