Hi everyone,

The director of the day care where my son goes twice a week believes that he may be gifted. She wants to have him assessed. I have done a lot of reading up on this subject, and have looked at the characteristics of gifted children... but I am still not sure if he is just very intelligent or is actually "gifted". Not even fully sure if there is much of a difference! There are some things that he is capable of doing that shock other parents and the day care director says is not "normal" for a 24 month old to be doing (turned 2 on 19 December). This consists primarily of :

Knows full alphabet and recognizes the letters individually (since 20 months old)
Counts to 10 and recognizes the numbers individually (since 20 months old)
Counts items accurately up to 3 and tries to count items higher but not as accurately
Has just started reading (16 words that I know of so far) words like fun, cow, goat, pig, cup, bellybutton, rhinocerus, hair, and stand up (he has been watching the "Your Baby Can Read" series for 2 months).
Has a very long attention span for instructional/educational videos, but not for regular TV or entertainment-based videos
Knows shapes such as circle, oval, rectangle, square, star, heart, triangle (since 19 months old)
Knows colors such as red, black, white, yellow, orange, purple, blue, green (since 20 months)
Knows at least 150 words
Plays on his own for 1.5 hours in his room
Fascinated with letters and numbers, and names them while out and about
Loves books and being read to, started turning pages when he was about 14 months old
Quite good at puzzles, does them quickly
Says things like "a clock - a circle"
Is starting to understand humor

I am just looking for some guidance on this subject, and I just want to make sure that he is provided with the environment he needs. He gets lots of play time with other children as well as on his own and with us. But he is very interested in learning and seems to prefer books etc. sometimes to other "normal" 24 month old activities. Will he be OK with going to a normal school or should we start thinking about a different type of school when the time comes? I was above average in reading, and my husband has an IQ of 146 and is fantastic with mathematics and engineering.

My son James does seem to be far more interested in letters and numbers than the other two year olds, but I don't want to miss the fact that he is a young child as well as an eager learner. Also don't want him to be labeled as "gifted" if he is just very intelligent as some sort of line seems to be crossed when that happens (how people treat the child, school issues etc.. ). I just need some guidance.

Thanks for your help!

Cheers,
Lorraine

Hi there...
My very humble two cents having been there with my own brood. He's two, let him have fun being a little kid at this point he should learn how to socialize with other children and how to get along with different groups of them. That really is more important than knowing "facts" at this point.
I wouldn't worry about "the right environment" until a couple of years from now. If you want to enrich his learning, do it at home, and do it through play... they are only little for so long...

I have to agree 100% with Tallarin. I got the label (at about age 8) and spent a few years in a 'special' environment -- worst time of my life! Other than that, my parents were never too much into education so I grew up on TV and lots of parental love. In my humble opinion that was far more of a factor in my success in all areas of life than any time in the 'gifted' program.

Love your kids; make them the most important thing in your life (I have two, so I'm preaching what I practice). Whether they are 'gifted', slightly intelligent, or just average, that will be by far the best thing for them.

Will have a chat with the specialist when she assesses him. Thanks for the advice...

Let children be children, there is plenty of time latter to let them be pushed and controlled

Hello once again...
Only you can answer this: what are YOUR reasons for assessing cutie pie? And what are the advantages of him reading 2nd grade level books at 3 years of age? (o.k. I apologize if I am exaggerating, but I am trying to make a point here). Does he like the day care he is going to right now? If so, what would happen if you make a change and he doesn't see his buddies anymore?

How much did YOU (by reading to him, showing him shapes and colors, counting bricks on the side walk... ) help in him learning all the things he knows by now. Kids who are talked to/read to a lot know more words than those who are left to their own devices. Parental attention is the best teacher for little ones in my opinion.

From personal experience once again (we did the co-op thing when the brood was little) kids learn by play and from their peers. My son was in a gifted program in 3-5th grade and he really resented being given more work than his friends that didn't go to GATE - not to mention the stuff he missed in the classroom. Plus one he got to middle school everyone was treated the same. My daughter got invited to go to the full time GATE school this year and we said "no thanks" because she's having fun with her friends and learning and exploring on her own and that's good for us. If she ends up going to a locall community college instead of Harvard/STanford/Pick an Ivy League school, so be it...

I have 2 friends with kids in "gifted" schools and the kids are under so much pressure from the teachers (japanese classes, projects, endless assessments, o.k. they went to Space Camp THAT was COOL but any kid can do that on their own... ) the look worn out, plus at least in these here parts those schools don't come cheap.:eek:

Once all is said and done, it's your decision, but if he's happy now, why change things?

