I live in California and my question is this... I have had Guardianship of my brother for 3 years now after our mom passed away, he's 14yrs old .His father was in Jail for I don't remember how many years. But he had gotten out in mid 2008.. so a few months after our mom passed away. He's been in and out of jail throughout his life so he has a pretty long record. And he's on probation now.

I've been supporting my brother since then and his father only pops around every couple of months to see him. To bring him a couple of new clothes or new shoes then he disappears again and we don't see him for another couple of months. Yet he swears up and down he's done sooo much for him.

Now he's being ordered to pay child support and now ALL OF A SUDDEN his father wants to tell them he lives with him so he doesn't have to pay child support. My brother prefers to live with me. Do I have any rights as having Guardianship of my brother? Can his father just come in after all this time of him living with me and just take him all because he doesn't want to pay child support? That's just so low of his father to want to do that. I don't want his child support! I don't want any money from him! We are doing fine without him in our lives.

But if he does that can I take him to court or would/will he have to take me to court because I'm not just going to "give up" my brother to him because he's a dead beat and refuses to pay child support and his bright idea is to claim my Bro lives with him. We have a settlement conference next month to discuss "a fair and reasonable" amount. What can I expect at the settlement conference, if they ask who's my brother living with his father is going to claim he's living with him and that's not true.

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Originally Posted by Meca311

I live in California and my question is this... I have had Guardianship of my brother for 3 years now after our mom passed away, he's 14yrs old .His father was in Jail for I don't remember how many years. But he had gotten out in mid 2008.. so a few months after our mom passed away. He's been in and out of jail throughout his life so he has a pretty long record. And he's on probation now.

I've been supporting my brother since then and his father only pops around every couple of months to see him. To bring him a couple of new clothes or new shoes then he disappears again and we don't see him for another couple of months. Yet he swears up and down he's done sooo much for him.

Now he's being ordered to pay child support and now ALL OF A SUDDEN his father wants to tell them he lives with him so he doesn't have to pay child support. My brother prefers to live with me. Do I have any rights as having Guardianship of my brother? can his father just come in after all this time of him living with me and just take him all because he doesn't want to pay child support? That's just so low of his father to want to do that. I don't want his child support! I don't want any money from him! we are doing fine without him in our lives.

But if he does that can I take him to court or would/will he have to take me to court because i'm not just going to "give up" my brother to him because he's a dead beat and refuses to pay child support and his bright idea is to claim my Bro lives with him. We have a settlement conference next month to discuss "a fair and reasonable" amount. What can I expect at the settlement conference, if they ask who's my brother living with his father is going to claim he's living with him and that's not true.

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How old are you? If you have legal guardianship that the court granted you, then the father will most likely not be awarded custody because it would create a definite upset in the child's life. However, if there is no court order, then you have no right to keep the child.

If there is a court order, I wouldn't worry about it. You'll be able to show the child is living with you and if it comes down to it, he is old enough to meet with a guardian ad litem.

Parents lie to the court all the time to try and get their way; you should have seen some of the things my husband's exwife said about him and I this year when she was trying to get their kids back.

I'm 29yrs old. We have to go on the 11TH to meet with a child support attorney to discuss our financial situation and come to something fair and reasonable. His father isn't working he's getting unemployment benefits

He said he's going to say he lives with him so they don't mess his money up. What kind of sh!t is that? It's a settlement conference at the superior court of CA

You still haven't answered my question. How were you awarded guardianship? If it wasn't done legally and through the court, you don't have any claim to keep your brother. My assumption is that is was done correctly, as you're discussing child support - if you didn't have the legal right to keep the child, I'm sure they wouldn't even be talking to you anymore.

It doesn't matter if he's working or not. If they order him to pay support, he has to pay it regardless of what his income is.

And if the only thing he's saying is that the child lives with him, I'd consider yourself lucky. My husband was accused of being physically abusive and I was accused of leaving three children unattended for hours on end. Nice, isn't it?

I was awarded Guardianship at the court in front of the judge. Our mom passed away, he was in Jail, it was the common sense thing to do.

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Originally Posted by Meca311

I was awarded Guardianship at the court in front of the judge. Our mom passed away, he was in Jail, it was the common sense thing to do.

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I agree with you completely. Sounds like the kid's dad is a real doofus. I wouldn't worry about it. Stick to fact, prove what you can because court always boils down to proof.

Thank you so much for your opinion and help I greatly appreciate it!

No problem; let us know how everything works out! :)

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Originally Posted by Meca311

I live in California and my question is this... I have had Guardianship of my brother for 3 years now after our mom passed away, he's 14yrs old .His father was in Jail for I don't remember how many years. But he had gotten out in mid 2008.. so a few months after our mom passed away. He's been in and out of jail throughout his life so he has a pretty long record. And he's on probation now.

