Ask Me Help Desk - Visitation

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useritson

Ok im sure it does not smart guy!But what does?

I'm done with you. Bye.

Quote:

Originally Posted by cadillac59

I'm done with you. Bye.

Wow your getting mad at me and you are the one being smart with me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useritson

Wow your getting mad at me and you are the one being smart with me.

No, Cadillac, has been trying to help you, but you have not been helping him to do so.

What you posted is not some official, legally proscribed document. That's what he has been trying to get through to you. Generally, a visitation schedule is not that specific, though sometimes it can be. Since you CHOSE to move 3.5 hours away a daily schedule is impractical. And since the child is so young, overnights may also be impractical at this time.

So you may need to set a schedule where you see her for a few hours once a week. As she gets older you can go for alternate weeks until she start school, then you can go for alternate weekends. You can build these things into the court order.

The second part of your question is that you need to have a court order custody, support and visitation. The court apparently told you to try and work something out that you both can agree to. It seems that you were unable to do so so you now need to go to court for a hearing where you will each present your case as to custody and visitation. The judge will then rule according to what the court feels is the best interests of the child.

I would advise you to get an attorney to help you prepare the petitions and motions to submit to the court. Especially if the mother has an attorney to represent her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottGem

No, Cadillac, has been trying to help you, but you have not been helping him to do so.

What you posted is not some official, legally proscribed document. That's what he has been trying to get through to you. Generally, a visitation schedule is not that specific, though sometimes it can be. Since you CHOSE to move 3.5 hours away a daily schedule is impractical. And since the child is so young, overnights may also be impractical at this time.

So you may need to set a schedule where you see her for a few hours once a week. As she gets older you can go for alternate weeks until she start school, then you can go for alternate weekends. You can build these things into the court order.

The second part of your question is that you need to have a court order custody, support and visitation. The court apparently told you to try and work something out that you both can agree to. It seems that you were unable to do so so you now need to go to court for a hearing where you will each present your case as to custody and visitation. The judge will then rule according to what the court feels is the best interests of the child.

I would advise you to get an attorney to help you prepare the petitions and motions to submit to the court. Especially if the mother has an attorney to represent her.

I was told that you guys hate to be wrong!Its like why did he not just say that what you just told me!Like you just gave me what I wanted to know!I have talked to a few lawers and
They told me when she starts to eat food there is a good way to get her for a least one weekend a mouth!But he could have said something like not it's this way or no that's not right and since you Since you CHOSE to move 3.5 hours away no he was just saying to words and now he was trying to help no damn way!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useritson

I was told that you guys hate to be wrong!Its like why did he not just say that what you just told me!Like you just gave me what I wanted to know!I have talked to a few lawers and
They told me when she starts to eat food there is a good way to get her for a least one weekend a mouth!But he could have said something like not it's this way or no thats not right and since you Since you CHOSE to move 3.5 hours away no he was just saying to words and now he was trying to help no damn way!

You are getting help for free and you choose to question the manner in which it is given? If you don't like how a PROFESSIONAL LAWYER is giving you FREE help, go pay someone to give it to you like you want it.

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Originally Posted by stevetcg

You are getting help for free and you choose to question the manner in which it is given? If you dont like how a PROFESSIONAL LAWYER is giving you FREE help, go pay someone to give it to you like you want it.

Oh OK I see because it's free that's it sorry and thank you for all your help!

Oops.

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Originally Posted by Justwantfair

Oops.

What happen you here to to take there side too!It's free so they can act like a .

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useritson

What happen you here to to take there side too!It's free so they can act like a .

It's not about sides, but your attitude is very defensive and disrespectful.

It won't do you well in court and it won't do you well in parenting.

People are here to help, I didn't read anything to be defensive about.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

It's not about sides, but your attitude is very defensive and disrespectful.

It won't do you well in court and it won't do you well in parenting.

People are here to help, I didn't read anything to be defensive about.

