What's... going on in here?!
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What's... going on in here?!
Hey sneezy... you'll have to ask these crazy girls :D
I'm soooo sorry, but Duckman make me do it! ;)
YouTube - Queer Duck
Hey friend! Duck... mj... what?!
Oh, just wanted to brag...
Pictures from my new apartment:
Attachment 9834
Attachment 9835
I'm pretty confused too Sneezy. It just gets more and more random with every visit. You'd have to move in permaently to ever fully understand what goes down in this crazy castle.
They're eating dancing ducks or something. :P
Niiiice! I love the courtyard! I would be spending a whole lot ot time out there Sneezy!
Alty, it says your new thread was discontinued...
Night all, maybe one night I can get some decent sleep...
They are trying to B'BQ me Kal... heeeelllppp me! We can take them on! Uhmmm... we can right?Quote:
Originally Posted by KalFour
Does it really? Holy cow! Why? She was asking for advice?!Quote:
Originally Posted by Stringer
G'nite String Man... get a good sleep! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!
I tried to click on her thread from her post here and it said that it "wasn't available.":confused:Quote:
Originally Posted by starbuck8
Maybe the reputation of you two has preceded you... Mmmmmmaaaaaaaaahahah... sorry very tired, no handcuffs pleaseeeee. I have DUCK... yep a duck leg.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stringer
Yes, you're right... it's gone! I don't understand the politics here I guess. I don't think that was fair. She honestly wanted opinions. She wasn't trying to start an argument and she deliberately left out names to protect who the message was from. I guess we really have to mind our P's and Q's, even though we are on here to try and give rational and helpful advice to those that are in need of it. Although it might not always be helpful, or taken, I thought this was a site for help and differing opinions!
EDIT: And I assumed member discusions was just that... discusions!
Hey Stringer... I can wiggle through handcuffs! Give me my leg back... thankyou my dear! :D
Wow Sneezy! That looks luxurious!
And no eating Starby! Also, I doubt you can find handcuffs small enough to fit a duck. :P
Quote:
Originally Posted by KalFour
My bad. These would probably work:
I wiggled out Kal... I've got the perps tied up in the west wing in the dungeon now! They won't be able to DUCK out... they need to SIMMER down! ;)
Well the Block is coming from the fact that I really have no plot, And oatmeal cookies can be evil, since they are oatmealish.. they should be healthy but since their in a cookie their not..Quote:
Originally Posted by Altenweg
Idk where I'm going with it yet, But I'm going to acutally put a serious effort into it. Its just something to do While I waste away Summer or I get a call a call back for hopefully a jOb interview
Well seeing as the theme for the day is "Ducks" why not a duck joke...
A woman brought a very limp duck to the veterinarian's office. As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet duck Cuddles has passed away."
The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied.
"How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever.
As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the lab and led it out of the exam room. He returned a few moments later with a cat.
The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. She screamed, "$150.00!" "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"
The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150.00."
Boooooo... ohhh... booooo... LMAO! Get back to the dungeon Duckman! LOL!
EDIT: Pretty Fireworks! I'll be baaaccckkk!
A woman walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey where'd you get the pig?"
The women says "This isn't a pig it's a duck"
And the bartender says "No, I was talking to the duck!"
Ooooh, M, that was so bad that I actually laughed. :)
So my thread is gone, I'm not surprised. I took out the names of the people involved, with exception to me, so really, I was the only one who could have been hurt by posting that thread. I just wanted to know what I had said wrong, what I could have said that was so obviously misread. I guess I'm not allowed to ask for opinions or advice. Okay, yes, a bit mad.
Other people on this site (no names, and watch, this post will be deleted) have started threads about PM's that people have sent them, and they did not delete the name of the person, those threads are still active, the fighting is going on and on and on, and they haven't been deleted. Are there different rules for different people, or am I being paranoid? Just because your paranoid doesn't mean they aren't really out to get you. ;)
Should I start a thread asking what was wrong with my thread?
Quote:
Originally Posted by friend4u178
"Point of no return", I love that movie. ;)
Okay, bad joke;
A man walks into a bar with an alligator. The bartender says "Sir, I'm sorry, but that alligator can't stay."
The man says, "This alligator is friendly, honestly, it wouldn't hurt a fly, let me show you."
The man pull down his pants, puts his, shall we say "privates" into the alligators mouth, shuts the alligators mouth and starts hitting it on the head with a stick. He opens the alligators mouth and voilą, everything is fine and still where it should be.
He says to the crowd, "Does anyone else want to try this?"
A little old lady puts her hand up and says, "I do, but don't be beating me on the head with no stick." ;)
I'm the ghost.
Having been in a few online fights and with a few post removed, my advice is.. you got your point(very effectivley) across just let it drop.
I tend to agree , I come on here to give advise where I can and have fun interacting with all you guys. If I came on here and got upset with anyone I wouldn't even bother to be honest. Your just fueling his/her ego by continuing on with it.Quote:
Originally Posted by bushg
Quote:
Originally Posted by Altenweg
LMAO... now that's funny :)
I will drop it, because obviously I'm not going to get anywhere this way. I really wasn't trying to get my point across, I really just wanted to know what I said that would warrant that type of response. I don't know, and I guess I never will.Quote:
Originally Posted by bushg
I admit that I can be pig-headed, and when I get angry I don't back down. That may have something to do with being beaten down one time too many long ago. I will not stand by and let someone be rude or ignorant at someone else's expense. If I'm wrong I'll admit it, I guess I expect the same of others, maybe I expect too much.
