Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Jokes (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=385)
-   -   Dear Paris Hilton (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=90059)

  • May 7, 2007, 10:00 AM
    magprob
    Dear Paris Hilton
    Dear Paris,
    As a retired prison guard, I feel it is my obligation to warn you not to take candy from any stocky, short haired female inmates that have the name "DADDY" tatooed across the back or their neck.

    Yours truly, Magprob
  • May 7, 2007, 10:38 AM
    Lord_Darkclaw
    You're not a very nice person are you Magprob?
    America must be the only Country in the developed world where rape is considered a legitimate punishment in jails and prisons.

    Paris Hilton is reckless and stupid but that doesn't make her a bad person, most likely she is a nice when people meet her in person. 45 days in jail is a serious and difficult experience for anyone, let alone a woman who has no real experience of living a normal low-income lifestyle. Hopefully she will be carefully guarded; as a very famous celebrity she is at high risk of assault and abuse by other prisoners.
  • May 7, 2007, 03:03 PM
    magprob
    It's called protective custody and I have judged no one but you are judging me. For what it is worth, I'm just giving Paris some good advice. If you think Paris is such a sweet heart then let me know when she allows you to shake her hand.
    Since I was a prison guard, I stopped many young and tender looking gents, not unlike yourself, from getting raped. I have walked right in on it happening and risked my life to stop it. If you assume I think rape is OK in any fashion then you have insulted me and I say you have proven you are not a very nice person. You should go and reread my post then tell me where I say that I condone that sort of behavior.
    You see, I also happen to know that your dearest Paris will more than likely end up in protective custody right out the gate because all she has to do is request it. As soon as she hits the cell block, the shift commander will probably move her there just to keep his shift quiet.
    For you people that are caught up in the Paris Hilton soap opera, we know this event is just an exciting twist in the plot. It will, in the long run, "boost the ratings." Makes me want to throw up.
  • May 7, 2007, 03:49 PM
    shygrneyzs
    Paris Hilton only gets 45 days and already people in Hollywood are crying in outrage, saying she is being discriminated against. Gee Whiz - if that were you or I, we would be seeing more than 45 days. She violated the law - not once, but again - a clear violation, which shows her utmost disrespect for any court or law.

    She will come out more famous than before she went in. She will write book, make a movie, perhaps a new reality series. Her fame just went beyond solid gold.

    Sick, isn't it?
  • May 7, 2007, 03:58 PM
    saraispiel19
    Huh? pαris hilton is in jαil?-- whαt for?. wow NEWS TO ME

    Ooh for driving while her license is suspended?--wow-- I wish my pαrole officer wαs thαt nice to me!
  • May 7, 2007, 04:55 PM
    magprob
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by shygrneyzs
    Paris Hilton only gets 45 days and already people in Hollywood are crying in outrage, saying she is being discriminated against. Gee Whiz - if that were you or I, we would be seeing more than 45 days. She violated the law - not once, but again - a clear violation, which shows her utmost disrespect for any court or law.

    She will come out more famous than before she went in. She will write book, make a movie, perhaps a new reality series. Her fame just went beyond solid gold.

    Sick, isn't it?

    Yea, people in Hollywood can't understand why the judge didn't let her pay her way out of it! You get the amount of justice you can pay for in Hollywood. OJ and Barretta are two that come to mind right off.

    [QUOTE=Lord_Darkclaw]You're not a very nice person are you Magprob?
    America must be the only Country in the developed world where rape is considered a legitimate punishment in jails and prisons.

    And another thing, American Prisons DO NOT allow inmates to rape each other. Yes it does happen but in most units the are 200 to 300 inmates and only one or two guards. That is best case scenerio. In most cases, they are way more over crowded. I'll tell you that the inmates in your British prisons are not just having tea and crumpits while watching Benny Hill reruns. I'm sorry ole chap, but your bloody out of touch.
  • May 7, 2007, 08:49 PM
    Lord_Darkclaw
    I think you made my point for me Mabprob in that you found the idea of Paris Hilton being sexually assaulted amusing.
  • May 7, 2007, 10:45 PM
    magprob
    Poppycock!
  • May 7, 2007, 11:17 PM
    Skell
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by magprob
    Poppycock!

