Originally Posted by
dontknownuthin
Wow - uhm, I'm not sure what kind of response would help you. I am Catholic and what I would do if I got myself into such a situation would be first, to accept whatever fallout I got from it from whomever I told about it as deserved. I would go to confession too because in my life, I've found that helpful - of course, that may not be an option for you. I would not go to make myself feel better, but to make myself more accountable and to get some good advice on improving my character and being a better person moving forward.
I would not be getting upset with people who found my reprehensible behavior reprehensible.
I understand the advice that you should tell your friend what you have done but I'm not entirely sure it is the right thing to do. It could result in her child growing up without a father, the end of a relationship that might have potential that outweighs this betrayal. I'm not sure it's your right to betray her and also out her boyfriend's infidelity to her, taking her whole life down in one fell swoop. I think you should both shut up about it and he should work on the relationship. You should let the friendship go. Leave this family alone. If the boyfriend chooses to tell her what you and he have done, so be it.
As for the grammar corrections - well, sorry you are taking offense but seriously, "aye" instead of "I"? Are you a pirate? The pronoun for yourself is "I". "No" is used as a negative response like, "no thank you". If you are speaking of knowledge, the word is "know". Myself is one word. It does matter because you're hard to understand, so take responsibility for fixing the errors, thank people for taking the time to help you. Why would you be proud of not caring that you're bad at communicating in writing?
An attitude of not caring is what got you into this mess. I tell you that because when you accept that knowledge of yourself, you can start working on not making a mess of things moving forward.
You have to understand, there's no way to respond to what you've addressed here without acknowledging that you and this man doubly betrayed your friend and potentially did tremendous, life-long damage to her child. We can't really soft-shoe around it - that's what you've done. It doesn't mean you can't ever be a good person, but this was a very base thing to do and there's unfortunately not a good way out of it.
I think the best you can do is get out of their lives because, given they have a child together, the relationship between the boyfriend and your friend is more important than your friendship with this woman. He may be able to mend the relationship and keep his family together, but it will never be possible with you around. She needs her child's father more than she needs you, so go your separate way.