I've been supporting my brother since then and his father only pops around every couple of months to see him. To bring him a couple of new clothes or new shoes then he disappears again and we don't see him for another couple of months. Yet he swears up and down he's done sooo much for him.

Now he's being ordered to pay child support and now ALL OF A SUDDEN his father wants to tell them he lives with him so he doesn't have to pay child support. My brother prefers to live with me. Do I have any rights as having Guardianship of my brother? can his father just come in after all this time of him living with me and just take him all because he doesn't want to pay child support? That's just so low of his father to want to do that. I don't want his child support! I don't want any money from him! we are doing fine without him in our lives.

But if he does that can I take him to court or would/will he have to take me to court because i'm not just going to "give up" my brother to him because he's a dead beat and refuses to pay child support and his bright idea is to claim my Bro lives with him. We have a settlement conference next month to discuss "a fair and reasonable" amount. What can I expect at the settlement conference, if they ask who's my brother living with his father is going to claim he's living with him and that's not true.

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There is no settlement conference as your describing. Also there is no such thing as fair and reasonable amount. What it sounds like your going to do is set the child support amounts. California already has a guideline and it called a dissomaster. The numbers go in and that is what the NCP pays. That is all there is to it. You can agree to a different amount but if it falls short of the guideline (dissomaster) then you will have to explain it to the judge.

The only point of contention is the time spent with the father. As of now your making the claim that he will be claiming the child lives with him. So bring proof. Like school records etc. They should have YOUR address on them. Bring anything you may need to prove he lives with you.

Also you better read your paperwork as you might be heading into mediation prior to the setting of the support issue so the proper figures can be put into the dissomaster.

I'm curious here. Who is ordering him to pay support and where did that come from. You said that you didn't care about support so I assume you didn't initiate it.

But I agree with This8384, since you have court ordered legal guardianship its unlikely he will win custody.

P.S. Please don't use the comments feature for followups. Use the Answer options instead.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

I'm curious here. Who is ordering him to pay support and where did that come from. You said that you didn't care about support so I assume you didn't initiate it.

But I agree with This8384, since you have court ordered legal guardianship its unlikely he will win custody.

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My guess is her brother is receiving some form of state assistance and now that the father is no longer incarcerated, the state is looking to him to start supporting his child.

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Originally Posted by this8384

My guess is her brother is receiving some form of state assistance and now that the father is no longer incarcerated, the state is looking to him to start supporting his child.

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That would be my GUESS. But I'd rather wait for the OP to answer.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

That would be my GUESS. But I'd rather wait for the OP to answer.

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Okie doke then.

So I went to the settlement conference with my bros dad and they have ordered him to pay $300 in child support. When I got home my bros dad called me cussing and fussing at me and still is trying to make my bro go live with him so he doesn't have to pay the child support. I told the child support attorney that I didn't want his child support but that guy didn't want to hear it. And says that he must pay.

So now I have my bros dad still threatening and harassing us "oh you gonna fight me on this huh". Well duh, I have legal guardianship of my bro since our moms passing in 07 and while he was in jail. My bro doesn't want to live with his dad because he knows to that his dad only wants him so he doesn't have to pay child support. And talks about how his dad doesn't even spend quality time with him, only comes around when he wants to pop by with a piece of clothing.

Hid dad is on probation too, so I would think he'd have some common sense and leave us alone. I called the police and they told me to call the social worker so I will do that in hopes it will make that man leave us alone.

It's a shame he only wants his son so he doesn't have to pay child support. I never wanted things to get this bad but his dad is a real jacka$$ and wouldn't let me explain anything. As my bros legal guardian I have the right to fight for my bro against his dad right? I'm 29 in CA and my bro is 14yrs old.

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Originally Posted by Meca311

So i went to the settlement conference with my bros dad and they have ordered him to pay $300 in child support. When i got home my bros dad called me cussing and fussing at me and still is trying to make my bro go live with him so he doesn't have to pay the child support. I told the child support attorney that i didn't want his child support but that guy didn't want to hear it. And says that he must pay.

So now i have my bros dad still threatening and harassing us "oh you gonna fight me on this huh". Well duh, i have legal guardianship of my bro since our moms passing in 07 and while he was in jail. My bro doesn't want to live with his dad because he knows to that his dad only wants him so he doesn't have to pay child support. And talks about how his dad doesn't even spend quality time with him, only comes around when he wants to pop by with a piece of clothing.