    World Wide Words: Poppycock

    Are you Dutch Mag?
  • May 7, 2007, 11:23 PM
    Queenbeewisdom75
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by magprob
    Dear Paris,
    As a retired prison guard, I feel it is my obligation to warn you not to take candy from any stocky, short haired female inmates that have the name "DADDY" tatooed across the back or their neck.

    Yours truely, Magprob

    Paris and her mother complaining that 45 days is cruel and unnecessary... I mean jeez what did she think she was going to get an ankle bracelet and a slap on the wrist. Paris needs to take responsibility for her actions and the judge did the right thing by putting her in jail and 45 days is nothing she's lucky her nutty irresponsible tail got that instead of spending several years behind bars in a state penitentiary.
  • May 7, 2007, 11:24 PM
    Matt3046
    1 Attachment(s)
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by magprob
    Poppycock!

    I also love poppycock Attachment 3536 [IMG]]
  • May 8, 2007, 05:53 AM
    Emland
    I think I can speak for many of us who are making fun of Paris Hilton's recent judgment. We aren't cheering for her to get raped or beat up in jail. We just want this little prima donna to have an encounter of real life. She is famous for no other reason except that she is a spoiled rich kid whose money has gotten her out of every little snag in life.

    I applaud the judge for not being intimidated by her "celebrity" or her money. She was on 36 months probation and within 6 months had violated it. She got a warning then did it again. None of us on the lower rungs of the economic ladder would have been given so much leeway. She could well afford a driver to haul her around in that 250k Bentley. She just believed that little things like laws don't apply to her in her exhaulted position.

    Paris Hilton needs to be brought down a couple of pegs. I had respect for her mother until I read about her reaction to the judgement. No wonder PH is such a piece of work. That family has the money, power and position to do something positive in this world, and all they can do is party - pathetic.
  • May 8, 2007, 06:20 AM
    Allheart
    Lord – I do understand what you are saying. I feel awful for Paris. But let me first say, that NO Magprob, in no way was expressing joy for what Paris could possibly face.
    Mag tries to hide it, but he is a good guy (sorry to give you up Mag 

    Sorry, but I am not glad at all that Paris is being made an example of. I think it completely stinks and it just sickens me. If “they” really want to prove a point, then please put the “hollywooders” who commit real crime behind bars, then I would be happy. Not some young girl, who, lets be honest, most people dislike, because she is rich, just by being born and she is beautiful. I just adore Paris and I wish this sentence would just go away.

    I don't think on either side of the tracks, Paris gets a fair shake, by the haves nor from the have nots.

    I don't blame her Mom one bit. Put the disgusting murders in jail, and the football player who was behind an animal fighting ring. That's something to be proud of putting a stop to Judge.

    Paris is the sacrificial lamb so the rest of Hollyweird can continue on getting away with murder and meyhem. Disgusting.

    Paris appears to be a genuinely sweet girl and I bet she makes the most of it and I don't mean profiting from it. Paris appears to enjoy meeting people from all walks of life. Yes, I was one to watch the Simple Life and I enjoyed ever minute. Both Paris and Nicole had me laughing for hours.

    Paris may be privledged but it appears she doesn't have a mean bone in her body and I just hope this experience will be more a positive than a negative.
  • May 8, 2007, 06:27 AM
    iAMfromHuntersBar
    I think she's an idiot, and she deserves it!

    She knew her license had been suspended, and she's a celebrity, she knows papparazi follow her everywhere! She had to know this would happen!

    And what? She should get away with it because she's famous? Behave!

    Throw her to the lions I say!
  • May 8, 2007, 06:38 AM
    Allheart
    I am - I don't think she is an idiot - I think she is adorable and just not exposed to the every day life like we are -

    I do not think she should get away with it, but if she is going to be thrown to the lions, as though the big bad wolf Judge did his thing, then they need to make sure the rest of the sorry privledged society pays their dues as well.

    Makes me sick how they are making an example of her. In some ways WE helped create who Pairs is.
  • May 8, 2007, 06:39 AM
    Krs
    I agree.. she is dumb but rich! And has a surname that he guaranteed money!
    Its so who u know and who or what your name is!!
  • May 8, 2007, 06:42 AM
    Allheart
    LOL oh boy did I open up a can of worms - As Paris would say... That's hot LOL

    No, she should NOT get away with drunk driving not at all. To be honest, I forgot about that.

