All I can think of is "llama llama cheesecake llama llama llama duck"

I walk around singing "llama llama duck" for days after I see that video again.

A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue.

Doctor: "What happened?"

Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp."

Doctor: "I have a real good medicine for that. When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of chamomile tea and start gargling with it. Just gargle and gargle."

Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.

Woman: "Doctor, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk, I gargled with chamomile tea. I gargled and gargled, and nothing happened!"

Doctor: "You see how keeping your mouth shut helps!

M, you may want to run now! :rolleyes:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by altenweg

m, you may want to run now! :rolleyes:

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Attachment 28626

That's cute, but you're still in trouble. ;)

That made me laugh and I almost forgot that I should be tracking you down to beat you with a rusty spork. Almost.

M, over here, quick! Hide behind the Doberman. She'll lick 'em to death.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by friend4u178

Attachment 28626

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What is that... thing? :p

As a woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom
Door, she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from
Within. Opening the door, she observed her daughter
With a vibrator.

Shocked, she asked: 'what in the world are you
Doing?'

The daughter replied: 'Mum, I'm thirty-five years
Old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as
I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and
Leave me alone.'

The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz
Coming from the other side of the closed bedroom
Door. Upon entering the room, he observed his
Daughter making passionate love to her vibrator.

To his query as to what she was doing, the daughter
Said: 'dad I'm thirty-five, unmarried, and this
Thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a
Husband. Please, go away and leave me alone.'

A couple days later, the wife came home from a
Shopping trip , placed the groceries on the kitchen
Counter, and heard that buzzing noise coming from,
Of all places, the living room. She entered that
Area and observed her husband sitting on the couch,
Downing a cold beer, and staring at the TV.

The vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing
Like crazy.

The wife asked: 'What the f.. Are you doing?'

The husband replied: 'I'm watching football with my
Son-in-law.'

That may be the best I've seen posted anywhere, M.

Love it M, had to spread the rep. :)

A lady tells her Man:


"I demand good manners in bed, just like at the dinner table".


The man climbs into bed slowly and says:


"Honey, would you please pass me the vagina?"

There's something just... wrong... about that. Thanks. Tons.

Here are a few I hope you'll enjoy.

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Haha that was great

More?

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You're welcome boys. ;)

///o^) I like them!

Oops, put up the wrong picture, then took it down. I can't find the right one

Even more?

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Wharrgarbl :)