Just my two cents...

We are not pushing him in the least, he just has a very strong desire to learn! I was not expecting it, and was not quite sure what to do as he was not acting like the other 2 years olds. I do not have any intention of removing him from his current daycare (he only goes 2 days a week), and they are great about giving the kids lots of opportunities to do different activities if they want (painting, pretend play... etc). He has many friends and spends lots of time in his sandbox and playing with his toys, but is very much like a sponge and always wants to learn more. I just want to know the best way to give him what he wants.

I did not have a very good education in the public school system, and want to make sure he does not have the same experience. After some more research I am going to seriously consider a Montessori school for him.

He is the most wonderful little person, and he is relying on us to give him the best environment we can. It is common knowledge that a secure loving childhood and solid education go a long way to giving them the best chance to be successful adults doing whatever they choose to do. Denying a two year old the chance to learn when that is what they want to do would be a real shame. Preconceived notions about children will not dictate what learning experiences my son is allowed to participate in, I am going to let him guide me and decide for himself.

I understand the concern you and the other two posters have, but I think my reason for asking the questions that I did was misunderstood. But thank you for your concern...

I was actually hoping that an "expert" would be answering my question, as that is what this board claims will happen. Am I in the wrong place to be getting the advice that I was looking for?

Cheers,
Lorraine

Hey there...
Don't be upset please, like I said, I have been there with my own kids, they are not preconcieved notions, I am talking from my own experience with two very bright (labeled as gifted) children.

If he is happy in his preschool and has lots of friends and is learning, you already are providing him the right environment. I have quite a few friends with gifted children who have tried to enrich their children's environment so much that the kids are overscheduled (my daughter had a friend when she was three years old who could NEVER make a play date because she was in preschool three days a week, then she was taking dance, art and swimming lessons!! ) and never have time to play and think and just "be bored" - which is actually a good thing and I think this is the concern that the people who answered your question voiced.

Montessori schools are great and the one in our area offers things the other schools don't. We don't attend because we chose a Dual Immersion Bilingual Program where my kids have learned Spanish since Kindergarten, so they speak, read and write in two languages, this is how we chose to enrich their environment instead of opting for the GATE (gifted and talented) programs they qualified for. We have also chosen not to have our kids in more than one activity at the time (sometimes they do musicals, some other times they play soccer), and that works for US. For some of my friends, their children need more than that, and that's perfect for THEM too!

Bottom line: let your little one be the guide and trust your instincts, the specialist will give you a recommendation and maybe will open up some options you hadn't considered, but I will share some advice with you: relax and enjoy this time, don't worry so much about the right school for a three year old... if he's happy and loves his teachers and friends, then he's where he belongs...

Happy New year!!

Hellow Lorraine,

I also have a 27-month-year-old son who has the milestones similar to yours kid. To some extent, I do understand your feelings, like I hate friends think I am bragging or pushing my son too much when I talk about him.

In our case, we are the aliens living in the States. At home, I and my husband only speak our languages (Chinese+Japanese) to our son, that makes him unable to understand English sentences (only knows single English words). For that reason, not a lot of people here know he is "different" (Only Once, when he was 14 months in Warmart, other parents realized he was pointing the signs in English and reading them in a Chinese-Japanese-English accent :) ). I was a gifted child myself and treated special in the childhood, so I now feel safer if my son can be treated normal.

I also realized that I myself had a poor people skill, perhaps because I was arranged in a special class concentrating in math and science calculations at school. When a kid was busy for calculations and learning at school, did she actually have many chances talking to and getting along with other kids? Thus, I now care more about my son's social sills than his intelligence things. I started arranging playgroups for him and sending him to the day care playing with kids some days in a week. I really hope that my son will enjoy being a kid in his childhood and will not get much frustration with people like I did before.

I am not born a good parent. I am learning to be one from my own experiences and my own observations. It is SO hard!! But, I believe, a parent who, with love, attempts to view the world in kid's viewpoints is a good parent, and hopefully, my son will agree it later on.

Jackie

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Let children be children, there is plenty of time latter to let them be pushed and controled

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No offence but this type of reply demonstrates someone who either doesn't have gifted children or doesn't understand them!

Gifted children have a thirst for learning. It can only be satisfied by quenching that desire.

No amount of 'go play with children your own age' will suffice.

We are not talking about 'pushing gifted children', we are talking about meeting their specific needs.

They are gifted (i.e. have higher levels of potential) or talented (expressing/actuating those higher levels of abilities) - they are not normal in the sense of other children in respect to their area of giftedness.