    All I am saying is - it does not make me happy that she will be doing 45 days. I feel bad for her, because I feel SO many people are SO glad she is being put away.


    I hope you understand what I am saying now Emland.
  • May 8, 2007, 06:44 AM
    curlybenswife
    If you are silly enough to get caught then you pay the penalty the sad thing is that girl could pay for a chaufer 50 million times over and yet she chose to drive herself the fact remains that when she entered the car she broke the law plain and simple doesn't matter who you are the law is the law.
  • May 8, 2007, 06:45 AM
    iAMfromHuntersBar
    I'm just sick of reading about 'celebrities' getting away with stuff week after week after
    week after week!
    (I could go on and on and on, I won't though!)

    And why? Just because they're rich and famous! It's frustrating!

    If she had come on this board (under a username like 'CaughtDrivingWithoutLicense') and said;

    "Hey Everyone, I'm Worried! I Had My License Suspended A While Back, But I Decided To Drive Anyway, And The Police Pulled Me Over, And Now It Looks Like I'm Going To Jail For 45 Days ... What Should I Do?"

    No-one would have sympathy for her!
  • May 8, 2007, 06:46 AM
    Allheart
    I do agree, CBW, but then they ALL should pay. That is all I am saying. It just gets me that some are say "Finally the privledged are paying" No, they are not. Paris is paying for the rest of them.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by iAMfromHuntersBar
    I'm just sick of reading about 'celebrities' getting away with stuff week after week after
    week after week!
    (I could go on and on and on, I won't though!)

    And why? Just because they're rich and famous! It's frustrating!

    If she had come on this board (under a username like 'CaughtDrivingWithoutLicense') and said;

    "Hey Everyone, I'm Worried! I Had My License Suspended A While Back, But I Decided To Drive Anyway, And The Police Pulled Me Over, And Now It Looks Like I'm Going To Jail For 45 Days ... What Should I Do?"

    No-one would have sympathy for her!


    Exactly my point. "They" want "Us" to think the rich and famous are paying by feeding Paris to the wolves. Not so. The others will continue to get away with their ways. Paris is not liked really anywhere and that's why it was considered okay to roast her.
  • May 8, 2007, 06:54 AM
    Emland
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Allheart
    iam - I don't think she is an idiot - I think she is adorable and just not exposed to the every day life like we are -


    Allheart, I am not trying to be mean, but have you read her testimony in the Zeta Graff slander case? I believe she may be functionally illiterate.
  • May 8, 2007, 07:00 AM
    Allheart
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Emland
    Allheart, I am not trying to be mean, but have you read her testimony in the Zeta Graff slander case? I believe she may be functionally illiterate.

    Em, if she is. Then bless her heart. Seriously. There is a lot worse things that someone can be then not bright.

    Em, I do understand what you are saying, as well as everyone else. But to me, Paris is too easy a target and I find no glee in it at all. I find it sickening.
  • May 8, 2007, 08:27 AM
    magprob
    Allheart, you are just too sweet for your own good. GOD bless you child.
  • May 9, 2007, 12:42 AM
    iAMfromHuntersBar
    I've just heard that she sacked her publicist for not TELLING her she couldn't drive without a licence!

    How did she ever get one to start with? Lol!
  • May 9, 2007, 03:10 AM
    Krs
    OMG what pure muppett!!
  • May 9, 2007, 06:27 AM
    NowWhat
    I don't think she is stupid - I think she plays stupid on TV. Very well, I might add.

    I think a lot of "celebrities" think they are untouchable. So, when someone does get punished - they are shocked. When in reality, if this was an average joe - he would be thankful 45 days was all he got.
    Especially when you think about why the license was suspended in the 1st place.
  • May 10, 2007, 01:34 AM
    Allheart
    Seems Paris said it a whole lot better than me. I think there is a whole lot more good to Paris then she will ever be given credit for. I think you will find the below interesting.

