Vitamins are fine as long as they aren't megadoses.
Birth control is a bit iffy, but better to stay on it.

Wellbutrin is an antidepressant. These can be enormously helpful for some people. I know two people who take them and they really help. My sister takes prozac and a friend takes Effexor, which helps him with social anxiety. Now he says it's easy for him to go up to strangers and just start talking. He likes that.

The only problem with antidepressants is that in a few people they actually trigger suicidal thoughts and suicide, which is the last thing you need. Each kind has different side effects. Some will help you sleep. Some will keep you awake. You kind of have to find one that works for you but I think KISS might be right that one of these might help you a lot. I hadn't thought of that, but you sound like a prime candidate.

You asked how Wellbutrin and other antidepressants work:

CORRECTION: Wellbutrin works differently.

Nobody completely understands how antidepressants work. A lot of doctors and other people will tell you that they "correct an chemical imbalance" but in fact nobody knows what imbalance they correct, if any.

There are molecules that help your brain cells talk to each other called neurotransmitters. One of them is serotonin. Most modern antidepressants make sure there is more serotonin available in the space between brain cells so they can send signals to one another. The thing is, though, that the antidepressant causes an increase in serotonin right away, soon after you take it, but most people don't feel better for several weeks, so it's not just the serotonin that's making them feel better.

What probably happens is that more brain cell connections form--they can measure the increase in neural connections. And THAT correlates with people feeling better. But the exact nature of those connections and how the antidepressant makes it happen is still not understood as far as I know.

Welbutrin is not of the SSRI (Selective Seretonin Reuptake Inhibitor) or trycyclic class. It's a member of the aminoketone class.

It would be great if it worked for me. I'd like a quick fix. At the same time, it would be nice if I didn't need any medications.

I don't know why it is so hard for me to go and talk to a therapist. Maybe tomorrow I will see if I can find the place at least and walk by... ugh.

I feel a lot better now that I have been talking to everyone on here. Especially you, asking. I told my closest and oldest friend what I did because she has had similar, though not as close or as violent, experiences with cutting and near.. dying experiences (she never actually took the pills, thankfully, and she stopped hurting herself). She said it scared her and to call her next time, but I told her I'm okay now and not to worry. I just feel kind of weird about it..

What's the difference between SSRI and aminoketone?

I'm going to sleep now. Hopefully my body will feel better in the morning.
Thank you all so much. Talking helps me not think.

I can't sleep. I'm so angry. My stupid roommate came in from a party, turned on every freaking light, and got on skype. Then she had her trashy friend in her and they made popcorn. They were laughing and shhing each other because I got pissed and made it clear this was not okay. I told her, I'm awake, stop talking about me like I'm not here. I really do hate people. Is it so unreasonable to want to sleep at 1:30am? I really want to do something destructive to her stuff right now, but I will try to wait and yell at her when she gets back. In the mean time, how am I supposed to sleep? This is frustrating right now..

*Nevermind. I'll take sudafed and yell at her in the morning..

I feel so hopeless..

If I drop out, everyone will be disappointed in me. My friends will ostracize me because they are all overachievers and like college and would think I was such a quitter. My family paid good money for me to be here and on all my supplies. People gave me graduation money. They took stock in me, so much is riding on me.

I would go back to my little city in New York, six miles outside the city at that, and live in my room. All my friends would be in college, making something of themselves. I'd spend the majority of my time alone and online or sleeping. I'd have no way to get anywhere because my parents would need the cars. If I could find a job, it would be at McDonald's. I'd never leave the city because there is no opportunity, and I'd probably end up killing myself.

If I stay, I'm probably just delaying the inevitable. I'm not social, I'm not okay, and I just don't care already. It's noon, I have class at 1:30pm, and I just want to sleep and cry. I could change roommates, but that would involve me probably moving all my stuff. Then my snarky roommate would probably tell everyone I'm antisocial and don't like fun, and I'd get a reputation as old and a jerk.

She came in drunk and stoned last night. She turned on ever light, made popcorn, had some girl in here, and laughed uncontrollably. She was loud and disrespectful. I told her this morning that I don't care what she does outside the room, I don't care if she gets sh*tfaced every night, but when she is in here, she needs to have respect. I told her that things she can do in her room at home are not acceptable with other people and that it's not unreasonable for someone to want to sleep at 1:30am. I told her that maybe I want to get up in the morning and do things. I said maybe we needed quiet hours (11pm-7am, I was thinking). I told her I didn't care if she got on skype if she didn't turn on every light and be loud, but clearly she can't be quiet.

