I just don't know anymore. I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't.

I guess I have been playing her games. I treat her just like she treats me. Whatever she does to me, I in turn do it to her.

My life has been better since I came to this site.

But playing games should not be part of a mature and healthy relationship.

I don't know if I understand why you think you are "damned if you do/ don't" Do you think that if you end things with her that you will never find anyone else?
The way I look at it - the longer you stay in an unhealthy, doomed from the start, hurtful relationship - the longer you are putting off finding the person you are MEANT to be with.
You are learning a life leason right now. You are learning what you don't want or need in a partner. There is value in that. But, I think you know it is time to move forward.
Good Luck.

She's an immature brat, and a user. Do yourself, and her, a favor and find someone at your own maturity level. Wait until you have your own kids to take on the job of raising one.

I think that she is taking you for granted. It probably is inappropriate to talk to the ex-husband but that is something I would do just because I'd have to know. You shouldn't have to check up on someone you love or have to worry. If you just basically bought a house for you two and she's acting like this that isn't a good sign. And this is only the beginning of perhaps a life together? I don't know thoughh

If she is never happy --then why are you with her. It is as simple as that. Adventually she will drag you down into that as well and there is not easy path out. If the things you do togther never make you happy then noting will. The more freedom one has they also have to take the responsibility as well- it is a balancing act.

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Originally Posted by NowWhat

I don't know if I understand why you think you are "damned if you do/ don't" Do you think that if you end things with her that you will never find anyone else?

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I say "damned if I do/ don't" because that's they way it is in the relationship. If I do anything for her, she finds something wrong with it. If I do nothing for her, she gets angry. I'm not stressing anymore. I'm taking care of myself and she can do what she wants. No more waiting on her to become mature.

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Originally Posted by menoshoes

If she is never happy --then why are you with her. It is as simple as that. adventually she will drag you down into that as well and there is not easy path out. If the things you do togther never make you happy then noting will. The more freedom one has they also have to take the responsibilty as well- it is a balancing act.

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I'm not really with her. She basically follows me. She will never drag me down to her level of unhappiness. I have too many good things in my life so I don't need to worry about some bitter person.

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Originally Posted by helpnow

But playing games should not be part of a mature and healthy relationship.

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I agree and I've already stopped playing 95% of them.

Honestly, I think you need to move on. And let her know that. You need to find a woman who has the same goals as you. Who is done with the party lifestyle and is mature enough to handle a relationship.

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Originally Posted by NewYork123

I think that she is taking you for granted. It probably is inappropriate to talk to the ex-husband but that is something i would do just because I'd have to know. You shouldnt have to check up on someone you love or have to worry. If you just basically bought a house for you two and she's acting like this that isnt a good sign. and this is only the beginning of perhaps a life together? i dont know thoughh

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I never worried or checked up on her. She would always get mad because I didn't. The house may have been for us but we both decided to try it for a month. If I'm unhappy she's gone!