All right so there's this guy.. I have known him for 5 years and he was always like a brother to me but every time we are with each other we ALWAYS flirt. I end up getting feelings for him and so I told him and at first he said nothing would happen between us cause he didn't like me like that plus our age difference. He's 21 and I'm 16 but you would never expect that. A couple weeks after I told him we talked every single day and just getting closer.

One night a bunch of friends got together so I invited him and he actually came. The whole night we were cuddling , holding hands and he kept kissing me on the head. I'm thinking it was a little weird for him but then he seemed to enjoy himself. About a week later though he told me he wanted to be just friends cause he tried seeing how things would go when we were cuddling and he said he didn't feel anything so we didn't talk for about 2 weeks until I seen him again at the mall. We started talking again and started hanging out a lot. We went bowling with friends and he did the same thing where he was hugging me , cuddling me and every time I didn't hug him he would get upset. My family knows him very well and says he's a player and just wants to use me for sex but I really don't think that's true cause he hasn't even tried kissing me. I find every time we cuddle and **** he gets scared and backs away and says we can only be friends but every one that knows the situation thinks he likes but is afraid to date me cause of my age which I can understand.

I asked him what he thought of me and he said I'm pretty, outgoing very smart and he loves being around me. He knows I love and care for him a lot and he said to me this is hard for him cause he cares about me to so it's making the situation more difficult for him. We stopped talking for a week and then started talking again and we seen each other again at the mall and every time he sees me he always hugs me and like I said we flirt. I'm so confused cause I feel like he likes me but at some point I keep thinking he doesn't :( this whole thing has really messed me up cause I can honestly say I never felt this way for anyone else before and when we don't talk for more then 2 days I get headaches, I feel sick and I shake cause I feel like I'm going to lose him. Why do guys have to be so confusing and give off mix signals ? HELP !

You are too young for him and he knows it. You ought to leave him alone and he you. I'm assuming you are still in HS, I'm sure hanging out with you and your friends seem odd and very out of place for him.
He is an older guy and of course you may be feeling something very strong for him, but this situation is not a wise on. He is trying to use restraint and common sense, let him and leave him alone. I'm surprised your parents have not told him to leave you alone.

I think you should date him when you are 18!
You are underage now and its not right. Why don't you occupy your mind to something
More productive and interesting and which will help you in future.

For now just forget about him. I think the cuddling and kissing part is the cause of
These feelings, so Don't DO THAT! AVOID IT!

I think what your parents and family members said was right! He could be a player for all
Know. Listen to them, the are your elders and have more experience in life. They must have seen
Something in that guy which provoked them to title him as a player.

Be careful and wisely take your decisions!

I agree with the others! I really do! I'm 20 and my boyfriend is 21, and let me tell you, their mind really isn't suited to date a 16 year old!

X Dani

It`s his choice to hang around my friends, I don`t force him. And I have older friends that are usually from 16 to 21 anyway so he fits in very well so that`t not a problem. Yes he knows I'm 16 we have talked about it before and he says he wishes I was older cause he does like me. My mom never said leave him alone
Cause she has know him very well for 5 years and knows how I feel towards him.
As for dating when I am 18 would definitely be worth it and I'm willing to wait. Obviously I don`t want to waste like a year and a half on him but I would consider dating him when I'm 18. And he's not a player I have known him for 5 years and the only reason they said he is a player is cause he's 21 liking me a 16 year old. Its not his fault he fell for me jut like I can't help myself from liking him.
And even when I try leaving him alone and we stop talking for a couple days he is the one who always comes back. He starts talking to me and asks when we will hang out again. And every time we do he says how much fun he had and can't wait to hang out again.

Your situation is like mine ! :( ! And I know how you feel we can't understand boys this days !
Well I think that you must move on! He's a liar !
He just can't find the perfect girl ! And he just needs you for entertainment not more !

He is too old for you, he is an adult and you a minor. It is inappropriate

Yeah I don`t think ill ever understand him.. you know how us girls are though always hoping he will change :( But my plan is to move on , ill still be his friend but for awhile it will hurt me seeing him. & sadly :(

Sadly I already know that.

Then do the right thing and have him stay away from you before something happens and you both are in trouble, especially him.

I understand that , I don't want anything bad to happen but I have known him for 5 years I'm not going to just remove him from my life. And he says he wants to be in my life too

No you don't have to completely disconnect yourself to him. Just LEARN to keep it till friendship.
In life you are going to face plenty of situations like this, what? Are you going to disconnect
With all of them? That's not the solution!
Learn to control yourself. It will do no harm but make you a stronger person.
Take it as a learning experience. You can date him after you turn into a major. No harm in that.
For now keep it till friendship. Who knows that later in life you might find a better person
And a perfect match! Have patience! He is not the only hot looking guy in the world;) lol
Everything will just be fine, just give it sometime.
But remember, exclude the "hugs and kisses" which could be the cause of such feelings to persist!
Keep safe xoxo:)

Thanks for the advice ilove_eminem :) I'm going to keep it as friends for now until I'm 18 and see where things go from there. I will keep looking for other guys but I definitely don't want to remove him from my life cause that won't solve anything.

Yeah that's what you really need ! Me too ! Sometimes he say that he like me then he say he love me then he say he don't love me! When I see him he's not him !
He act like he really in love with me !
All the boys are liars !
I can't trust in them! Be careful :)

He is not a boy, he is a 21 year old adult who should not be seeing a minor.

Now that's like a sensible person;)
Best of luck

Okay it doesn`t matter if he's a boy or an adult man they are all liars.like no questions asked! And we aren`t seeing each other and sorry we can't control our feelings for one another.. But thank you rania1 I will definitely be careful :)

Thank you so much ilove_eminem :)

You can control your feelings. People do it every day. It is a
Matter of choosing to do the right thing thing then practicing discipline.
When you know something is not right, you don't go there to begin with.

I never thought it was a bad thing hence to why I continued to like him and sure but sometimes when it comes to situations like this its not that easy thank you .

It is inappropriate because of your ages
I'm sure he realizes that this is why I said it was not wise to pursue this to begin with

Sure the age is a problem but haven't you ever heard that saying that age,sex,race etc shouldn't interfere in love ? Sure I'm 16 and he's 21 and that can be wrong but at the same time its only 5 years and I have known him for awhile I know him very well. And I'm not the only one pursuing this.

5 years is a big deal when your talking about an adult and a minor. 5 years is a big deal if you're talking about a 10 year old and a 15 year old. 5 years is OK if you are both adults.
I don't care how long you've known him, you are still a minor and he an adult, which is why he seems to be so hesitant with you. He knows better or at least he should.

He may like you, but hopefully he knows you are too young for him to be messing with.

Whatever screw it.. I will just be unhappy !