cdad, the idea of moving the water heater outside is an idea I very much like, however, there is also cement in the same cubby as the water heater, I'm not sure how much but I think it may be an old chimney. It'll be some time before we get a new washer & dryer, but I will consider the over under option, however will that work well with one of short stature? If I ever get some help, I think the washer & dryer will both sit against the far wall side by side just fine, if so I bet I could fit a typical shelving unit in there, & I don't use the door that leads outside that's in there either so really I could fit 2 in there- bam! Pantry! :)
I wonder if its possible to set up one of those microwave over the oven set ups? But I still have to think about my short stature. Last thing I want to do is dump something hot onto myself.

Yes to moving cabinets etc, except move the dishwasher left, with a smaller sink cab, and add a cab to the right of the dishwasher.
Take down bearing wall: not so bad, but it means propping up the ceilings on either side with temp plates and studs. It means a beam across, and knowing how deep it has to be, an engineering question dependent on what is above (whole house) and off to the sides (a good contractor will know how deep). It will easily add $1,000 to the job.
Open shelf under cabinets: plan what you will be putting on the counters that might be too tall to fit under them, and leave open. Some people want perfect symmetry; I don't.
I agree with everyone about using the adjacent tiny room for storage, such as a pantry. It could just be wire racks.
I don't use a range hood. I no longer vent anything into ceilings because I have seen too much heat loss in winter. I won't even vent a dryer to the outside, and people have to shower with the door open. But if you do a lot of frying, put in a hood. I'm thinking of inventing a fine mesh screen to hang over my cooktop, and just washing it when it gets dirty. I have a tiny battery powered fan for blowing vapor out of the kitchen when I'm boiling pasta. Helps add humidity in winter. I don't do much cooking in summer.
My ideal kitchen has 3 heights of counters (I have 2 now). I don't care how it looks. I like to cook and am all about practical and what I want without costing a lot.

I would also suggest that if you have big box stores near you to visit them as they usually have kitchens already set up in the store and you can test them for size.

I agree with joy in that every project is as individual as the person that the space is for. For now advance research is your best friend. When you start getting down to the nuts and bolts of it you should have a good idea of how your going to represent the project and yourself within it.

I like my microwave at counter height so I can peer in it and so that lifting in and out is neither too high nor too low. As I get shorter, I'd like it a bit lower!

You can also consider some kitchen remodelling ideas at FabFurnish - modular kitchen solutions to remodel your kitchen