No-one is advocating the removal of playtime for children (or if they do, they ought to be shot - figuratively speaking) however, gifted, highly gifted and especially exceptionally gifted children want to play with peers their 'intellectual' equals - not with children their own age.

Would you put a talented child in sports (say they have exceptional running speed) with a child their own age! Or course not - you will match them with children/peers their own ability to work with and relate to.

Would you put a talented child with high functioning music abilities with music students their own age OR their own ability? With peers their own ability of course!

It's the same with children who's minds are showing great promise in certain areas - you group them with kids of the same ability, not necessarily their own age.

Gifted/talented children are normally thus inclined in a specific area and not across all disciplines. For example, I know of a girl with an IQ of 200! She was exceptional with reading/grammar when young, however, her spelling ability was only slightly above class average - her teacher gave her a hard time when she didn't do exceptionally well in spelling and said "and I thought you were one of these clever people!" - such is the ignorance about gifted/talented children.

I have children who are gifted. One is incredibly creative and is always thinking outside the square and solving problems in ways that make me scratch my head as to how she even thought that way. Another two are very good with numbers etc. Each of my children play and associate with others who think like they do - this is THEIR choosing. In other areas, they pick playmates who are not their intellectual equals and enjoy their company as well.

Have a read about the exceptionally gifted boy called "Terrance Tao" and have a look at how his parents didn't push him but they still managed to feed him the information he needed - and gifted children need it.

Pushing children is damaging and harmful - but so is stifling them, they end up being rebellious and bored.

Keep feeding them and presenting them with what they thirst for and don't listen to those that say "Let them be children" - these people fail to understand gifted/talented children and their specific needs - teach them to satisfy their own quest for knowledge and information and don't push - truly gifted/talented children will amass the information anyhow - provided it is presented to them and not withheld, like so many of the people who only want children to associate and play with others of equal age want to do - this is the biggest mistake people make about gifted/talented children.

And as someone else mentioned - do enjoy the time - you will not pass this way again - nor will your children.

p.s. any decent psychologist will probably refuse to test a 2 year old - that is too young unless they are showing exceptionally gifted abilities - like Terrance Tao did at age 2 - he was doing simple adding/subtracting at that age.

Have a read of some of Mirica Gross's work on gifted children etc

In terms of the questions asked by the original poster, I'd say you child is gifted.

My kids at age 2 were speaking fluently (but not ultra clear) and with very complex sentences for their age. The creative one had a vocab. Of about 400+ words. She could easily hold conversations with 4 and 5 year olds.

One was counting to 20 and grouping objects up to 5 lots and then adding onto that group. (i.e. 5 + 2 makes 7 etc). She knew to start at 5 and count onwards, not recount again. It's not really how 'much' they know but rather the rate and complexity at which they learn.

My kids seemed to only need to be shown something once or twice if the concept was abstract and they just 'picked it up' and they can handle quite amazing amounts of detailed specific information and their brains seem to be able to sum it up and categorize it very quickly and efficiently. My eldest we spent a fair amount of time showing stuff, but the others we have spent about 30 - 50% of the same amount of time with and they are matching the eldest easily - in fact the 3rd will surpass them all and the 4th (who's just turned 13 months) already has a vocabulary of above 100+ words and is pointing to words in books (but not reading them!).

Remember, all children are special, but not all children are gifted (gifted is approximately 10% of the population and have IQ's above 130).

Enjoy your kids

:-)

Hi Gumshoe, thank you for the info, you have answered a lot of my questions... and clarified many thoughts I had regarding gifted children.

And thanks for the advice everyone!

Apparently the person who will assess him will not be testing him but observing him as the daycare wants to know where his weaknesses and strengths are. They are pretty serious about providing the learning environment the kids need which is wonderful!

Will let you all know how it goes.

Cheers,
Lorraine

Dear Lorraine,

Your situation has come across my desk many, many times. I work at the World Council for Gifted and Talented Children. If you would like, please visit our website, wcgtc.org (which is still being developed), and perhaps I can help you with your questions (I can suggest books that would be quite helpful). Also, we have a discussion link on our website; please feel free to post a question! We are a non-profit, membership based organization that offers newsletters and refereed journals to our members. Often, we include the discussion link questions in our newsletter.

Hope we can help somehow!