Lol!man my friend just told me this and he is saying let it go because you will get baned trying to tell the experts anything.I mean read how I was asking I did not have a attitude then ScottGem tell me what I wanted to know right off the bat!Yeah I could go and pay for a lawyer who only take your money when all you need to know what you are doing .But come on he was trying to be smart about but if I was being smart to him then you guys still would have tried ban me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useritson

Lol!man my friend just told me this and he is saying let it go because you will get baned trying to tell the experts anything.I mean read how I was asking I did not have a attitude then ScottGem tell me what I wanted to know right off the bat!Yeah I could go and pay for a lawyer who only take your money when all you need to know what you are doing .But come on he was trying to be smart about but if I was being smart to him then you guys still would have tried ban me.

But I just want to let it go because you guys might not have had your coffee and donuts today and I want to ask the nice guy that was telling something good so you are right!

Quote:

Originally Posted by cadillac59

If you don't agree on a custody/ visitation order you have to go to mediation before the judge can make a decision (no trial before mediation) if you are in California. You said you are in CA, which is California, correct?

Hey sorry about yesterday man I did not mean to get you mad I was think you were someone else!I see that you gave me the right answer the first time I was wrong about the way that I was acting!

You don't seem to get it... this isn't about arguing with an expert or right or wrong... this is about being disrespectful and arrogant to someone who is freely giving their time to try to help you.

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevetcg

You dont seem to get it... this isnt about arguing with an expert or right or wrong... this is about being disrespectful and arrogant to someone who is freely giving their time to try to help you.

I already said sorry to him I was wrong about it!I seen that he told me the right thing from the start!

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottGem

No, Cadillac, has been trying to help you, but you have not been helping him to do so.

What you posted is not some official, legally proscribed document. That's what he has been trying to get through to you. Generally, a visitation schedule is not that specific, though sometimes it can be. Since you CHOSE to move 3.5 hours away a daily schedule is impractical. And since the child is so young, overnights may also be impractical at this time.

So you may need to set a schedule where you see her for a few hours once a week. As she gets older you can go for alternate weeks until she start school, then you can go for alternate weekends. You can build these things into the court order.

The second part of your question is that you need to have a court order custody, support and visitation. The court apparently told you to try and work something out that you both can agree to. It seems that you were unable to do so so you now need to go to court for a hearing where you will each present your case as to custody and visitation. The judge will then rule according to what the court feels is the best interests of the child.

I would advise you to get an attorney to help you prepare the petitions and motions to submit to the court. Especially if the mother has an attorney to represent her.

So you are saying that overnights won't happen till she is like 6 years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useritson

So you are saying that overnights won't happen till she is like 6 years

No - overnights usually won't occur for the first year or so of the child's life if the mother is breastfeeding. Also, depending on the age of the child when visits start, visitation might work on a sliding effect. I.E 2 hours, twice a week for the first 3 months, 4 hours twice a week for the next 3, 1 night and 3 hours for the following...

That's just to give you an idea of what CAN happen. This all gets sussed out in mediation.

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevetcg

No - overnights usually wont occur for the first year or so of the child's life if the mother is breastfeeding. Also, depending on the age of the child when visits start, visitation might work on a sliding effect. I.E 2 hours, twice a week for the first 3 months, 4 hours twice a week for the next 3, 1 night and 3 hours for the following...

Thats just to give you an idea of what CAN happen. This all gets sussed out in mediation.

Thanks man!! Im cool with that but will I get to tell how bad I think it is we we are together
When me and her are around the kids we I'm in mediation

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useritson

Thanks man!!!Im cool with that but will I get to tell how bad I think it is we we are together
When me and her are around the kids we im in mediation

Im not sure I understand your question.

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Originally Posted by stevetcg

Im not sure I understand your question.

Will it's hard to go over to her house to see our baby when I'm there!I don't think it's healthy because she still not ready to come to terms with this being are baby so can I tell this stuff when I'm in there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevetcg

Im not sure I understand your question.

I just want to say what I think is the problem in mediation