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What state do you live in? What in the world would you have in common?
If where you live it is legal, I guess it's not "wrong". Maybe socially awkward but I don't think there's really a problem.
Get used to being asked, Is that your son when you are out in public, or the boy being asked if that was his mom he was with.
Or people talking behind women's back about her new "boy toy" but again 11 years is not that big a deal as both get older.
So is it wrong, as long as both are willing to endure what others may say
Define wrong. If you are asking if its illegal, the answer is no. There are no laws governing dating. Its not even illegal to have sex with him since he's over the age of consent.
But from the viewpoint of most of society, you are what is referred to as a cougar. There is also a question of what you could possibly have in common.
In my opinion from a moral and ethical standpoint it certainly isn't something I would agree to or condone.
Good luck at the prom.
No its not wrong, if that's what you want to do. You and his mom will have a lot in common, but expect a lot of gossip, and stares.
Thinking of how my son was at 18 I wouldn't have liked it very much. Not that I could have done anything about it of course, but inviting my children's partners round for Sunday lunch would certainly have felt odd in this case. Have you met his parents yet? I would guess that might be the biggest hurdle but maybe that's just me.
How would it come about that a relationship could develop with a kid that is 21 years younger than yourself.
Do you have other children, a husband? Are you a professional such as a teacher? Did you 'meet' online?
How did you meet, and how did the relationship part start.
If you are a teacher, it is indeed wrong, and inappropriate, and you would hopefully lose your job, as other teachers have before you. If it is a friends son, or if you have a son that age, and it is his friend, that too is inappropriate and you risk your relationship with your son, and possibly your husband, if you have one, or your boyfriend (if you have one of those your own age).
If you were a 39 year old man, asking if it was okay to date an 18 year old girl, what would you think the reaction would be. What would you think if somebody asked you that question?
If you are asking if it is legal, I have no idea, but I think that it would be a waste of taxpayer dollars to make it unlawful in the books, because most people would not be asking the question seriously in the first place.
Care to fill in a few blanks here?
Sorry, I can't see him doing anything but wanting sex from you. If that's all you want (which I doubt) then I am sure he is only too willing to accommodate you.
And capable too
Or possibly he could be a stud muffin and she wants his bod!! :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by talaniman
Could be a money thing as well. Most times when you see a younger celeb get with a older celeb people are always thinking it's because the older one has a lot of money and may kick off soon.
Could also be a mid-life crisis for the 39 year old. 40 is nagging them closely by and are scared so they feel if they snag a younger guy then they won't be that close to what they feel is old.
Regardless of the reasons, it's not necessarily wrong for you two to date. It's to each their own. But it's not something that everyone is going to accept. You may loose friends, he may loose friends. (Of course he may gain brownie points from his friends). If you can date while being comfortable about the negative, views, looks, and things people will say then you might be able to pull it off.
But there are other things to consider. The both of you are at different levels in your lives. You have a lot of experience, have accomplished a lot and should be nearly settled in your life. While he is just freshly starting, possibly not even knowing what he wants to do with his life. A relationship like this is either going to hold him back from starting his life or cause a lot of problems in which the relationship eventually ends because you realize you two are at different areas in your lives.
If it's just a short fling of sorts then if you're comfortable with it, have fun. But if you're aiming for the long term there's a lot to think about.
Well opinion that is wrong that would be like dating your son or a teacher dating a student it may not be illegal but its still wrong
There is one positive to this, In twenty or so years they can live on her pension:rolleyes: Just saying:cool:
,
Hello e:Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie321
It's not wrong to WANT to do it. Hell, I want to date 47 year olds. But, I don't. You shouldn't either.
excon
Absolutely! It also matters where the mentality of both parties are at, especially the 18 year old.Quote:
Jake2008 agrees : But doesn't it border on abuse of power, influence, and control?
My opinion is that it's wrong whether this woman is a teacher, has a family of her own, or anything. The age gap is too significant. Maybe it would be more appropriate if the younger party wasn't freshly an adult and just starting their life. But in this case they are. I think a relationship like this could drastically hurt and hinder him in life.
Oh gooodnesss... is all I have to say about that!