She told me that she can't do that. She said this is college and Thursday night is a weekend. She said she was like that because she was so "lifted" (drunk/stoned). She said she is a loud person and can't be quiet, even from 11-7am. (She's 17, she'll be 18 in a month.) She suggested we switch roommates because she has a friend who hates her roommate (not that she doesn't like me, of course) who is ROTC and very down to earth.

I could move in with my gram and maybe get a jon, but my grandparents are on fixed income. I feel like everyone was so excited and invested in me. I feel stupid for thinking change would do me good and like a failure for giving in so soon. I feel like my family saw this coming, because I was never a fan of high school, and will be so disappointed in me. I don't want to face them.

The thing is, if I drop out now, then I won't be charged for anything. If I hold out, even a week, I will. I could go online, I'd do that, but I'd still feel like I let everyone down, including myself.

Plus I don't want to do the walk of shame and move everything out after only a week. I hate this so much..

I'll bet money that you're a perfect candidate for Wellbutrin SR.

My fried could also write like you. Extremely well. So many things fit. If you also have anxiety problems, such as least night, meds such as Ativan could help. It's such a touchy situation because anti-depresents can increase suicide risk, but can also reduce it. I'd say the same for Ativan under the right situations. I personaly know the effects of both of these meds. so I'm not barking up a tree. Attivan is typically designed for transient use. Say six months of grieving or something.
I do wish you had a good doctor that would trust you.

I take Ativan for two reasons. My elderly mother gets out of hand (anti-anxiety) and when I can't sleep because of a migraine. I can't take the stuff during the day. Probably could if I cut the dosage. If you give it 8-10 hours of time before you have to get up, I'm fine. You don't feellike you were drugged to fall asleep. It just reduces the anxiety, so you can fall asleep.


Yea, there are unresonable people in the world and I don't think it's your fault. If compromises can't be worked out, then you need to change your surroundings.

I'm withdrawing. I'm going to go live with my gram. My parents are coming down to move me out tomorrow. I just feel like such a failure and a burden. I'm not even sure I can face my family after this. My gram keeps saying "we will work it out" and insists she's okay with me moving in, but I don't buy it. I just feel lost and stuck and hopeless and I don't know where to go from here..

Get your A$$ to the doctor ASAP. I don't want to hear it that your withdrawing.

Make an appointment with a psychiatrist, NOW!

It will be money wel spent. Trust me.

You can use:

Im starting school soon and am having trouble coping and staying focused. Some of my symptoms are:

List

It's been suggested that Wellbutrin might be able to help me. What do you think? Would you be wiling to allow me a trial?

If your asked who, just say an online community.

You withdrawing is stupid. Fix the problem.

Tel you what. Instead of withdrawing, change your course load to something that you can pass with ease. Coledge programs are desiged to eliminate people. Don't let them do that.

College is "get good grades" Nothing else matters.

When I leared how to go to college, I became a ghost in a classes, I was told in one class If you have something better to do, don't bother coming to class". I tested out of classes. I had my grade changed from a B to an A all because of a couple of points. I was told that I didn't have to come to the last 2 or 3 classes because I did so well and I was having dental surgery.
I challenged teachers and won. Its a game. Play to win!

I've already missed three classes now, and my head is killing me. It's basically been arranged. I can still go online and work. Hopefully my grandparents were sincere in taking me, because then I could work a lot and hopefully move out fast. I don't want to burden them at all, just I know I'd be more likely to live on my own sooner if I could live with them in the city. I'm talking to my friends and family and they just keep saying it's my decision and they hope I don't have regrets. It just makes me feel even worse. It's the people I have problems with, and myself, not the campus or set up or classes.

I could be okay with this if I didn't have to worry about letting everyone down and being judged..

Quote:

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Originally Posted by give2me1lemons

I'm withdrawing. I'm going to go live with my gram. My parents are coming down to move me out tomorrow. I just feel like such a failure and a burden. I'm not even sure I can face my family after this. My gram keeps saying "we will work it out" and insists she's okay with me moving in, but I don't buy it. I just feel lost and stuck and hopeless and I don't know where to go from here..