All the very best to you,
Annette

Hi right now I'm 17 years old, when I was your child's age I was doing the same things, even more. Right now I'm a junior in high school, ranked number 1 in my class, starter on the football, basketball, and baseball teams. By being intelligent I pick up on a lot of things and habits people do and have. You may totally discard all of this because I'm just a 17 year old. That's your choice. If I were you I would just let your two year old do what he wants and not interfere. I say this for a few reasons. First, if he's not a gifted child there is nothing more annoying in life that a person who thinks they are smart and really aren't, it will actually hurt him in the long run. Second, the smartest person who ever roamed the earth was leonardo da vinci. He stood out as being the smartest of the smart because he wasn't molded by a teacher. He taught himself. If he really is great let him learn on his own so he will be the greatest

At nineteen months old my son knew all the lower and upper case alphabets, all colors and shapes
At 24 months he could recite the opening monologue of Star Trek the Next Generation verbatim
At age three he could name all the states and their capitals and give you the make and model of just about any car that drove by
At age four he knew, in order, all the Presidents of the United States and their Vice Presidents and the wives of each, All the planets of the solar system, their moons, and what the chemical composition of the atmosphere was on the gaseous planets. All the countries of the world and their capital cities.
At age five he had memorized the periodic table of elements. (yes,everything on it)
At age 15 he was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, a form of Autism.

Pasmith, I am sorry to hear about your son. Luckily my son is not displaying ANY of the symptoms of Asperger's Syndrome, and I don't believe that Autism is a concern in his case. Thanks for the suggestion...

Cheers,
Lorraine

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Originally Posted by pasmith

At nineteen months old my son knew all the lower and upper case alphabets, all colors and shapes
At 24 months he could recite the opening monologue of Star Trek the Next Generation verbatim
At age three he could name all the states and their capitals and give you the make and model of just about any car that drove by
At age four he knew, in order, all the Presidents of the United States and their Vice Presidents and the wives of each, All the planets of the solar system, their moons, and what the chemical composition of the atmosphere was on the gaseous planets. All the countries of the world and their capital cities.
At age five he had memorized the periodic table of elements. (yes,everything on it)
At age 15 he was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, a form of Autism.

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That's sad to hear - especially since your son was showing such high levels of ability.

A large % of aspergers children show above normal levels of intelligence.

I think the saddest aspect of Aspergers is that they cannot or have extreme difficulty showing empathy - that's got to hurt as a parent :(

I thought one of my kids had aspergers actually - but it ended up being SM (selective mutism - Extreme form of shyness lasting longer than 1 month etc see Welcome to the Website of the Selective Mutism Group - Childhood Anxiety Network if your interested) - very similar in lots of ways to aspergers except SM kids can show empathy. It brings tears to my eye's at times watching them because they really want to speak and help others but their tongue is tied.

To start with, at preschool, they thought my child had development delays. They were living two different lives. At home, they were chatty, showing high levels of intelligence, yet when at preschool, they didn't talk or use any verbal communication.
When we got told their may be an issue/developmental delay we couldn't believe it.

Thankfully, my wife kept accurate records of what our kids did at various stages and we have lots of video footage showing them doing various things. This footage proved invaluable to the developmental specialists etc who concluded they were highly intelligent yet suffered from SM. At least we got an answer and it confirmed a lot of things - you take the good with the bad and accept that roses have thorns too - like we all do - that's the wonder and splendor of human beings.

:-)

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Originally Posted by rainrad2002

Hi everyone,

The director of the day care where my son goes twice a week believes that he may be gifted. She wants to have him assessed. I have done a lot of reading up on this subject, and have looked at the characteristics of gifted children...but I am still not sure if he is just very intelligent or is actually "gifted". Not even fully sure if there is much of a difference! There are some things that he is capable of doing that shock other parents and the day care director says is not "normal" for a 24 month old to be doing (turned 2 on 19 December). This consists primarily of :

Knows full alphabet and recognizes the letters individually (since 20 months old)
Counts to 10 and recognizes the numbers individually (since 20 months old)
Counts items accurately up to 3 and tries to count items higher but not as accurately
Has just started reading (16 words that I know of so far) words like fun, cow, goat, pig, cup, bellybutton, rhinocerus, hair, and stand up (he has been watching the "Your Baby Can Read" series for 2 months).
Has a very long attention span for instructional/educational videos, but not for regular tv or entertainment-based videos
Knows shapes such as circle, oval, rectangle, square, star, heart, triangle (since 19 months old)
Knows colors such as red, black, white, yellow, orange, purple, blue, green (since 20 months)
Knows at least 150 words
Plays on his own for 1.5 hours in his room
Fascinated with letters and numbers, and names them while out and about
Loves books and being read to, started turning pages when he was about 14 months old
Quite good at puzzles, does them quickly
Says things like "a clock - a circle"
Is starting to understand humor

I am just looking for some guidance on this subject, and I just want to make sure that he is provided with the environment he needs. He gets lots of play time with other children as well as on his own and with us. But he is very interested in learning and seems to prefer books etc. sometimes to other "normal" 24 month old activities. Will he be ok with going to a normal school or should we start thinking about a different type of school when the time comes? I was above average in reading, and my husband has an IQ of 146 and is fantastic with mathematics and engineering.

