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posey_84 · Feb 16, 2009, 07:42 AM

Do u think its possible to be in love with two different people?

I really would welcome any advice on this subject at all especially from anyone who's been in this position as I'm in a bit of a pickle! Thank You xx

kctiger · Feb 16, 2009, 07:44 AM

I tend to think it is usually a case of infatuation. I would find it hard to fall in love with two different people, as it usually requires a lot of time being spent with one individual person. In most cases, you are in love with one person, and perhaps infatuated by another...

posey_84 · Feb 16, 2009, 07:46 AM

I hear what your saying but I honestly don't think it is I've known one of them for 6 years and one of them for 8 years and I'm totally torn.

Justwantfair · Feb 16, 2009, 07:49 AM

Originally Posted by posey_84

i hear what ur saying but i honestly dont think it is iv known one of them for 6 years and one of them for 8 years and im totally torn.

You posed the question is it possible, but you apparently feel that you are in love with two people, knowing whether anyone else believes it is possible is not going to help you out of your pickle.

neverme · Feb 16, 2009, 07:51 AM

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

You posed the question is it possible, but you apparently feel that you are in love with two people, knowing whether anyone else believes it is possible is not going to help you out of your pickle.

Yep!

posey_84 · Feb 16, 2009, 07:53 AM

I don't know though if I am in love with both or even one of them or if I just think I am.

kctiger · Feb 16, 2009, 07:54 AM

I am also a stern believer that YOU WOULD KNOW if you are in love with someone... when it comes to a question of it, it is usually not strong enough to be love, thus called infatuation.

zeeniee · Feb 16, 2009, 07:55 AM

Perhaps you should explain your situation and tell your story which would help us understand what is going on...

posey_84 · Feb 16, 2009, 07:56 AM

OK but please don't judge me because I feel really awful right now

neverme · Feb 16, 2009, 07:57 AM

Ya I'm with kc here, it's probably just infatuation.

At any rate, how can we help you if you don't explain your story?

zeeniee · Feb 16, 2009, 07:59 AM

Well what ever the situation is I am sure you will get very sound advice from this site- which may help you make the right choice

posey_84 · Feb 16, 2009, 08:01 AM

OK well call them guy A and guy B. I met guy A 8 years ago whilst studying for my A levels and we were very attracted to one another and fooled around abit but never slept together. He tried plenty but I never did as I knew he was 17 and just trying to sleep with anyone and I would end up getting hurt because I wanted more. Anyway we remained friends over the years and two years later I met guy B I was at a really bad time in my life and very low with nowhere to live so kind of clung onto him like my knight in shining armour type thing...

Justwantfair · Feb 16, 2009, 08:05 AM

Ok and there must still be more... and that is what?

zeeniee · Feb 16, 2009, 08:06 AM

So what happened?? Must be more to the story...

posey_84 · Feb 16, 2009, 08:06 AM

... over the years I've seen guy A but just in a friendly way as we have the same group of friends although feelings have always been there. Anyway guy B and I are now married and everything was fine as guy A had gone off to fight in the war in Iraq and I pushed him to the bak of my mind. But then two weeks ago I bumped into him when he was on two weeks leave and he's like a different guy. He was genuinly gutted that I was married but congratulated me anyway. After a few drinks he told me he totally regretted not acting sooner and just took for granted that we would always egt together in the end.

Justwantfair · Feb 16, 2009, 08:08 AM

Guy B, you are married to him.

zeeniee · Feb 16, 2009, 08:10 AM

I would focus on your husband and the life and future you have with him- and accept that guy A is a nice person- but you choose guy B.

posey_84 · Feb 16, 2009, 08:10 AM

Yes I am and have always been faithful which is why I feel so awful having these feelings for someone else

Justwantfair · Feb 16, 2009, 08:13 AM

There isn't anything you can do about your feelings for someone else, except cut them out of your life so that your mind can focus on your husband. This is difficult but definitely the better choice.

zeeniee · Feb 16, 2009, 08:13 AM

Best to create a distance between you and Guy A- you managed to put him back of your mind once and so I am sure you can do this again.