Recently found out after 22 years, husband had affair with best friend's wife.
Hi All -
I've been married for 19 years, together for 22. He was 29 and I was 26 when we got together. Last year in the basement I stumbled upon my husband's old journals in an old gym bag. I pulled out a envelope with pictures of my husband and his best friend's wife (who were separated at the time) with whom he had an affair with about a year prior to meeting me. He had journals describing in great detail their physical relationship/poems written for her, etc. They only saw each other 4-5x in a 9 month period as they lived in other states. I was shocked he would do that to his friend, but he was young (27) and we all do things we regret later. As well, married people don't necessarily share everything about their past. It was before me and it was something he says he is deeply ashamed of.
Anyway, back to the pictures. They are pictures of a weekend tryst in San Francisco. Mostly pictures of them in various touristy places in SF. There were also 2 pictures sexy pictures of her in a "teddie" laying on the unmade bed in the hotel.
I guess my question is... why would a guy keep pictures/journals about a relationship he states wished never happened and makes him sick to his stomach when he thinks of it (he lost a very good friend as a result of this). My husband said when going through junk he looked at them a handful of times since we have been together. Said he did not know why he kept them.
Any insight would be appreciated. Just trying to understand how a man's mind works. Had it been me, everything would have been thrown out years ago.