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-   -   I am a non biological father, what are my rights (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=560756)

  • Mar 10, 2011, 06:18 PM
    JudyKayTee

    I am tangled up with the mother signed "the consent" and apparently didn't object. Consent to what? Object to what? Did the OP ADOPT this child? Obtain guardianship? Something in between?

    It can't be some sort of custody agreement because the mother and OP KNEW he wasn't the natural father.

    He's on the birth certificate but both parties KNEW he wasn't the biological father? Now the biological father is stepping in? Based on what? DNA testing? Guessing? Mother and OP came to some sort of agreement which required consent but never included the person they may have known was the natural father?

    I see a lot of tap dancing going on here to go around and/or under the Law.
  • Mar 10, 2011, 09:38 PM
    allenkes
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    I don't need to explain everything that is going on. Believe me ain't no tap dancing going on here. Everything is out in the open but this dude has not made any attempts to step it up until now. Mama signed the paperwork my lawyer drew up ten years ago. The biological "person" was nowhere to be found. I had my reasons for seeking custody back then. My lawyer explained to me that as long as she did not say I wasn't the father I would receive custody. I found out almost two years after the baby was born that she was not mine. I signed the birth certificate with the thought she was mine. I swore I mentioned that. The biological father was nowhere to be found in those days. You make it sound like I did all this to be shady, which is a bunch of BS. I took this child and raised her for 15 years and developed something good. I've already talked to someone and your way off. Thanks anyway.
  • Mar 10, 2011, 11:32 PM
    JudyKayTee

    PAPERWORK FOR WHAT?

    If the lawyer explained to you that as long as she did not say you were not the father you would get custody - ? Then the Attorney advised you to commit fraud and that Attorney should be reported to the Bar Association.

    I'm going to respond to your tone with a similar tone - if you had played by the rules when the mother signed the consent for whatever she consented to you wouldn't be in this position today.

    As far as I can tell you committed a fraud. You stole this child from the biological father.

    BS or not BS, that's how it's shaping up. Did the "someone" you talked to explain to you that you signed papers fraudulently in an attempt to mislead the Court - or did you leave that part of the story out?

    And you're welcome anyway.
  • Mar 11, 2011, 04:46 AM
    ScottGem

    First, let me say to allen, that I think we sympathize with your plight here. You have stepped up to take care of a child when you didn't have to and have done so for that child's lifetime. You are to be lauded for that. To have that child wrenched from you at this point would be a travesty of justice In my opinion.

    But the law is not always just. And judges don't always have leeway to bend the law.

    The problem here is that you (or your lawyer) screwed up when you split with the mother. You both counted on the bio father staying out of the picture. And that decision is coming back to haunt you. If you were aware that you were not the child's bio father then you did, as Judy said commit a fraud on the court. And that is going to work against you. What you should have done is adopt the child, not just ask for custody. But you didn't and your and your daughter may now suffer for those bad decisions.

    I hope this doesn't happen and I would fight with every resource you have. But we answer questions with reality here. And the reality is the law in your area favors the bio parent very heavily. The reality is that you skirted (at the least) the law when you took custody. You are going to have to deal with those realities.
  • Mar 11, 2011, 04:54 AM
    joypulv
    Comment on joypulv's post
    I give up, I defer
  • Mar 11, 2011, 05:41 AM
    GV70

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by joypulv View Post
    Comment on joypulv's post
    I give up, I defer

    I want to have right to comment my own posts,too:eek:;)
  • Mar 11, 2011, 07:04 AM
    allenkes
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    The reason I react the way I do is because of the passion and commitment I have. You say I stole this child. What if I told you the child has spent a significant amounts of time over the years with the biological father. He had plenty of opportunities to step up but didn't. In the eyes of the law, you can paint me as the bad guy. Believe me when I tell you if you were to meet with both of us you would have a different opinion. You can say I committed fraud, like I said a lot of things went down that shouldn't of. Legally I should have handled things differently and I can't change that now but like everything else I will do what I have to. Like I said I have some things in the works. The other thing is he may not even follow through. He hasn't done it yet. Only time will tell.I don't mean to come off as a jerk but when I feel I'm being pushed I don't take kindly to it. As things settle down I firmly believe I may have over reacted to the threat.
  • Mar 11, 2011, 07:22 AM
    allenkes
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    To answer you question of misleading the court, I give every detail to who I am speaking with, I have nothing to hide. I could go on and on with this but it's pointless at this time. This whole scenario is complex and involved and shouldn't be upset about the responses, I guess I forgot that's why I posed the question.
  • Mar 11, 2011, 07:27 AM
    allenkes
    Comment on ScottGem's post
    Oh, I understand the realities of the situation. I react the way I do about this because of the passion I have put into creating a life for her. Yeah, I did and gave up a lot but I didn't think about that. When a person says that I stole a child without all the intimate details that upsets me. I did not post the question to have some attack me because up to this point I have not been attacked. I have been questioned, which is fine but to come at me like I'm the bad guy puts me in a place I do not want to be. As far as the law, being naïve may come back but I don't think anything will happpen. This guy has a rep for being aloud mouth and I may have over reacted. I can tell you I did make numerous attempts for her to be with her biological family. For the most part everything worked out well. I do appreciate the info given and I do honestly believe nothing will take place. I guess the reason I got upset is being painted as a fraud and thief. How would anyone react to that?
  • Mar 11, 2011, 08:33 AM
    JudyKayTee

    You asked for legal options - that's what you got. I am addressing you from a legal standpoint, advising you what you may very well face in Court.

    I answered based on what you posted. I have no way of knowing the "behind the scenes" info unless you post it.

    I still don't know what the mother signed, how or why. Hopefully the Court will find this out.
  • Mar 11, 2011, 09:09 AM
    allenkes
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    You're right. Trying to not flip out is a problem. I will have to dig up the papers to see if I can find your answer.
  • Mar 11, 2011, 10:05 AM
    joypulv
    Comment on GV70's post
    I defer to you. I hit the wrong box. My $1 mouse isn't working most of the time.

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