Sorry guys, honestly, I won't talk about it anymore, just had to get that off my chest. I'm mad about this, because it really doesn't seem fair to me, but what do I know?
Maybe I should take a break from AMHD, maybe it's time to throw in the towel.
Not while I'm still around... we all lub you too much Alty :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Altenweg
Quote:
Originally Posted by friend4u178
Dangit, you're right M, as always (don't let that comment go to your head).;)
As for leaving, that was a bad Alty moment. I need to make an effort to stay away from this person, far, far away. I won't engage in any more "conversations" with this person, in fact, this person doesn't exist, at least not to me. I'll do what I do, and talk to all of you. You guys mean too much to me for me to just give up. Have I told you all that lately?
The fact that I really, really think of you all as friends, well that's pretty amazing. I never thought I'd have friends that I met on the internet, not in a million years. I mean, it's the internet, you hear all sorts of bad things, but having met all of you, getting to know all of you, well, there's nothing bad about that. I adore all of you, I really do, you are friends, true friends, I hope you all know that.
Great, now I'm crying. What the heck is wrong with me? :o
Right back at you M, right back at you. :)Quote:
Originally Posted by friend4u178
Don't leave us Alty!
Without having actually read this thread, I'm going to take a stab in the dark and suggest that you said something a little too blunty for certain hyper-sensitive members.
The reason YOUR post got deleted while others haven't, is probably because such people decided it was inappropriate and said so.
Thanks Kal.Quote:
Originally Posted by KalFour
I had a moment, it's passed, I'm okay now.
Blunt is my middle name. ;)
Okay, no more. I'm done. Happy castle talk now. No more crap I can't do anything about. Thanks for setting me straight guys, I needed that swift kick in the butt. ;):)
Jokes, jokes, must tell jokes;
Okay, another bad one, and don't be mad;
Q: Why did the rubber fly across the room?
A: It was pissed off. :p
I told you it was bad. :o
Oh you cry baby :) Here have a tissue...Quote:
Originally Posted by Altenweg
Attachment 9838
Ok so now...
Attachment 9839
Lol. That's awful!Quote:
Originally Posted by Altenweg
And I totally failed to get it the first time I read it... that's even more awful!
If we're into lame jokes...
Q. How many elephants can you fit in a mini?
A. 4. Two in the front and 2 in the back.
Q. How can you tell if an elephant's beewn in your fridge?
A. There are footprints in the butter.
Q.How can you tell if two elephants have been in your fridge?
A. Two set of footprints in the butter.
Q.How can you tell if three elephants have been in your fridge?
A. Three set of footprints in the butter.
Q.How can you tell if four elephants have been in your fridge?
A. There's a mini parked out the front.
M, Kal, thanks, I needed that. :)
If it weren't for all of you, I'd be gone, I really would. Thank God for you guys. :)
::tear:: M, pass the tissue. ;)
Kal... oh Kal , now they are bad LOL. Here are some more bad ones , I've posted these before but you may not have seen them :)
I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah, I thought
"he's trying to pull a fast one".
So I said to this train driver "I want to go to
Paris".
He said "Eurostar?" I said "I've been on telly but I'm
no Dean Martin".
So I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to
do the splits?"
He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays".
So I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (former World Chess champion) and there
Was a check tablecloth.
It took him two hours to pass me the salt. He said,
"You remind me of a pepper-pot", I said "I'll take
that as a condiment".
Do you know I've got a friend who's fallen in love
With two schoolbags, he's bisatchel?
But I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can
Hardly contain myself.
Now you know those trick candles that you blow out and
A couple of seconds later they come alight again, well
The other day there was a fire at the factory that
Makes them.
So I said, "Do you want a game of Darts?" he said "OK
then", I said, "Nearest to bull starts". He said
"Baa", I said "Moo", he said, "You're closest".
You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt
Saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox.
The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of
Snow. I rang her up, I said, "Do you get my drift?"
So I went down the local supermarket, I said "I want
to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",
He said, "Those are pickled onions".
So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came
Up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle
like diamonds". I said "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC
duck".
But I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I
Entered a competition and I won a years supply of
Marmite.. one jar.
Now did you know that if a stick insect laid its eggs
In a jar of marmite it would give birth to a litter of twiglets?
So this bloke says to me, "Can I come in your house
and talk about your carpets?" I thought, "That's all I
need, a Je-hoover's witness".
You see my next door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,
He's a catholic converter. > > >
So I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to
report a nuisance caller" he said "Not you again".
Now did you know all male tennis players are witches, for example Goran, even he's a witch?
So I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman
Wrapped in a barcode. I said "Are you two an item?"
And my personal favourite
So a lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload
Of terrapins, I thought, "That's a turtle disaster".
Seen them before, loved them then, love them still. Hee, hee, giggling, laughing, ooh, I might have peed a bit. Not good.
On that note, another really bad one, don't blame me, it's Wiggy's (Kal, that's my hubby);
Q: What does an old lady taste like?
A: Depends. ;);)
Really, I could do this all night guys, I've got books full of this crap. :)
:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by Altenweg
M. Oh god... I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. :D
And Alty... SO NOT COOL! My mind... you've soiled it forever!
:P :D
I warned you. Wiggy has a sick sense of humor. ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by friend4u178
And one of my fav's;
Confucius says,"man who goes to bed with itchy bum, wakes up with smelly finger."
Okay, I guess I'm going to get Starby's thread deleted too. These jokes are horrible. They sound so much better when spoken, and drunk, in the dark, when you are sleepy. Really, you'll have to take my word on that. ;)
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