Quote:

---

Originally Posted by chrissymarie

What I've noticed is that alot of super sexy woman dont have significant others thats why their being so sexy... to attract a significant other. Most woman tend to dress a lil more conservative once they get into a relatonship.

But again thats only what I've noticed.

---

Sexiness isn't only about the clothes. Like Synnen said, it's confidence that makes most
Women sexy. You can be the most gorgeous women in the world, but if you lack confidence, it doesn't matter how sexy you dress or look, most men won't give you a second glance.

I'm 38 years old, and back when I was younger I was considered quit attractive. A lot of times I wasn't approached by guys, a male friend finally told me that most guys thought I was out of their league. After being told that I started to get off my butt and approach guys.

Now that I'm older, not unnattractive but definitely older, I still attract guys, why, because I have confidence. I can go to a bar and most times be approached before any of the younger more physically attractive girls because I am confident and comfortable in my own skin.

Confidence is something most people have to work on, but once you have it the skies the limit. Work on your confidence, it's sexier than any low cut blouse and short skirt out there. ;)

Awww... Alty... I believe you are what we young fellas call a "cougar" ;)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by kctiger

Awww....Alty....I believe you are what we young fellas call a "cougar" ;)

---

Funny. Actually I'm very happily married, have been for over 13 years. Hubby and I have been together since we were both 19, I would never step outside my marriage, just not something I would do.

It does feel nice when a guy flirts with you, but I always let them know that I'm married and not looking for anything else.

Cougar, hee, hee. Wait, does that mean I'm old? :(

It is another term for a hot "older" woman. No... it isn't a negative connotation at all.

I will quit before I start digging my own grave here...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Altenweg

Work on your confidence, it's sexier than any low cut blouse and short skirt out there. ;)

---

So a big fat gross looking woman who doesn't care about herself walks up to the bar with a lot of confidence and ask a guy out and then a really shy gorgeous super model walks past him but never stops by the bar... chances are the super model is going to get hit on before the fat girl gets a chance to spit her game.

Work on your confidence after you work on you appearance. First you have to visually attract someone to you before they'll take the time to care about your confidence.

Sorry Altenweg to pin point only your quote out. But come on... you and I both know the chances of meeting a guy at the bar or anywhere who cares about personality first before appearance is highly unlikely.

Every guy I ever dated was more attracted to my personality than my "fat" by model standards (I wear a size 14, and it's not a flat stomach 14 either).

Yes, confidence can go a long way---but fat does NOT equal "gross".

If her hygiene is great, and she has a good personality and a brain, well then unless the guy is stupid himself, shallow, or under 20---then YES he is going to choose the heavier fun girl over the shy silly twit who can't even open her mouth to laugh.

PS--Confidence is all OVER. It has nothing to do with one's looks, size, or way they walk. It has to do with believing that one is as good as anyone else, and loving oneself COMPLETELY.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Synnen

If her hygiene is great, and she has a good personality and a brain, well then unless the guy is stupid himself, shallow, or under 20---then YES he is going to choose the heavier fun girl over the shy silly twit who can't even open her mouth to laugh.

COMPLETELY.

---

Why do I get the feeling that guys under 20 aren't worried about laughing as the major consequence of their "twit's" mouth opening...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Synnen

Every guy I ever dated was more attracted to my personality than my "fat" by model standards (I wear a size 14, and it's not a flat stomach 14 either).

Yes, confidence can go a long way---but fat does NOT equal "gross".

If her hygiene is great, and she has a good personality and a brain, well then unless the guy is stupid himself, shallow, or under 20---then YES he is going to choose the heavier fun girl over the shy silly twit who can't even open her mouth to laugh.

PS--Confidence is all OVER. It has nothing to do with one's looks, size, or way they walk. It has to do with believing that one is as good as anyone else, and loving oneself COMPLETELY.

---

I believe your getting off topic.

Nope, Chrissy.