Hid dad is on probation too, so i would think he'd have some common sense and leave us alone. I called the police and they told me to call the social worker so i will do that in hopes it will make that man leave us alone.

It's a shame he only wants his son so he doesn't have to pay child support. I never wanted things to get this bad but his dad is a real jacka$$ and wouldn't let me explain anything. As my bros legal guardian i have the right to fight for my bro against his dad right? i'm 29 in CA and my bro is 14yrs old.

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Back to the original question: if you don't want child support, who initiated it? Is your brother receiving any form of financial assistance from the state? If he is, then the state WILL go after the parent(s) for child support - regardless of whether you want it.

What is he doing to threaten you? Obviously, he's going to have a hissy fit and say "his" child should come live with him because he doesn't want to pay child support - but that doesn't constitute a threat.

The only way you'd have to "fight" for custody of your brother is if the father takes the time to file a motion with the court. If he wastes the time doing that, he's not going to win - you clearly are a better place for the child to be.

If the dad is on probation then you are better off calling his probation officer rather than the social worker. Or call both.

Yes my brother is getting cash aid and food stamps. So they are the ones making him pay. He said the money would go into an account for my brother. Which is fine with me because I do not want anything from that man. The way he threatens us is by bullying and cussing us out over the phone and coming to my home cussing at my brother and bullying him. Intimidating my brother, my brother is afraid of him and does not want to live with him. He's old enough and understands and knows his dad has not done anything dad worthy for him and see's that his dad is only trying to make him live with him so he doesn't have to pay child support.

That's all his dad cussed at me about over the phone, he did not want to hear a thing about me having legal guardianship and my rights as his guardian he yells and talks over me, does not talk to me like an adult. He even hung up in my face and told me I don't got nothing. It was all "child support, child support.. i'm not paying child support"

He's been ordered to pay the $300, he told me if I can find a way where he doesn't have to pay, everything would be OK. How low. I don't know what else to do, I wish I knew who his probation officer was so I can call. The only thing I feel I can do is call the police if he shows up at my home trying to snatch my brother out of his comfort zone. I told my brother not to go anywhere with him if he was to go up to his school to see him, or see's him walking along the sidewalk. I know that would be kidnapping.

All in all we just wish he would leave us alone! If he wants to take me to court, I'm ready. But with him being on probation I don't know how far he might go. I want to do what's in the best interest of my bother. My Brother is happy here with me.

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Originally Posted by Meca311

Yes my brother is getting cash aid and food stamps. So they are the ones making him pay. He said the money would go into an account for my brother. Which is fine with me because I do not want anything from that man. The way he threatens us is by bullying and cussing us out over the phone and coming to my home cussing at my brother and bullying him. Intimidating my brother, my brother is afraid of him and does not want to live with him. He's old enough and understands and knows his dad has not done anything dad worthy for him and see's that his dad is only trying to make him live with him so he doesn't have to pay child support.

That's all his dad cussed at me about over the phone, he did not want to hear a thing about me having legal guardianship and my rights as his guardian he yells and talks over me, does not talk to me like an adult. He even hung up in my face and told me i don't got nothing. It was all "child support, child support.. i'm not paying child support"

He's been ordered to pay the $300, he told me if i can find a way where he doesn't have to pay, everything would be ok. How low. I don't know what else to do, i wish i knew who his probation officer was so i can call. The only thing i feel i can do is call the police if he shows up at my home trying to snatch my brother out of his comfort zone. I told my brother not to go anywhere with him if he was to go up to his school to see him, or see's him walking along the sidewalk. I know that would be kidnapping.

All in all we just wish he would leave us alone!! If he wants to take me to court, i'm ready. But with him being on probation i don't know how far he might go. I want to do what's in the best interest of my bother. My Brother is happy here with me.

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It's not going to happen - he can cuss at you all he wants. The courts are not going to give him custody of the child, nor are they going to let him out of the financial obligation of supporting his own child.

You should be able to call the P.O.'s office and ask to speak to the officer handling his case; I've done it before. Give them as much info as you can: name, address, date of birth, etc. They can usually find who you need to talk to.

Does he have court-ordered visitation of any kind? If not, I'd stop answering the phone and the door. If the court hasn't given him rights, you're under no obligation to put up with the harassment.

That's what I'll do, call the P.O.'s office. No he does not have court ordered visitation of any kind. And I did tell my brother not to answer the phone if he calls, and not to let him in our home. He told my brother yesterday to pack his stuff up and be ready to go live with him on Fri. My brother isn't going anywhere. So since yesterday after fussing and cussing at me he hasn't called us or showed up at our house. So I'm guessing he's waiting to see if my brother is ready on Fri. He won't be.