Okay so I started working a couple months ago, and there's this guy that has already been working there. I believe he's 17 and he started talking to me and we kind of flirt all the time. But it is soooo hard to tell if he likes me or not. Like I would definitely date him he's nice, and funny, but I don't even know if he has a girlfriend already or if he's just that type of flirting guy. I never usually see him flirting with other girls, just me. And like when we first met we both talked and we both have a lot in common, we love soccer, and we both play. And he was like asking me where I go to school in stuff. But I don't know what his vibe is. Helpppp pleasee!

Just be friends for now and keep talking about things you are both interested in and see where it goes. Don't put any hopes or expectations on it or he could pick up those vibes and get scared off.
Hope this isn't a job you really want to keep long term if it doesn't work cause it is hard going to a job where your ex boyfriend works.

Okay, so I continued to be friends.. and I found out more info. He does have a girlfriend and has for about 3 months now. Buuut every since we started talking we hang out allll the time. He brought me home from work one night, and I hung out with him and his brother on new years, and him and his brother took me snowboarding. And recently, he wanted me to go to his soccer game and I did. Now here's the help wanted part. He has a twin brother. And his twin brother tells me all the time he thinks I'm cute and stuff, and obv I think so too, because there twins, but idkk what to do. His bro is single, but I like the other guy moree. He's just nicer and sweeter to me. What do I doooo!

Date single men. Ignore the rest.

If the brother is single, go for it. You can date someone without making a life commitment, right? You can date to have fun and see how you do in the compatibility department? Can't you?

Don't make this into more than it is, people having fun. Have fun. Only date/flirt with single people.

Alrightyyyy so I like this guy that I work with. He has a twin brother who I work with too. Awhile ago his twin bro asked me to go snowboarding with him and his bro. I didn't end up going but I continued to hang out with him. Now the one I like had a girlfriend. But he is the more sweeter one, and nice and fun to be around. And his bro is a player. Anyway, I continued to hang with them, they came over my house for new years, and then I went to there's. And every since they asked me to go snowboarding, the one I like brings me home from work every night. We laugh and flirt all the time. So then I got closer to him. I went to his soccer games, and his parents were even starting to talk to mee a lot. He texted me every day. Then I found out he broke up with his girlfriend. I asked him why, but he said it just happened. Then we started getting even more closer. He would text me and tell me I was beautiful and stuff. He took me home one night and asked me to go to the movies with him. So the next night we went to the movies, he picked me up two hours earlier and we hung out and flirted the wholeee time. And he even brought his friends to the movies and they met me and everything. He even took me out to eat after! But, then the next day at work, he started completelyyyy ignoring me. He wouldn't even look at me, nothing. So I texted him that night and said " are you mad at me for something?" and he texted back and said "i'm not mad at you and i'm not ignoring you. i've just been busy with school and stuff. but i wanted to make it public that i don't want to get involved with a signifigant other. not right now at least."... first of all, I have no idea what he's telling me. Why take me to the movies and everything, if you don't want to get involved with someone? So I thought maybe he was being dumb or whatever, because it's not like I did anything wrong. But he continued to ignore me at work for several days. Stopped texting me. Didn't even bother to look at me or anything. So finally I got fed up and texted him after work one night and said " okay i'd like to know what i did or said to make you act this way. I have been nothing but nice to you. and i know you don't want to get involved with someone but you don't have to be immature and ignore me. i don't understand" and he texted back and said " i'm sorry you havn't done anything wrong. If i was ready to have a relationship i would have no hesitation in dating you" so I said " okay that's understandable but even though your not ready i can't see why we can't be friends" and he's like yeah me either. And now he continues to still ignore me! I mean, what did I do? I don't understand! This has been going on for about a week and a half. Any ideas on what is going on?? : [

This guy sounds to me to be a bit of a chicken. I could be wrong but its sounds like he has feelings for you. Feelings he is scared to handle. Guys hate to be vunerable and I think that's what's going on here. If he didn't like you he wouldn't of hung out with you. And if he looked at it as purely friendship then he wouldn't of cut you off. Maybe he is just scared of falling for you and thinks the only way he can stop this is to cut you off. He coud of easily stringed you along but he Knew there would be feelings attached.