Just correcting your misconception of "confidence" because you don't QUITE understand how sexy that is---to EITHER sex. If you didn't understand it, though, it was worth explaining further because the OP might not understand either.

I know that I tend to oversimplify ideas that are easy to me, forgetting that concepts like that don't always come as easily to others.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Synnen

Every guy I ever dated was more attracted to my personality than my "fat" by model standards (I wear a size 14, and it's not a flat stomach 14 either).

Yes, confidence can go a long way---but fat does NOT equal "gross".

If her hygiene is great, and she has a good personality and a brain, well then unless the guy is stupid himself, shallow, or under 20---then YES he is going to choose the heavier fun girl over the shy silly twit who can't even open her mouth to laugh.

PS--Confidence is all OVER. It has nothing to do with one's looks, size, or way they walk. It has to do with believing that one is as good as anyone else, and loving oneself COMPLETELY.

---

Had to spread the rep but BRAVO!! :D

The super model ideal isn't reality, there are few women out there that actually fit that mold.

Will guys turn their heads for a gorgeous women, yes, will they take her home, probably, will they start a relationship with her, not unless she's got something under the hood. I'm not saying all gorgeous women are stupid, I'm sure they're not, but most of the girls I know that are breathtaking, well, once you start talking to them you realize that's all they've got going for them.

Most men, once they get older, will look for a life partner, someone they can talk to, discuss things with, have fun with. Confidence isn't about your outward appearance, it comes from within. I know women that are very overweight, but when they walk into a room heads will turn, they're confident, comfortable with themselves, and that's a very attractive quality.

The gorgeous dumb chicks only turn heads for so long, but the confident women, she can turn heads forever!

Good example, Kathleen Turner. She's no spring chicken, and she's never been gorgeous, but men drool over her. Why? Because she's confident.

Sorry Chrissymarie, but I really have to disagree with you.

My mother always told me... Beauty is what Beauty DOES!!

I have to agree that sexy is not all about clothes, or to have a natural "breath taking" beauty, its more about confidence!

One of my friends is what you would classify as overweight, but she has a nature that is so open and she is confident to the bone and when she walks into a room, she shines, and she is a real head turner.

I've known some girls over the years who have been classified as those 'hotties' or 'beauties', but they are nothing compared my friend, because she has something a lot of those girls doesn't have. She has substance.

The guy I'm seeing now, I think he's hot because he has that something, he's so sure of who he is and he's comfortable in his own skin and there really isn't anything that can beat that.

LOL What KC said was so right on the spot: Looks get you in the door, and brains keep you in the house! I think that really just sums it up.

As for normal girls vs super models, like alty said; most women doesn't fit that mold... lol, what a boring world this would be. ;)

Hi guys need your advice again, I been writing on the dating site to the guy and he made it clear to me that he wants sex.. we met two time since but we did'n have sex. He really crossed me with his desperation to have sex with me... Today we cuddled and he as usually wanted to undress me and I I just told him that I will have sex with him but only if I get pregnant after and have a baby... I just wanted to make him not to want sex so much... He asked my why do I need that? But he wasn't angry or anything... ( I didn't mean to start family with him just to scare him away from sex.. ). I said later OK, I was just joking, just want to see your reaction. He said and what was my reaction? Was I happy? I said you just asked why do I need it... When he left, I suggested him to come back for sex as I changed my mind, just wanted to see the effect of my words.. He said, " you know, I don't want now, lets be just friends as you suggested, write to each other,meet for a coup of tea sometime as you say that I am too desperate for sex, maybe I have to slow down...".
I just interested, what does he really thought of it? Is he going to be pen pal with me or these words that he told me just mean nice " Good buy, I don't want to know you anymore"

Thanks to you all!

If she don't tickle your fancy, no amount of beauty, or confidence is going to keep you coming back for more.