My son James does seem to be far more interested in letters and numbers than the other two year olds, but I don't want to miss the fact that he is a young child as well as an eager learner. Also don't want him to be labeled as "gifted" if he is just very intelligent as some sort of line seems to be crossed when that happens (how people treat the child, school issues etc..). I just need some guidance.

Thanks for your help!!

Cheers,
Lorraine

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I have wondered the same thing about my 2 year old (Mar 31). She seems very advanced, and everyone we know says so. She stays at home with me, so I think the one-on-one may have something to do with it. She recognizes the differences in numbers and letters, and can point most out, can say the alphabet and count to 15. She can recognize most colors. Most amazing to me is how well she talks, uses her manners, remembers single events, sometimes months afterwards, the list goes on and on. I was gifted, but my parents refused to develop my abilities and wanted me to lead a "normal" life. I guess I'll just have to wait until she gets school aged before we can tell if she is truly "gifted" or not.

Right now, she has the best gift of all: A mom who talks to her and plays with her, your attention has a lot to do with her development.

Luckyaliengirl,

I understand, my mom had no idea what to do with me even though the school told her I was bored and was very advanced in english and reading/comprehension. I pretty much hated school and now when I look back I can see that I would have been much happier learning at my own level. Since our kids are so young (too young to be assessed) all we can do is try to keep up with their enthusiasm for learning and make sure they get lots of love and time to play. My son has just turned 28 months and is like a little sponge, his love of learning is really refreshing! We are encouraging him to play with the other children more as he seems to prefer observing and talking to adults.

I can understand why your parents were hesitant to "develop" your abilities, but in the right environment gifted children will be happiest when allowed to learn and develop at their own pace as a opposed to the pace of the "school system". We are seriously considering a Montessori school when the time comes, I am concerned that if he ends up in "gifted" classes in a public school that he will be labeled and bullied. Montessori schools treat all children equally and allow them to go at their own personal pace, and are used to dealing with gifted and ungifted children. I wish my mom had been able to send me to a school like that! I was bullied in grade school because I was "different", and I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy! Worth considering...

Good luck!

Cheers,
Lorraine

It doesn't take an expert to at least advise you of one step to take: don't leave your kid at day-care.
You are the mom, be the mom. I have a feeling the day care lady can't provide what your child needs, even if they are an "expert". But hey, that's an opinion! Many others might tell you different out there these days.
Good luck!

Keep helping him to learn but my mother knows a family with two children both labeled as gifted at an early age and both of them find it hard or impossible to make new friends or face new environment without throwing tantrums (6 + 9), this is because the children were often kept alone learning things. I myself was labeled gifted at 8 or 9 but I didn't enjoy being taken out on my own.

Keep helping him learn but don't try and force him to live on brains alone, hep him be sociable and kep letting him play witjh other children, A good idea is too find a child slightly older or not who is also bright enough to keep with your son and have them play together often this will improve his sociability and could potentially be enducational for both of them.

The WIPPSI is designed for kids 2-5 I think (verbal). The WISC V is then used after that. Mirica Gross is a saint in the field of Gifted ed.

I certainly agree with the "Let them be kids" sentiment, you just provide access to what they need/ask for if you can.

The reference before by Tallarin to her friend's overscheduled children is not at all related to the children's giftedness but to a overzealous parents who definitely need to help their children learn about life-balance! And it should be noted that all the opportunities in the world does not MAKE a child gifted.

Instead of amateur advice from anonymous online posters (which are essentially meaningless) I think you need to look to the volumes of peer reviewed research for directions at times. The support of those who have been through similar things will also be valuable to you. You sound like you are on your way to becoming an expert in the field, which is the only way to effectively be your child's best advocate when he eventually does get to school.

Montessori is a fabulous environment/philosophy for gifted children. They too will need to be prepared for advanced development however, so be prepared to meet with them with "evidence" as well. The philosophy itself is very conducive to meeting the individual needs of children (no matter whether gifted or average or leering disabled). Most GT kids thrive in Montessori.