    Paris Hilton: 'I'm ready to face the consequences of violating probation'
  • May 10, 2007, 06:57 AM
    Matt3046
    1 Attachment(s)
    I personally think that her IQ alone should get her out of jail. Is it fair to put someone that "slow" in jail? Nicole Richie should have to go with her, (so she has someone to tell her what to do) and think about what a wonderful TV show it will make. "The Simple Life Prison" How cool is that going to be.

    Oh yeah that's not so "hot"




    Attachment 3552




    Pure evil. All of them.
  • May 10, 2007, 05:55 PM
    magprob
    It looks as though Paris may only do 1/2 of her original sentence. Due to over crowding, females are released early. In light of her statement that she realizes driving drunk is dangerous, I think she may see the reality of her misdeeds and hopefully, has learned her lesson. 21 days would be OK with me. I just do not like drunk drivers. I have grand kids, kids, wife and assorted family out there driving. The people driving drunk need to learn the first time around to stop.
  • May 10, 2007, 08:25 PM
    Matt3046
    But will that be long enough for the show?
  • May 10, 2007, 08:40 PM
    Sunshine2
    Matt you are so cool
  • May 10, 2007, 08:41 PM
    magprob
    Yes, it will get boring quick!
  • May 10, 2007, 11:44 PM
    Allheart
    Emland agrees: Do you think if you add the combined IQs of these girls it would add up to a double digit?

    Not even sure what to say to that. Just plain sad. I would much rather have a good heart then feel I had a superior mind and look down on others.
    Emland, you are not alone, there are many people who think like you, doesn't make it pleasant though.

    What a curse it is to be beautiful. Sure brings out the ugly in others.

    Sorry, but it is how I feel and well worth getting another reddy. LOL :)
  • May 11, 2007, 12:06 AM
    Matt3046
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Allheart
    Emland agrees: Do you think if you add the combined IQs of these girls it would add up to a double digit?

    Not even sure what to say to that. Just plain sad. I would much rather have a good heart then feel I had a superior mind and look down on others.
    Emland, you are not alone, there are many people who think like you, doesn't make it pleasant though.

    What a curse it is to be beautiful. Sure brings out the ugly in others.

    Sorry, but it is how I feel and well worth getting another reddy. LOL :)

    ,
    She was joking, it's my fault for starting the whole thing anyway. These girls certainly know how to make money and live a better life than I will ever dream of (even with their various problems) so who's stupid?
  • May 11, 2007, 12:19 AM
    iAMfromHuntersBar
    I love Lyndsay Lohan! She's purdy!
  • May 11, 2007, 02:31 AM
    Krs
    Did anyone hear about Lyndsay Lohan Cocaine addiction!

    20 fat lines in one night!
    Then after hours party at her house, once in the door she strips naked bends over the table to snort another line!

    Oh these fabulous girls ;)
  • May 11, 2007, 02:36 AM
    iAMfromHuntersBar
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Krs
    Did anyone hear about Lyndsay Lohan Cocaine addiction!

    20 fat lines in one night!
    Then after hours party at her house, once in the door she strips naked bends over the table to snort another line!

    Oh these fabulous girls ;)

    Ha ha, class!

    Now that's the kind of girl you want to take home to your Mum!



    I can forgive all that though, because she's got nice mammaries!
  • May 11, 2007, 03:27 AM
    NeedKarma
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Allheart
    What a curse it is to be beautiful. Sure brings out the ugly in others.

    It's sad that you perceived that way. Very superficial view. The 'ugliness' that you see in others is no relegated to beautiful people but as a reaction to their actions.
  • May 11, 2007, 03:36 AM
    Allheart
    Sorry NK there isn't really anything superficial about me at all. I find it ugly for people to be unkind to another. That's what I mean about being ugly.

    It is so sad that I perceive it that way. You are so right. But I see it so often. And perhaps I jumped the gun here. But it burns my britches terrible that people are treated unkind because they are beautiful or may be rich or God forbid both.

    And not sure what calling out Paris's intelligence or lack there of, has anything to do with her actions.

    Sorry NK, I wish my perception was different. I truly do.
  • May 11, 2007, 03:57 AM
    rrr
    Just put Paris int the chair. Or make a hamburger out of her; she is a one of a kind cow.
    DIE, PARIS!!

    :D

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:18 AM.