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    Topherisa's Avatar
    Topherisa Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 13, 2012, 12:20 PM
    Relinquish parental rights child support
    We found about two years ago that my husband had a daughter from a long time ago girlfriend. When this girlfriend found out that he had married and had children she decided to file the child support papers. We have paid the child support however my husband would like to relinquish his rights and cease the child support. We feel that the xgirlfriend is just trying to cause strife in our marriage. The child is now 15 she does not call my husband or email him and when he attempts to call she wants nothing to do with him however the child's mother always seems to be able to pick a fight for no good reason. We sent his daughter christmas gifts and the child's mother stated that they were garbage and she didn't want them But according to the child's mother she asks why her dad doesn't call more. Is it possible to reliquish rights and stop child support?
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #2

    Apr 13, 2012, 12:25 PM
    You could find her someone to marry and get them to adopt the girl. Otherwise its not going to happen.

    There is this sticky you should read from the Family Law forum.

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family...st-116098.html
    Topherisa's Avatar
    Topherisa Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Apr 13, 2012, 12:38 PM
    This stinks so basically he is being forced to pay for a child that wants nothing to do with him because her mother was being sheisty and only was looking out for herself. Not for their daughter. I feel bad for her my husband would love to get to know her but because of her mothers stupidity he cant. She waited for 13 years of this child life to try and make contact. My husbands parents have always had the same address she could have mailed something a letter a note a picture anything but she didn't she instead chose to move to another state and now that she found out that he married and has kids she is causing drama. This Sucks royally
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
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    #4

    Apr 13, 2012, 12:52 PM
    If the main issue is the child's feelings and actions, what has he done to give her a chance to get to know him? Other than e-mails and phone calls has your husband made any attempts at getting to know his child? Has he had any visitation with her? Has he met her face-to-face?

    Other than her mother, how do you know what the child is wanting? If the mother is causing issues for you and your husband, what do you think she is telling the child? Could the child feel torn over wanting to know her father and loyalty to her mother?

    Besides child support, are there any other court rulings such as visitation?

    Instead of seeking to terminate his responsibility, what if he embraced it and went to court for visitation? Would you be able to handle that thought?
    Topherisa's Avatar
    Topherisa Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Apr 13, 2012, 01:21 PM
    He has attempted to get to know her. They recently visited his parents home and my mother in law made her a birthday cake and had invited my husband and I over. I chose not to go because I wanted to give him the oppurtunity to get to see her first. Well needless to say she was not wanting anything to do with him. He stated that he would like for her to come over the next day to look at some pictures and have a bbq with just himself and his parents and she stated that she didn't want to. She even told her mother not to call her father anymore and that if she did she would hang up in his face. I would have no issue with her coming to visit I have even suggested this to him however he is reluctant especially because of what has recently occurred. Her mother is wanting this for her daughter more than anything. I personally grew up in a situation similar to this and I made the effort to get to know my father he on the other hand did not want anything to do with me. My husband has truly tried he has even gone to the extent of sending her a cell phone that she can call him on so her mother won't be involved and to this day she just uses it to call her friends. I know because I pay the bill on it monthly. He is tired of trying and feels that if she wants nothing to do with him then he can make that happen.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #6

    Apr 13, 2012, 04:03 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Topherisa View Post
    This stinks so basically he is being forced to pay for a child that wants nothing to do with him
    Sorry, but that's what happens when you decide to have sex with someone. Frankly, I empathize with your husband, but only to a certain extent. If he didn't want to get stuck supporting a child he should have kept it in his pants. He is dealing with the consequences of a bad decision, but he HAS to deal with them.

    I feel sorry that the mother has alienated his daughter so she wants nothing to do with him. But I don't feel sorry that he has to support this daughter.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #7

    Apr 13, 2012, 04:25 PM
    What is wrong about having to pay for a child's expense and cost. He needs to pay, and it does not matter if he can visit or not, He is responsible for paying the cost of a child he brought into the world.

    If he needs to deal with visits he goes back to court over that. Actually wanting to do that, is what most refer to as a "dead beat dad" who has no desire to care for their child.

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