For now, enjoy him (as it sounds as though you are doing!). Time slips by all too fast and we never get it back again. Being prepared for what may lie ahead is terrific, and I am sure you will provide a warm secure and suitable world for your little man to thrive in. Just be a guide and a follower, listen to your heart, your instincts (they are so rarely wrong!). Most importantly listen to your son, he will be the one to tell you what is right and what is not - trust him.

... oh and I would recommend developing a thick skin against all those who judge you, who tell you that you are pushing your kids when you know you are not, all these who tell you different strategies do and don't work and all those who think you ar exaggerating skills and abilities... you know the truth, and mostly these people (while meaning well) are uninformed in the field (and the specifics of YOUR child) and it certainly brings to the fore people's own insecurities (albeit unconsciously no doubt). You know your kids better than anyone, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

LouB, Thank you for your helpful input as well as some of the input by other posters. I have been doing quite a bit of research lately and you are correct that comments by people who are uninformed are of no use to me. I guess when I posted the question I was under the impression that an "expert" would answer my question but as we can see there are no real experts answering these questions on this board. The heading "live answers from real experts" at the top of the board is quite misleading. I would not have bothered asking if I had known I would not be getting a reply from someone who has experience in this field professionally.

He is a great kid, and we are providing him with a loving secure home and plenty of different situations involving structured activities (a day care that is more like a pre-school), going to the park, playing with friends children, travelling etc. He is not in the least bothered about changes to his environment and is a happy content little guy. As you say, life-balance is very important and is something that quite a few people haven't quite learned yet.

I am going to continue to go by my instincts as you suggest, and read up on Mrica Gross (have heard about her, just need to get one of her books).

Thanks again...

Cheers,
Lorraine

In some ways the heading is right Lorraine... we are *all* experts if we trust our own instincts... but I can see what you mean.

Your little man is obviously very lucky... and adaptable! Modelling (as in habits, balance etc) is the best teaching a kid can get!

Are you in Australia by chance.. If so there are a few places to go for info (though you've probably already seen them if you've been on the resrach trail!). Miraca is Aussie, world renowned in her field and she works for GERRIC (aligned with University for New South Wales). There are other connections too, let me know of they could be of any use to you. I'm no expert either, just another parent who had to get informed.

Cheers,
Lou

Hi Lou,

Yes, we are currently living in Australia (Alice Springs) and will be relocating back to the US in a year or two. There is currently no support here in town for gifted children, and as every child is different it would have been nice to have access to someone who understands gifted children locally. There was a lady who did but she left a few months ago. So I am currently relying on internet research (helpful but too general). There are some fantastic interviews with Miraca available online which have been really helpful, especially in understanding what gifted children need as far as education. She really understands the misconceptions many people have about gifted children, and is very aware that in Australia there is a tendendcy to want/expect gifted children to be just like other children which doesn't help.

I think for my son the Montessori school will be the preferred option, there are many of them in the area where we will be living in the US. It appears that these schools provide your child interaction with other children of all abilities and allows them to learn at their own individual pace while avoiding being singled out. I was bullied a lot as a young child and it was really traumatic for me. Bullying is something I want to avoid for my child, and I am concerned that if he is in a regular public school and then pulled out for the "special" classes or programs that he will be a target for bullies.

I have seen the major websites dealing with gifted children (Hoagies Gifted, Gifted Children.com, etc) and all are quite helpful. I guess I will have to wait until we move out of Alice to get direct assistance and advice. My son will be about 4 years old when we go back to the US, hopefully we will have enough time to research schools and find the best one for him and get him in.

If you have any other info let me know, thanks for your help!

Cheers,
Lorraine

I thought I detected an Aussie accent ;)

The reason I asked (since I got the feeling you also wanted to know more in the field) is to let you know (if you didn't already!) that there are some fantastic local listserves that deal with gifted kids, in fact I owe a lot of what I leanred from parents and educators on those lists. The best (IMHO) can be accessed through giftedfamilies.org. These are all Aus families, parents and teachers. You can hang out and not post too - just soak up the info, or you can ask questions directly, they are extremely supportive. I'd recommend setting membership to digest as it can be quite a busy list at times (though not always). There's no advertising or anything crappy like that, it's free and easy. I can't remember anyone from Alice on there I could check? Just an idea anyhoo.

Good luck with your search, before you know it you will be an expert (and back here advising others I'll bet :p !)

Cheers,
Lou

Thanks again Lou! Will definitely check it out!

Cheers,
Lorraine : )

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Originally Posted by tonesbones

It doesn't take an expert to at least advise you of one step to take: don't leave your kid at day-care.
You are the mom, be the mom. I have a feeling the day care lady can't provide what your child needs, even if they are an "expert". But hey, that's an opinion! Many others might tell you different out there these days.
Good luck!

