Yeah, I have a feeling my sister would say the same thing. We have different ideas on everything and she has an opinion about EVERYTHING I do. An opinion I can handle, it's the judgmental stuff that gets on my nerves. Everything is a criticism or an attack. Well, thanks for listening to me, I didn't mean to change the subject.
So, the family here that doesn't judge is really life saving isn't it?? I know it has saved me a few times!
I am a Comfort? I am glad you see it that way!!

Hello all. Called in today, connor has a fever. So I'm here. :)

Synnen - sorry it is so rough on you, I know how it feels to be the odd one out in your family... I do everything backwards... kid, marriage, then graduation... lol... and the catholics they are can't take it. :)

J- I think the hairdo will look marvelous!

CBW - hope you are doing well.

Everyone else - Hope all is well!

I hear that AL!! I come from a long line of conservative Catholics, so me getting married when my youngest was three months, was quite an adjustment for everyone. A$$ backwards, is how I do everything, so maybe we should start a club for that!! LOL
Hope Connor feels better soon.

Oh, poor Connor, movies and gatorade today?
The boys are going to show up today. Kids had a busy swimming weekend, they went to bed at 7 and fell asleep at 7:01...

What's scary is that my family would be more okay with a baby before marriage than they are with the fact that we don't have kids.

Since pretty much everyone in my family was a teen mom, not a single one of them understands having a life without kids. That's a big part of the arguments--that I feel I should have the same respect for MY lifestyle as they have for THEIR lifestyle, and it just doesn't happen.

I am a second-class citizen in my family because we don't have kids.

Well that is just wrong. I don't think that is fair at all. Everyone lives life in their own way, why should you have kids just because they do? So basically no one approves of your life in your family? That is really just sad. I am sorry you have to deal with that kind of scrutiny, it is way more difficult than anything I have to manage with my family.

YOu always have us!!

:( that is sad, I'm so sorry.

I agree shattered... we should just form our own family of misfits, and bash around all over the place... we will have tons more fun.

Synn, that is ridiculous. The fact that you still get to make all of your own choices is hard for someone to undersatand when they have to make shoices about what the WHOLE family wants to do. Dinner, movie, clothes, daily activities. I bet your mother would love to have some alone time with JUST you. I like you the way you are and hope they come to realize what they are missing with the judgements. Hugs to you... Start

THE MISFITS, I LOVE IT!! GOod idea AL!!

LOL, I am the second class citizen in my family and I did everything the Catholic way. Got married in a catholic church, waited to have children until after I was married. My sister did everything the opposite. But for some reason I am the black sheep. Well, until I am needed, then I am the best thing in the world. Other than that, I don't really feel like part of my family at all.

Good thing I have such great in-laws.

Latley (past few years) I have disconnected myself from the people that bring me down. My dad doesn't like it but I tell him that there is no good in being around these people, there is just no good to come out of it.

How do you do it Start? I think that is something I am still learning. How do you disconnect? Why do we care so much what they think anyway?
J-9, even when you do it right, it seems there is always someone there to judge. I am sorry that you too struggle with family in that way. Although when they need you, they are sure of who to call to make it right! Families are strange aren't they?

We care because it is there right in our veins and the thought of family is overwhelming sometimes. From the highest to the lowest family member they all have played a part in our lives. So when you find someone who has no GOOD to offer, you leave the situation. YOu leave it alone instead of try to explain why you are right and they are wrong...

Happy Monday everyone - ug

Nothing like taking a week off to spend with the kids and come back to a pile of crapola and a list of problems and complaints on your desk.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by shatteredsoul

Although when they need you, they are sure of who to call to make it right!! Families are strange aren't they?

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This is actually the funny part. They called a couple of years ago about Dad's health. Wanting to know something or asking for advice. When I would tell them what they needed to know, or give my advice, I was wrong. Always just wrong. So, I quit calling, would not answer the phone, etc, it was easy cause we lived so far apart. I did not need the aggravation of them asking me, then putting me down. Not that I didn't love my parents, but I didn't need the drama and the insults.

Well, 6 months of no contact, I wouldn't even answer e-mails, I got an e-mail saying how right I was those long months ago. They wished they had listened to me in the first place. Now there was nothing that could have saved my Dad even back then as his health was beginning to spiral downward, but had they listened then he would have had a more productive last few years.

It is a shame that sometimes we have to step away from our families, for a short time, sometimes even longer, to see what is lacking in family dynamics. My sister and I still don't get along, my brother and I are 2 different people. But my mother has a new respect for me. It is sad that his death is what gave my mother a new respect for me, but sometimes it takes pain to find joy.

Mmmm, Emland, you are definitely rightO. Time to get to work sweet. Have a good day.

You are a lucky lady to see the bad bring some good. You always learn from your trials. I really like that about you. And yes sometimes it is too late.

I stepped away from my mother and my sister 10 years ago no regret here I see them maybe twice a year what's the point in being somewhere with people who make you uncomfortable and feel unwanted after traveling who knows for how long with no thanks its not like I have the money blow on petrol so screw it bens family are much nicer that's for sure.

Seems like everyone has a family that is disappointing in some way. I guess they can never always give you all of what you need and that is what friends are for.
J-9, it is too bad they took so long to hear you, it could have been a different road for all of you. That really is a shame. I am glad to hear that things are better with your mom.
I guess at the end of the day, we just have to forgive them for not being who we need them to be, and try to focus on the people who are there for us.
It is good to have In Laws that are kind and helpful, CBW, it is a shame that you don't feel comfortable with your own family. I have a feeling we all kind of feel that way, in some form or another.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by curlybenswife

I stepped away from my mother and my sister 10 years ago no regret here i see them maybe twice a year whats the point in being somewhere with people who make you uncomfortable and feel unwanted after traveling who knows for how long with no thanks its not like i have the money blow on petrol so screw it bens family are much nicer thats for sure.

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I feel exaclty what you just said. There is no point... we do what we have to and if people don't like it well, I say go find someone you like then.

You know... that's exactly it! I'm tired of driving who knows how long, spending my time and money, to be with people that want me to be something I'm not once I'm there!

So... since we're sisters... are you going to teach your kids to call me Aunty Synn?