---

I'm actually happy to hear this. I think you'll do better in college when you are more ready. I am confident you'll be able to go another time.

Look, I dropped out of college after two years because I was depressed and confused and I went back after a year and did much better. Now I'm the author of a college textbook that has won awards.

What you are going through is a TEMPORARY setback. If you broke your leg or something you wouldn't be beating on yourself for not being up to what some other people are able to do. Right now, you are dealing with pretty serious anxiety and depression. It's okay for people to have problems and be taken care of. Let your gram take care of you. Enjoy it! I'm really glad to know she's there for you.

You both deserve and need the care of others right now.

A friend of mine once gave me a "prescription" for Entitlement. He actually wrote it out on a piece of paper and said take some twice a day.

So I'm writing you a prescription for some, too. You are entitled to take a break, entitled to be cared for and loved, entitled to receive help, entitled to take your time, and entitled to be you.

Have you made that appointment yet? Tell them its an emergency. Use the colledge infirmary for referrals.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by give2me1lemons

I've already missed three classes now, and my head is killing me. It's basically been arranged. I can still go online and work. Hopefully my grandparents were sincere in taking me, because then I could work a lot and hopefully move out fast. I don't want to burden them at all, just I know I'd be more likely to live on my own sooner if I could live with them in the city. I'm talking to my friends and family and they just keep saying it's my decision and they hope I don't have regrets. It just makes me feel even worse. It's the people I have problems with, and myself, not the campus or set up or classes.

I could be okay with this if I didn't have to worry about letting everyone down and being judged..

---

Lemons, I think you are right that you aren't ready to be in college right now. And you are getting away from that dreadful roommate, too! I think it's fine to change your mind and take some time off. You can always go back later. I have several friends whose kids started college and then came home because they were so unhappy. What you are doing is actually pretty common.

Don't worry about regrets. You are making a good decision for right now. It's easy to second guess yourself later, but there's no need.

But don't give up on college altogether. There are other ways to do it. Just think about it later. You'll know when you are ready. As you say, you can go part time, take classes in the City, etc.

I wish you would not worry about burdening your family. You've said you've been supportive of others in the past. It's your turn to be a "burden." People actually like taking care of others. In fact, people who have a child or partner or a pet to take care of actually live longer than people who are all alone. Let them help you. Helping family is a joy.

It's weird how things happen. I hope I'm making the right decision, but I'm so afraid of tomorrow and hope I don't burden my gram. If it becomes apparent that they are disappointed in me and not happy with me, I'll leave them too. This is all so awkward and difficult.

My head feels awful, and I can't take tylenol. I don't know if it's because I took equate nighttime to sleep or because I'm so upset or what. I'm still so paranoid about overdosing the other night.

And this guy I used to be really close with but never talk to anymore reached out to me and made an effort to cheer me up and make sure I'm okay. He's the only person I know not making me feel horrible for doing this. The others are doing so unintentionally, but still..

I'm just so afraid of what everyone will think of me, and I'm afraid of them realizing how messed up I feel right now. I hope I can pull things together fast. I just wish people would outright accept and support my decision, but I know it doesn't work that way..

The people who are surprised by your decision will get over it. You are not living their life; you are living your own.

Good about the guy!

About your headache, it's hard to know why, but you are really stressed and you did a number on your body the other night. I'd tell you to go to the doctor, but I guess I'm thinking you won't go... If you start to feel worse, then get to a clinic or ER. What is equate?

PS. I'm probably going to be gone most of this weekend, leaving later today. Will check to see if you are still posting on Sunday night...

I'm being told everything from I'm fing up to they completely understand. I'm second guessing myself so bad, and I feel like crap I don't know what to do anymore..


Equate is for colds and fevers and pain. Gel capsules.

Right.. That's why you need Welbutrin. It will help you think clearer. That's what the problem is.

I can't stand this feeling. I feel like I can do no right and make no one happy. I don't want to be me. I don't want to be anything. I feel like I've fed everything up and it's too late. I don't even know how to live with myself and my decisions.

Do the doctor route please. My friend said that he had gone to numerous doctors and none could help him and I came along and suggested the drug Welbutrin and within 3 days he felt enormously better. Usually it's a lot longer to feel better.

You will feel better. The first step is getting there. I don't know any of your friends to tell them to drag you there. You need to go, and soon.