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I guess I'll just make another post to defend my last.


"LouB disagrees: what rubbish tonesbones, who are you to judge?"


I was saying, I'm not sure how you can a take a general statement like that and construe it as a judgment. I would have said the same thing to a one-legged swamp rat. "Rubbish" you say? I think it's great that this person has a gifted child, but gifted or not, kids need a mom. Let me point out, again, that this is my opinion and let LouB know that it doesn't take much to criticize another's opinion.

I could go into the lengthy and numerous ways in which your post could be contrued as insulting to people who have little choice but to use child care facilities... and quality ones as has been indicated by Rainrad what's more... though I do get the distinct feeling you may simply looking for a debate on the issue?

Perhaps I am "one of the many out there" who tells a different story. Quality early childhood education, especially for gifted kids, is essential in helping them find a sense of self and fulfillment. Until you know a gifted child's thirst to learn I postulate that you cannot understand how this comes to be. I understand it can seem counter-intuative to some to want to put their kids into daycare, or that daycare could actually provide something that parents can not, but fromexperience you need ot be careful about making some sweeping judgements and generalisations. All this coming from a committed Ap parent, who'd thought huh? Having a giftedchild certainly puts things into perspective about children's needs I can tell you that!

Many gifted kids need the stimulation of a quality early learning centre, and some need more than that. This is in no way to imply that any child shouldn't be loved and cared for at home with parents for as much time as possible/suitable. Every situation is different and to impart the advice of "don't *leave* your kid at daycare" is to deny that some parents actually chose this for a reason, and denigrates the decision of parents to make choices about their children's early learning experiences. It could potentially offend anyone who did not have a choice about their work arrangemenst also.

So again, I ask, who are you to judge?

Tonesbones,

With all due respect, I was not asking for anyone's opinion about whether my child should be going to the child care centre. I am not too interested in what you or anyone else thinks about my son going to a very good daycare 2 or 3 days a week. He loves going, and it provides him with opportunities I cannot give him at home. He also loves being home with us the other 4 or 5 days. There is such a thing as balance and moderation in life, I do not feel like my child needs to be with me 24 hours a day. Lou has hit the nail on the head. If you would like to answer my original question please do, but otherwise keep your opinion to yourself when you have not been asked for it.

Cheers,
Lorraine

Ok, truth be told, LouB did hit the nail on the head; but the only nail hit was that I am in this for the debate. I admit, it's entertaining to me. Hey, you post in a public forum, you're asking for my opinion. Unfortunately, you might just get an opinion that doesn't sit well with you for whatever reason. It apparently didn't sit well with either of you. The problem is, neither of you were able to tell me how a general statement like mine could be construed as a judgment. Yes, you tried to twist it around and tell me that it could be construed as insulting, but I didn't ask if you were insulted, I actually knew you'd be insulted when I first left the post! It was harsh but it was true! So, I'm sorry that you took offense. But let it be known, I still am of the opinion that children should not be left at day care, you sit there with your child, it no longer is day care. I have no idea about your situation, you could be an eye-less pirate (can't you tell I like this part?) for all I care. Until next time,
Tonus, the Bonus.

As I said before, I couldn't care less what your opinion is. I am not insulted, I make my own decisions for my own reasons and what you think is irrelevant. Since you are only interested in dabating, I will not answer any more of your posts. It is not worth my time.

Hi I'm Taylor I am a gifted student myself and would consider him "gifted" on the grounds that he is a two year old that likes reading and puzzles.I am a fith grader and am going to a gifted school and I was assessed that was how my intelligence was measured but don't
Agree about giving an IQ test to an infant.I also think that you should watch him as he further developes.If he continues to watch videos and do puzzles I would have him assessed,IF he continues.Some toddlers show characteristics of "gifted" and are dumbed- down as they grow.Make sure to keep his mind stimulated.I also think my little cousin (also 2) is gifted!Hope I helped you with your toddler.

Thank you for your help Taylor, as he is so young we will just make sure he has plenty to do that interests him as you mentioned. Thinking that a private school, maybe Montessori would be a good option in a couple of years when it is time to start school. Thank you for your suggestions!