Men get bored easy, and our attention span ain't that long. We tend to just hit it, and quit, as the world is full of beautiful, sexy, females. The ones we keep have a lot more going for them than just looks and a smile, and good attitudes.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Altenweg

Sorry Chrissymarie, but I really have to disagree with you.

---

I believe the OP is asking how to attract a man... not keep one. But then again the OP's question isn't very clear. A woman's looks are the first thing that attracts a man to a woman. After that personality holds it... so what exactly are you disagreeing with?

Chrissy, this is what I disagree with;

Quote:

---

So a big fat gross looking woman who doesn't care about herself walks up to the bar with a lot of confidence and ask a guy out and then a really shy gorgeous super model walks past him but never stops by the bar... chances are the super model is going to get hit on before the fat girl gets a chance to spit her game.

Work on your confidence after you work on you appearance. First you have to visually attract someone to you before they'll take the time to care about your confidence.

---

You assume that all overweight people don't take care of themselves? You also think that men are that superficial that they won't even look at a women unless she looks like a model? Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's what it sounds like you're saying.

I guess it depends on the guy, most of the guys I know would rather have a women with substance, not an empty pretty shell.

Yes, being phsyically attracted to someone does get you to approach them, but that's the part you aren't understanding. Confidence is a very attractive quality, even if the outer shell isn't gorgeous.

I'm not gorgeous, I'm above average by most people's standards, but a model? No. When I walk into a room I own it. Why? Because I'm confident.

Not to toot my own horn, but I know, yes, know, that I could walk into a bar with a girl half my age, the body of a model and the face to match and I will most likely get approached first. More often then not that's exactly what happens when I go out with friends. I can't begin to explain it to you, it's something you have to discover yourself.

So yes, confidence, intelligence, substance, that's what gets the man, not a size 2 body with perfect hair and makeup, a low cut blouse and high cut skirt.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Altenweg

Chrissy, this is what I disagree with;
You assume that all overweight people don't take care of themselves? You also think that men are that superficial that they won't even look at a women unless she looks like a model? Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's what it sounds like you're saying.

---

No that is not what I'm saying. I'm using a big fat ugly woman who doesn't take care of her self but for some insane reason has a lot of confidence as an example to show that physical beauty attracts men better then merely confidence itself. THERE HAS TO BE A PHYSICAL ATTRACTION. Altenweg I will just let this argument go because obvously you live in some fantasy world where hot girls are hit on less the middle aged overweight women with confidence.

[QUOTE=Altenweg;1522647]Yes, being phsyically attracted to someone does get you to approach them
So you do agree with me..?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Altenweg

Not to toot my own horn, but I know, yes, know, that I could walk into a bar with a girl half my age, the body of a model and the face to match and I will most likely get approached first. More often then not that's exactly what happens when I go out with friends. So yes, confidence, intelligence, substance, that's what gets the man, not a size 2 body with perfect hair and makeup, a low cut blouse and high cut skirt.

---

I highly doubt this. You may get hit on because you are some what attractive and have an "awesome" amount of confidence... but if you were and ogre I'm sure no one would hit on you no matter what amount of confidence you have.

All I'm saying being physically attractive is a sure way to attract a man followed by confidence and personalityto keep him. I am not saying that being confident is not an attractive quality.

Chrissy, honey--you must be young still.

REAL men don't only look at looks. Looks are a dime a dozen, frankly.

I'm ALSO a "middle-aged" (in my 30s) woman, and I betcha I could out-do most 20 year old women with "looks"----to REAL men.

Boys, of course, are attracted to looks over anything else.

And---what the OP was asking is if good looking girls get more dates than other girls.

My answer to that depends on whether she's dating boys or men.

Synnen, had to spread the rep, but I do agree, LOL even though I'm in my mid 20s... ;

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by roxypox

synnen, had to spread the rep, but i do agree, LOL even though i'm in my mid 20s... ;

---

Roxy, age is just a number, maturity is what counts. :)