Ask Me Help Desk - Paternal rights

I am 33 years old, My mother told me that I didn't ask to come into this world. So she will provide for me any way she can. I wasn't asked if I wanted a kid so therefore she should be responsible for him. However he is here and I feel I should be in control of my ex. My father raised me that the man she be in control of his woman at all times. I want to be able to teach my son to grow up to be A good man and don't think any women can teach him how to be a man.

Quote:

Originally Posted by davidcjones

I am 33 years old, My mother told me that i didnt ask to come into this world. so she will provide for me any way she can. I wasnt asked if I wanted a kid so therefore she should be responsible for him. However he is here and I feel I should be in control of my ex. My father raised me that the man she be in control of his woman at all times. I want to be able to teach my son to grow up to be A good man and dont think any women can teach him how to be a man.

So your mother is an enabler and your father is an abusive control freak and this qualifies you to be a parent?

You cannot teach your son how to be a man... you have no idea.

Well thanks for your replies. I am going to take it all in and come up with a resolution on my own since no one here seems to side with me. I quess this whole problem is my parents fault because of them and all the other stupid people in the world I can't live the way I want. Like I have already said I didn't ask for any of this.

Quote:

Originally Posted by davidcjones

Well thanks for your replies. I am going to take it all in and come up with a resolution on my own since no one here seems to side with me. I quess this whole problem is my parents fault because of them and all the other stupid people in the world I can't live the way I want. Like I have already said I didnt ask for any of this.

No, you didn't ask for any of it. But here is a freebie for you on your road to realization...

A real man doesn't complain about why things are the way they are... he just deals with them like a man.

So far you are not.

And you can live the way you want so long as it complies with the law. Currently you are not complying with the law.

Boy (and I do mean boy), do you need help. The first thing you need to do is take responsibility for your actions. YOU chose to have sex with the mother of your child! YOU chose to drive drunk! YOU chose fight with a court officer! These were all choices YOU made, not your mother, not your father, not the mother of your child.

Yes, your parents may have enabled your behaviour, but you are 33 yrs old. Don't you think its time to grow up? You won't grow up if you continue to blame everyone but yourself.

I don't see any reason for anyone here to "side" with you, because you are wrong about just about everything. We are not here to side with you, we are here to provide the best quality answers and advice in response to your questions. And that's what you have gotten.

Do with that advice what you will, but until you grow up you will not be a fit father for your child.

I have to add one more thing. We have had many people ask questions here, but you are probably one of the most unsympathetic posters I can recall. I would like to tell you to stay out of your child's life but my principles prevent me from doing so. I am committed to give you the best advice I can and have done so. I sincerely hope you take it for your sale and your childs's.

I stopped reading right after you blamed your ex for the person you've become and then went onto say that a man should be in control and that a woman couldn't possibly teach your son to be a good man, you'd have to do that.
So let me ask you, what makes you a good man? Are you a good man for beating your son? NO. are you a good man for telling your son to lie with the dogs? NO. are you a good man for hitting an officer? NO. are you a good man for haing even 1 DUI? NO. wow. The answer always seems to be NO. and you can't even take responsibility for your actions. Shame on you, blaming her. Now how exactly are you going to be a good influence on your son? You sound like scum.

I can't add much more to all that's been said on here but to say I agree with all the answers/advice.

How sad that this boy is supposed to just wait it out until his dad gets his s**t together.

If you had any father potential in you, you wouldn't be blaming anyone for your situation, first of all. You would get your sorry a** into a parenting class and for pete's sake pay your child support so your son has what he needs.

As you spend your time trying to sober up, in and out of jail, and having your pity party, your son is growing up without you and his mother is struggling to do it ALL on her own.

I guess it would be okay if your son winds up in jail someday and blames it on you, the man.

I don't believe for a minute you came to this website seeking legal advice on your rights to be in your son's life. You're here because you want to find out how to "win". That's what it's all about. Your ex got one up on you, huh? Honestly, you make me sick.