RainRad2002: I know your post was quite some time ago but hopefully you are still able to see the answers to this post you have. I am having a similar issue with my 2 year old son and not quite sure what to do about it. Of course there isn't much information out there to guide you on what to do in this situation. My son exhibits the same abilities as your son at 2 years old and then some (I'm sure you didn't list everything he could do). My concern is that I was preferring to keep my son at home with me until pre-K at least and after realizing that his abilities weren't necessarily typical of other children his age I'm wondering if I should be doing more. I can't really afford a private school but don't want him to feel "out of place" somewhere else either. He's very social and I'm already seeing disappointment in his eyes when he walks up to other kids his age asking them to share his ball with him and saying Hi to everyone, he gets ignored even by adults. So carrying this into a typical preschool, I'm wondering if he will feel out of place and become withdrawn. My husband is "gifted" although he won't openly admit it, he was strongly discouraged in his family to carry on with the behavior and intelligence that came natural to him. Not sure where to go from here and wondering what came about with your son since this post? Clearly it's difficult to post something like this because people really don't understand. I'm also stuck on what to teach him next considering he already knows many things that apparently they don't learn or comprehend until age 4-5. I figure the next step is learning how to read because he understands the sounds of all the letters and can count up to 20 as well as having an extensive vocabulary and can speak in full sentences and have conversations, but he doesn't have the desire to do that and I will not push learning something by any means. I let him lead in that in that department. He brings flashcards and books to me and says "school time!", not the other way around. Any advice you can give would be so greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Hi I have a sone names James as well and his milestones are shocking us. At 24 months he does 63piece puzzles with ease, counts to fifty and is learning to read. He learned capital and lower case letter by 18 months. I can list many many more things. He is now 22 months and is obsessed with car logos. He knows over 40 of them. And learned them in two days. TWO days.
Incredible memory. And incredible thirst to learn. I do not push him too hard. I REPEAT, I do NOT push him. He genuinely wants to learn from the moment he wakes to the moment he sleeps.

We are interested in having him assessed.

All I want is to provide him with the care and education he requires.

I agree with Gumshoe.

Concerned mom,
Despina

Sorry about all my typos... writing too fast!

Hi. I am a stay at home mom with two children, ages 6 and 2. I found this as I was searching for information on my two year old daughter. I was also a "gifted" child. I was able to read from the Bible just after my fourth birthday, could count to 100 at 2 1/2 and knew my letters and numbers really early. I grew up in a rural school system that wasn't really equipped for gifted children. When I was tested to enter the first grade (I didn't attend Kindergarten), I scored at a third and fourth grade level. Out of fear, my parents kept me at my age level and didn't advance me. I had a lot of struggles in elementary school. I was very bored and was constantly in trouble for conduct.
Now I have a 25-month-old who knows her letters, numbers, shapes, and colors and I believe she is a gifted child. Luckily, I am homeschooling my six-year-old son this year because he was diagnosed with a learning disability at the end of his kindergarten year after we had him independently tested. We asked his school for testing, but the school did NOTHING and kept making excuses. Now he's making A's and B's because he is getting the one-on-one he needs to help him understand. I feel that homeschooling will be beneficial to both of my children because I will be able to give them an education based on their individual level and abilities. I have seen and heard about teachers who make the brighter ones teach the others or even ridicule them for knowing things. Either situation doesn't benefit the growth of the gifted child. I never thought that I would be a home-school mom; however, now I think it's going to be crucial for both my children so they can reach their full potential and not allow anyone to limit what they can become. I know homeschooling is a hard choice and it's scary (and not everyone can or should do it). We are doing an online public school called K12, so we have help from a teacher and a support system. I wish you and your daughter well. Good luck to both of us! :)

While reading your post, I thought you were describing my 25-month old son. I'm a speech-language pathologist and new something was "different" at around 10 months. He knew his alphabet (upper and lower case), numbers 1-30, shapes, colours (even tan, beige, light blue, dark blue, etc.) at 19 months. He knows all of his concepts and knew all the planets in the solar system before 23 months of age. He would much rather entertain adults than children. He'd rather watch educational videos any day and wants to know what items such as nuts, bolts, constellations, comets, stethescope, barometer, calculator, etc. are instead of your basic noum and verbs. His communication is at par with typical peers and his socialization appears to be within normal limits. At 20 minths, he was given a "provisional" diagnosis of high functioning autism,by a leading researcher in the country. We are working with a ton of professionals on this. Forget trying to put him in a "gifted" program. He needs to learn how to play and socialize with his peers in an appropriate manner as these skills are just as if not even more important for his development. Now, he just needs to be a kid.

My granddaughter must be gifted too then as she does all these things you have listed and more and she is 17 months old. It is just her and I home all day. She also can dribble a ball and also color pictures (outside the lines too of course) she mimics ballet she sees on TV as well, counts to 10 knows by sight to 10, knows alphabet by sight , reads small words etc.