My advise is cool off, don't keep contacting him. You will only make it easier for him to ignore you. Men are like books staring into mirrors completely backwards.
Give him some space, he won't be long about relaising what he is missing. And if he doesn't then you should be dam glad and thanking him. I doubt you would want to start up a relationship with someone who isn't ready... only leads to hurt :-)

Feelings are very difficult to explain and are often fleeting.

His actions speak louder than words and while it sounds like he may have wondered about you, you are obviously not a priority in his life right now.

Maybe he was feeling you out at the movies and for whatever reason he wasn't feeling the chemistry between you. Be happy that he was honest and told you he wasn't interested right now instead of leading you on too much.

You probably didn't do anything wrong, things just change. Haven't you ever been interested in someone and then for no apparent reason the feelings subsided or went away?

If you really like him than by all means, keep in touch, but don't dwell on him.

Hey, okay well the fact he has gotten back in contact you could mean several things. I wouldn't get my hopes up just yet! Don't forget the hurt he has caused you!

I would play it cool but not an ignorant kind of cool. Be as polite as possible but make it seem as if your not fased by this whole situation. What has he been saying to you?

Well he just was texting me like nothing happened. And then when I went back to work, he completely ignored me again. I was like omg are you serious. And then later that night he texted me asking if I was mad at him. And I said noo your not talking to me. And he said he was sorry, that his phone hasn't been working, and he's like I know I'm making excuses but I'm sorry. And I go it's okay but you could still talk to me in person. And he's like I know but I thought it would be awkward and I was afraid I would get ed at or something. And I told him that I wouldn't do that and we've been talking ever since. But so now recently he's been bringing me home again and tonight he asked me to go to the movies again. I don't know what message he's giving me now?

maybe you should lower your shoulders, relax and go with the flow...

I mean, I said in the text that he didn't want to be serious right now, and he might have meant that, so you need to take that at face value. If you like hanging out with him, as a friend or as a friend you flirt with then hey! heng out, be friends and flirt but don't expect anything else, well don't have any expectations what so ever

if it turns out that he likes you as more then a friend, he will say so... if not, in that case, he is just a friend.

don't over analyze everything and just have fun , enjoy and go with the flow!

If it turns out that he is just playing games, then work from that, but right now you are just two people hanging out and doing nice stuff.

Maybe you should grow some self respect and stop answering his small whiny messages with this excuse and that excuse!

You were right at the start, you've been nothing but nice so leave him to deal with his 'issues' on his own.

Yeah I'm getting sick of it. Because we just went to the movies the other night, and he had the nerve to start kissing me. So we kissed and we held hands all night. And I could tell that we both liked each other at this point. But next day at work, not a word, nothing. I really don't understand him anymore. It's like when it's convienent for him to talk to me, he will, but when I want to, he doesn't. And he rarely texts me anymore, and I told him he's the one who's not talking to me. And he makes excuses. I really don't know what to do now. I just let my wall down for him, just so he could do what he did all over again..

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by britaay011

i really don't understand him anymore. it's like when it's convienent for him to talk to me, he will, but when i want to, he doesn't.

---

Ding Ding Ding!!

We have a winner!

This is why he acts the way he does... BECAUSE HE CAN.

Stop putting yourself through this.

First off it's never good to get involved with someone you work with because if things don't work out it can make things awkward, just like it's now.

Your allowing yourself to be put in this confusion by hanging out with him and doing things that couples do so stop that and move on. Stop focusing on why he isn't doing things and focus more on by it's bothering you because the reality of the situation is that he isn't your boyfriend so therefore he owes you nothing.

