Ask Me Help Desk - Married man and me

Good for you. I am so glad you are on a good healthy path for yourself. Good Luck and God bless.

Glad to hear things have worked out for you. Best wishes!

Quote:

Originally Posted by marisa_franklin

Hi, brief detail about how it started. I broke up from an abusive relationship of eight years and the person that assisted me in moving, is the man that I'm currently involved with. We kept in touch innocently, talked as friends, then we just hit it off together falling deeply in love with each other. He caring for me and me feeling cared for. He helped me get over my past relationship which I have tried to for years. He never fell for anyone but his wife and he cares about her alot. I dont want for them to break up because he is a very genuine person that is very kind and caring. We discussed we can't be together and I'll find someone of my own someday and when it happens we'll still be friends. We can't control our emotions for each other, we have passionate sex and fulfilling talks. I love him for his companionship, his knowledge, his caring and sexually. Yet I don't want him to leave her for me, but sometimes I wish he was never married. I feel a bit confused about our situation. I already know that being involved with a married man is wrong so please don't remind me about laws and stuff like that and I don't want to hear that he is just with me for sex cause it is not like that. Give some good advice please.:confused: :confused:

I know love can happen at the weirdest time, are you sure this is love, or rebound? If this man is married and he tells you that you are not going to be with him, that sucks, if you are still living together I would move out, you need to realize you don't need a man to make you feel good about you, I have been in abusive relationship myself and it took me the same lesson to learn. There is a man out there who will love and commit to you and only you, you are to good to be another women. Get counseling and remember this before you continue and affair with this married man. What if you were his wife? (and he was doing this to you.)

Quote:

Originally Posted by marisa_franklin

Hi, brief detail about how it started. I broke up from an abusive relationship of eight years and the person that assisted me in moving, is the man that I'm currently involved with. We kept in touch innocently, talked as friends, then we just hit it off together falling deeply in love with each other. He caring for me and me feeling cared for. He helped me get over my past relationship which I have tried to for years. He never fell for anyone but his wife and he cares about her alot. I dont want for them to break up because he is a very genuine person that is very kind and caring. We discussed we can't be together and I'll find someone of my own someday and when it happens we'll still be friends. We can't control our emotions for each other, we have passionate sex and fulfilling talks. I love him for his companionship, his knowledge, his caring and sexually. Yet I don't want him to leave her for me, but sometimes I wish he was never married. I feel a bit confused about our situation. I already know that being involved with a married man is wrong so please don't remind me about laws and stuff like that and I don't want to hear that he is just with me for sex cause it is not like that. Give some good advice please.:confused: :confused:

What K_3 said was perfect and in the right words.
Let me tell you, this is my first answer to a post, since I don't like to read much into people's problem but scanning through yours , It got me.

I'm not the best to advice, but you might find helpful I'm in a deeper situation like yours, but the abusive part.
I understood everysingle one of the bad of being with a married man, but when you get involved it's hard to break it. When I finnally took the courage to put an end to this I found out I was pregnant! Yes... never happened before and then,it happened even thoug I took my precaucios. I was sad, but I'm taking the responsibility and he's too with this child that I love already.

Now, what does have to do with you? This can happen to you too! I could have avoided all this if I would have acted 15 days ahead.

Still, I'm in your position, and this K-3 user said the right words!
You're on time to free yourself of a confusive situation. He was there to help you when you needed it, now, you're fine and need to get your own life together and love yourself before you get involved with someone else.
I would like you to do what I didn't on time.

Best wishes

Did anyone read where she broke it off with the married man and has moved on to better things?

Yumita, Take the time to read before you respond, and if you have a life, good, that's not the point. And you can give me all the disagreements you want, just make sure you are making sense when you post. I know you're pregnant and not in a great mood but at least find out how to use this site so we can all benefit. Think how you would feel if the posters didn't read your whole post before they gave you an answer. Be fair.

I think if he love's you and you love him, then maybe you two should be together. He obiously doesn't love his wife alllll that much if he is having sex and loves someone else--also if he want's to leave... stop contact for awhile. He needs to explain things to his wife. Truthfully. Their relationship isn't as good as yours and sorry but everyone that is sad. So, I'd stay off for awhile and have him talk to his wife, and come out straight, honesty is best!

Why don't you all just answer the damn question. LOL... its not about you!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by marisa_franklin

Hi everyone,

this is marisa, long time no hear, ehh, but I have some good news. First of all I would like to thank all of you who have made comments and given advice. it was all very appreciated. I have found God in my life, I have dumped the married man three months ago, lost all strings from him. I have found a God sent helper who I am going to marry in the next 6mths. He is studying to be a pastor, his dad and mom are pastors and they have accepted me as there own daughter. I am given love, counselling, prayer and hope for a brighter and better future. I am so happy that I have forgotten you all but today. He is three years older than me, kind, gentle, single, ambitious and has a calling on his life to fulfill the purpose of God and I have to counsel and spread Gods word. I have never given up on God and he has brought me up and away from all evil and unrighteousness. And I leave you with a word of hope that God is most merciful and a forgiving God and he will take away your fears, burdens and tribulations, once you accept him as your lord and saviour, no man can put asunder, and your life will be fruitful in his word do I pray and praise. God bless and thank you very much. Faith is the substance of things not seen nor heard and victory is mine today because I choose God and he answered my prayer.

Just so the facts can come to light! Post #40

Im tired of all these dam women saying they with married men. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH You?? I can't believe that after you knew he was married you stayed. That says very little about your personality. Obviously you have NO self esteem if you know that he is and you STILL are with him. The anger when you found out should have been enough energy to leave him. You are just stupid 4 staying with him. Why would he leave his wife if he got her cooking and taking care of his home and getting free sex from you when ever he want to on the side? Please girl. You are just going to get yo heart broken. I hope when you marry the same thing happens to you. But I hope you find out. Maybe then it would give you and idea of how his wife would feel if she had proof. I HOPE SHE WHOOPS YO AZZ!

I can honestly tell you, its no fun being number 2 in a man's life. If he cheats on her, what makes you think he won't cheat on you. When an individual goes through a tough time in their life, they look for comfort. They don't realize that they may be looker for comfort in the wrong places. I don't fault you. I fault him because he saw that you were weak and he took advantage of you. You are better than that to have be put on the back burner for anybody. Trust in God to help you through and be your companion. He can't be your companion being a married man.

MsTaylor, this post is from October and this lady has moved on since then. This is one reason why it is good to check the date of the post prior to answering.