I believe in live and let live we can't help who our heart falls for or who we share chemistry with. If you and him are OK with this and the many judgemental people you will run into so be it you only live once.life is to short for regrets and what ifs.
There isn't one its OK for an old man to date a young girl but not the other way around. It's the old double standard again.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jake2008
An 18 year old male or female?
I don't see a problem with a 20 year age difference, but when it's a child and an adult, then it's a problem.
If he was 28 and you 48, that would make a bit more sense. At 18 he hasn't experienced life, but a 38 year old surely has.
I would walk away from this, wait until he's older, and if you still feel strongly about each other then, go for it. Let him experience a bit of the world.
He'll find someone his own age and you will be really heartbroken.
I wish you would find someone your age.
Sorry, but it is very rare that such a relationship is built on anything more than lust. The main issue is that its exploitative.Quote:
Originally Posted by jbarnes2191
I don't know about the others but I would react similarly if the sexes were reversed.Quote:
Originally Posted by jbarnes2191
What I said was,
"If you were a 39 year old man, asking if it was okay to date an 18 year old girl, what would you think the reaction would be. What would you think if somebody asked you that question?"
And the point being that there was no double standard here; it matters not what the sex is, but a 39 year old man OR woman, dating an 18 year old GIRL or BOY, is inappropriate in my opinion.
And you never did answer how this all came about. Are you a teacher? How did you manage to get involved with 'dating' an 18 year old in the first place.
Is this relationship actually happening, on the ouside? Do his parents know? (I presume he still lives at home with his parents).
You aren't asking if you should date an 18 year old, so I presume that you already are. And if you are OK with it, and you go to movies, out for dinner, and all the otherwise normal everyday things couples do, then why are you asking the question in the first place.
We met through friends and we chat online. I am from england, so its legal here. I am a single mum and have 2 teenagers 13 and 15. My 18 boyfriend has just turned 19 and he says age is no barrier and its not for me either. We get on well and he makes me feel wanted, something I haven't felt in a long time. The sex is good, the best I have ever had in age.
But I will take it one day at a time. Call me what you want, don't really care.
Not met his parents yet, its not gone that far in the relationship where we want to meet parents.
He is his own free spirit and he and I have chose to get close, which we both love.
Many regards to you all xx
You have four teenagers. What you do is your business. I think it's sick.
As long as you are happy and you realize that people, meaning family and friends along with co-workers might talk behind your back. You have made it really clear that you don't care what people call you.Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie321
I have to ask though, why did you ask us if it is wrong?
To me, you DO care, or else why go on a website and ask.
You have two teens not much younger than your boyfriend. Are you concerned about what they are thinking?Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie321
Is part of your reason for asking if it is 'wrong' to date him due to mixed feelings about what if it were one of your children wanting to date someone your age?
I wish you the best of luck and happiness.
This is great, your kids and your boyfriend can hang out together, seeing as they're very close in age. Ya, that was sarcasm.
You have a child that's not even 4 years younger than this child you're having sex with.
I have to ask, how would you feel if your 15 year old dated a woman over 20 years older than him? You okay with it?
Its not illegal if that what your asking but its gross
Lmao! I was got "picked up on" on Friday. I work at a bank and I was helping out this young man with his account problems. When ever he comes in I thought he was flirting with me but just wasn't sure (yes I am that out of touch!) So he comes in and says he has to update his address and info too.. he writes it all down and after I enter it he tells me to keep it.. I laugh nervously and told him I was going to be 40 next year and that he was only a year older than my son (my son will be 21 at the end of the year).. he did the up and down check out of me and said that I was in his words "hella sexy and attractive" mind you, I can't stand slang ! Lol so that goes to show you our age gap.. I thanked him and had to walk him to the door (it was the end of the day at the bank and the doors were closed).. when I opened the door he touched my hand and said "call me".. weird I felt this intense electricity go through me when did that.
So today I sign on to Facebook and I have a message.. no I did not give him my info he said he did a search for me (I have a unique name).. I politely let him down, thanked him for the major ego boost and declined. He said age was just a number.. I told him if I was 10 years younger I would go for it but I'm not..
If you want to debate opinions, start your own thread, or take it to the member discussion forum, and its wise not to put too much personal info on an Internet site.
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