If he wants to ignore you than let him by doing the same. Stop texting him and worrying about "why" he is doing this and that to you because if anything it shows that your needy and have feelings for him and you was already warn before hand on what he doesn't want. Stop going to the movies, kissing him, etc He's only doing what you allow him to do.

Yeah it's been about three weeks now, and he still hasn't said a word, no text, no talking at work, nothing. Ugggh :[ whatever.

You can do so much better than him by the sounds of this, just forget him and move on, its seems he really isn't worth it hun

Yeah, you should move on! He is a wast of your time. And three weeks is quite a while not to hear anything, so draw a line, step over it and move on.

Soo, here we go. There is two twins that I work with. I've hung out with them quite a few times, but in particular I spent a lot of time with one specific one, Nicholas. Me and him went to the movies twice, I went to his house on new years and we hung out, I went to his soccer games, he brought me home from work almost every night. And he texts me all the time. Well, we started getting closer and he had just recently broken up with his girlfriend. And of course that gave me more of a reason to get even closer to him. But things started getting weird and he started ignoring me. I finally said something to him about it. And he said that he wasn't ignoring me he has just been really busy and if he was ready for a relationship he would have no hesitation dating me. Ok, understandable. So we started getting closer after that again. We went to the movies, and we ended up kissing and everything. But also at this time he started getting back into a "bad" habit. In using drugs. So after that night, from then on, he ignored me. And then he did it a week later. And continued to. And still did for about a month. He would not talk to me. And I found out he was having contact again with his ex. So then, I'm getting all upset about it and just thinking to myself that I don't even want to bother with this guy anymore. Well then his brother started getting closer to me. And I thought well at least he still talks to me, even though his brother doesn't. And we got close. But I did not, whatsoever have feelings for him. I still had a lot of feelings for nicholas. Well one night, they were bringing me home from work, and we all were just sitting goofing around. And his brother came in the back with me and starts to flirt with me. Now his bro has been trying to do stuff with me, but there is no way that's happening I wouldn't do that because I still had feelings for nick, and it's his twin brother for crying out loud! But his bro comes in the back and puts his arm around me. Then he kisses my forehead. And then all of a sudden he starts making out with me. And it gets further from there. But I didn't even know that was going to happen. And I had no idea what I was thinking. And after they brought me home, I just realized what I had done. And I texted nick and told him I was sorry I didn't mean for it to happen. And he said he didn't care. So I was like all right you don't care at all? And he's like nope. So from then on, he hasn't said anythingggggg to me. And it sucks because I still have so much feelings for him :[ and I feel like even if I didn't do anything w/ his bro, he would still be ignoring me. So I don't know what to do about this situation. I know, I know I deserve if he doesn't tlk to me. But I had the idea that he didn't want anything to do with me anymore. Like I keep thinking is it because of this habit he's getting to again? Because this is not the nick I knew! And I just need advice on what to do now :[. Or how can I make this situaton better? Pleaseeeee help

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by britaay011

and then all of a sudden he starts making out with me. and it gets further from there. but i didn't even know that was going to happen.

he said he didn't care. so i was like alright you don't care at all? and he's like nope.

---

You were there, so you have to take responsibility that you made out with each other.

Yes it sounds like he was pulling away from you anyway but you also mentioned that he's been in contact with his ex. If he'd just broken up with her before you two started spending a lot of time together, it's very likely that he wasn't ready to be in another relationship so soon. Guys have feelings too so it's possible that he's still hung up on his ex (or they may be back together).

Hooking up with his brother definitely isn't the way to go if you were trying to build something with Nick. You may as well hang it up because it's doubtful that you will ever have a chance with him now after fooling around with his twin brother.

He said he didn't care- that's your sign to move on.

I have to agree there and didn't u say he used drugs I would stay away if I was u

So what should I do, just ignore him and not have anything to do with him at all?

Well if I was you I waould find somebody that you actually have something incomin with you and don't I and I repeat Don't get pulled into drugs because well not just go there find someone you have a lot in coming with