So you only asked us to put your mind at ease about this marriage? I don't see how any of us can do that seeing as you don't want this marriage and you're only getting married to please everyone else.
|
So you only asked us to put your mind at ease about this marriage? I don't see how any of us can do that seeing as you don't want this marriage and you're only getting married to please everyone else.
I see years of unhappiness in her future...Quote:
Originally Posted by Alty
Many many years, since she'll likely stay in the marriage for the same reason she got into it, to make everyone else happy.Quote:
Originally Posted by smoothy
It's much easier to break off an engagement and cancel a wedding, than it is to break up a marriage, especially once children enter the mix.
Tell your family that you have very bad feelings about this marriage and want to call it off, and then call your fiancé and tell him, "I am very sorry but I cannot marry you. I wish you well but we have not been getting along and it is clear to me we are not compatible. I also plan to continue in school and also to have a career. I know this is not what your family or you want in your wife, so I think it's best to just tell you, that's my plan."
Are you in the US? Europe? I know that women are considered their father's property in some parts of the world until they marry and become their spouse's property. Is that your situation? If you are in a Western country, you risk disapproval from your family but you will probably have to face that to have the life you want anyway - might as well face up to it now. When you succeed, your family will get over their disappointment in the marriage, and will be pleased when you find a good man on your own who supports your educational and career goals. And if you are in a Western country, you have every right to refuse to marry someone.
If you are somewhere that you do not have such rights, you need to convince your parents this is a bad marriage, and try to get out of your country and go where you will have more freedoms and opportunities such as Europe or the US.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dontknownuthin
ThanQ for giving me such a wonderful idea...
If it were me, I will stop the wedding. 16 days before I was to get married, I stepped away and frankly I could careless about all involved, this was my life. I had a nagging knot in my stomach for over one year that I could no longer ignore, and yes I walked away. When I gave back my rings it was the best decision I ever made. My former fiancé and I still talk but I am so relieved. When in doubt, do without. Do not get married!
Where are you? Perhaps you could go to a Western Embassy and ask for asylum. Tell them you are being forced into an unwanted marriage and ask if they will send you to their country for protection.Quote:
Originally Posted by 841992
I doubt they would care as she isn't truly being forced. If you read it, she says her family is wanting her to do it... she can back out of it, she is just afraid to do so.Quote:
Originally Posted by dontknownuthin
Maybe if you explained what you mean by 'compulsion marriage' and where you live, it would help us give you advice you can use.
You should confirm about your studies and job before engagement; if he again start talking with you nicely and takes care of you then proceed with him as his parents are good.
| All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:30 PM. |