I lied about my age to my boyfriend when I first met him and now its been 3 months and I still can't tell him. I don't want to lose him what should I do!!
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I lied about my age to my boyfriend when I first met him and now its been 3 months and I still can't tell him. I don't want to lose him what should I do!!
How old is he and how old are you? I am wondering why you lied? I'm guessing it is a significant age difference.
I'm 15 and he is 17 when I first met him I did not think we were going to go out but I wanted to impress him so I lied and said I'm 16 and now his family and everyone think I'm 16
When is your 16th birthday? You need to tell him soon. Tell him that you say your 16 because you like how it feels but you had not been thinking of what if... we start going out together, then when you got together you couldn't figure out a way of telling him since you were worried how he would take it. Be honest, the longer you put it off the worse its going to get.
15th of may, I'm scared I will lose him and what do I say to his family because they all think I'm 16 to
Maybe you should start by saying you are worried that you will end up broke up and then tell him why and you understand, but you really would hope that things will work out that maybe you can get back together at 16.
The thing about my boyfriend though is he get angry easly and would not understand why I lied :(
Nobody likes to be lied to but he will be even madder when the truth comes out and its not from you. Take your chances and tell the truth.
There are consequences, looks like you may learn consequences unless he is understanding and agrees to figure a solution to keep together. Its up to him.
I don't know how to tell him please help
I've tried giving you suggestions and as Talaniman said you better do it before someone else lets it slip. You don't want to wait until someone says something like 'Your 16th birthday is in May, I bet you can't wait'.
He told me that I got his heart so don't break it but if I tell him I don't know if it would or not
Tell him that you never ever intend to break his heart and he has your heart but you told one lie that you are worried will upset him more than you can bear.
I just asked him if he would ever break up with me and he said only if I cheat of lie so what should I do
Tell him you have to correct something you told him before you got together because it is eating away at you and you can't live with it bothering you any more.
*correct something you told him before you got together* assuming you have not been mentioning your age since the time you got together.
I don't want to lose him and I know I will if I tell him
And where do you think your lying will get you? Come on I doubt anyone tells you to keep up this lie.
So you don't tell him, then your birthday is coming up. Then he finds out by someone mentioning your birthday. Then he remembers yourconversation and thinks/gets angry why didn't you tell me back then. Then he is MORE angry that you left it go soooo long.Quote:
Originally Posted by lara pain
Then he definitely breaks up with you, by then you are even more hurt because you have that much more time and 'love' invested in him.
No one else knows and I want to tell him but I just can't
Its your decision but you will have to live with it now or later.
I'm not understanding your fear. You said he gets mad easy. Are you afraid of him?
Tell him "I told you was 16 when we met, I'm sorry but I'm 15. I hope you're not too upset" What is the worse he can do? If he is that much of a puritan you're going to have a rough time with him. You've only been dating 3 months.
No one knows how I feel
This is a big red flag. If you have only known him for three months and you are already afraid of his temper, then you need to walk away before something makes him angry enough to physically hurt you. Lying about your age could be that 'thing'.Quote:
Originally Posted by lara pain
If you aren't afraid of his temper, then you need to be honest with him about your age especially if sexual contact has been mentioned or initiated.
Has he met your family and friends?
Are your parents okay with you dating a 17 year old? Or have you lied to them about his age?
Frankly, as a mother, I think you need to let this male find someone else. You haven't known him very long and you already extremely intense about this relationship.
I think your feelings are way too intense for a 3 month relationship.
When does this guy turn 18?
You had just turned 15 when you started dating him. At your age, the law protects children, because they lack enough maturity and life experience to make adult decisions. It's as simple as that.
You are pretending to be older than you are, which puts your boyfriend at a distinct disadvantage. Most adults of children your age, would agree that the motives of a 17 year old boy are different, than say, a just turned 15 year old boy.
In other words, even when ages are close together, there is still a difference in development.
That you lied about your age to make yourself more appealing to this boy in order to establish a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, was sneaky and dishonest. You probably knew that there would be rejection if you told the truth. That he said 'honesty' would be a reason to not date you, or rather dishonesty, well- you've given him reason to end the relationship right there.
That he has traits unbecoming to any person- i.e. anger- puts you again in a position where you are in over your head, because you have NO experience in judging a relationship where anger exists. His anger, is significant.
Whether you tell him your age, hope he forgives you, and decides to carry on the relationship anyway, you are still too young. You do however, have it within your own power to end an unbalanced, likely unsafe (the anger in him) relationship, before it goes any further.
Try to think what is in your best interests here. You can carry on, and say nothing. You can tell him the truth and face his reaction/rejection/anger, or you can decide for yourself that you realize you are simply too young to be wading into dangerous waters. I'm talking sexual, particularly. Are you even thinking about that? He will expect more, and it sounds like you would do anything to keep him. That might be one of the things he would expect- sooner rather than later. 'Proof' that you are mature enough for a relationship, or 'proof' that you love him.
Get out while you can, and just end it. You don't owe him any explanation, other than you are not ready to be in a relationship. Period. And THAT, is the truth.
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