Ask Me Help Desk - Stuck with Non-bio child

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Her real father is back in the picture, this child is confused and acting out. Adults can sure make a mess.
There is a man she has called dad for the last six years, a divorce and real dad comes back in the picture like a knight, of course this child is going to act up. Plus she is a 13 year old.
This young lady needs somebody to tell these adults to stop screwing with her life.

U are right

Quote:

Originally Posted by this8384

How did you find out about my life? lol

And no, I'm not sure it ends. The "ex" in my life enjoys telling the kids things like I'm crazy, their father doesn't know how to treat children, they can call her new boyfriend "Daddy", they can't bring their snowpants to our house because they might lose them, etc.

Going through the same

Quote:

Originally Posted by tglover08

Scott u hit it on the head!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOWWW.. but i will put this in my way.. i have a child dont know the dad so i name the child after my best friend!!!! (fishy but lets finish) then when i marry i get my child from my mother and try to make my family look perfect so i tell my new husband.. (who will do anything to make me happy) this story that my child father signed papers to give up parental rights and I wants her to feel like she belongs and has the sdame name as us.. so the birth cert is signed... now i dont want him anymore because he is sick and i have a new man... but i still need my ex's money so im gonna place him on child support quickly.. because the guy who thinks he is her real father has come back into her life and i need someone paying child support..... crazy situation.. but that how it went.. and yes she gave the lil girl her best friends last name.. hell my mom gave me herz. not her best friend

The "father" looks worse and worse as you describe the scenario and the child is the true victim here, a victim of a coniving mother (if you are to be believed) and an irresponsible step father.

I am beginning to question any judgments the "father" made or makes.

I see - as I said from the very beginning - irresponsible adults blaming everything from Lupus to love for complicating the life of this child, no question the child has some sort of self worth issues out of all of this - and you keep making excuses for the "father".

Once again - you see this as all the fault of the mother and see no responsibility on the part of the "father." You post one thing, contradict it in another post, explain you are upset. I can only imagine what this situation is like for the child, live and in person.

I would assume your fiancé is on SSD. Doesn't the child receive financial benefits out of that?

I also trust a Doctor diagnosed Lupus, not an Attorney. I was not aware you HAD an Attorney - what is he/she doing about all of this?

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

The "father" looks worse and worse as you describe the scenario and the child is the true victim here, a victim of a coniving mother (if you are to be believed) and an irresponsible step father.

I am beginning to question any judgments the "father" made or makes.

I see - as I said from the very beginning - irresponsible adults blaming everything from Lupus to love for complicating the life of this child, no question the child has some sort of self worth issues out of all of this - and you keep making excuses for the "father".

Once again - you see this as all the fault of the mother and see no responsibility on the part of the "father." You post one thing, contradict it in another post, explain you are upset. I can only imagine what this situation is like for the child, live and in person.

I would assume your fiance is on SSD. Doesn't the child receive financial benefits out of that?

I also trust a Doctor diagnosed Lupus, not an Attorney. I was not aware you HAD an Attorney - what is he/she doing about all of this?

I never said that "dad" was perfect... in all honesty he wants her to stay around... but!! He wants her to be there because she loves him and understand that there is no chance for them in the future. The lawyer is telling us to place "nice" with the mother because of the stuff that she is trying to pull. Story goes deeper... and a lot of this is her mothers fault with me speaking to her she says it proud that she wasn't taking care of no sick a** man.. and no he is not on social security they say that he is too young and healthy looking..

?? So I ask you how do you care for a child or person that doesn't want to be cared for.. funny how people that have been through this understands this and even my frustarion and Thanks to all that allowed me to vent and correct myself. YOU can't PLEASE EVERYBODY!! And I will not try to.. even if I wasn't with him I would still see his side NICE guy Got fooked for loving the wrong woman.. and now this what's happens... the victims are him and the daughter.. he is the one has to watch her call another man daddy

[QUOTE=JudyKayTee;1487129]The "father" looks worse and worse as you describe the scenario and the child is the true victim here, a victim of a coniving mother (if you are to be believed) and an irresponsible step father.

I just saw what you got your info from... how is he looking worst when he did something that he thought wuld be good for his family... u know the vows sickness and health thick and thin... I marry you I marry your kids... Judy you act like you live this perfect life of no drama.. not one time did I say he didn't want her not one time did I say the didn't like her... take all of the responses and come up with what you want..

[QUOTE=tglover08;1487580]

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

The "father" looks worse and worse as you describe the scenario and the child is the true victim here, a victim of a coniving mother (if you are to be believed) and an irresponsible step father.

i just saw what u got ur info from.... how is he looking worst when he did something that he thought wuld be good for his family... u know the vows sickness and health thick and thin... I marry you i marry yuor kids... Judy u act like u live this perfect life of no drama.. not one time did i say he didnt want her not one time did i say the didnt like her.... take all of the responses and come up with what u want..

This is turning into a message board so I'll say what I have to say and then you can argue with yourself.

Don't tell me about my perfect life of "no drama". You know nothing about me. Nothing and that's obvious from what you've posted. Apparently when you run out of arguments you resort to insults.

I'm surprised you haven't been pulled from this thread for using text speak.

As far as your fiancé not qualifying for SSD because he looks "too healthy" - how a person looks isn't the basis for collecting benefits. Benefits are based on his general health and if you are to be believed he is in and out of the hospital with Lupus flare caused by stress. I'm not saying it's easy to collect. I AM saying that "how he looks" does not determine the extent or nature of his disability.

This thread needs to be closed. The OP received plenty of good advice already and is now attacking people who don't agree with her view of things.