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Val again you have come up with the most profound statements:
I can assure you we will see this one again.Quote:
Do you know the difference between real gold and fool's gold?
Skell, sometimes it is very hard to hide my disdain for selfish people who don't give a damn about any one but themselves and have the utmost nerve to be sensitive about it.
Im hearing you there Tal.Quote:
Originally Posted by talaniman
Fluffy Clouds,
My advice: you are young, 21 and the world is bigger than this.
There are hundreds, thousands, millions of men. It's a shame you feel love for this man, but you can feel love for other men. It's totally within your capacity.
If your best friend was in the same situation, what would you tell her?
You would want someone for her who would appreciate her, who could be with her wholeheartedly, who would be proud of her, and who would be proud to show her off.
I'm not going down the line of other people here, because it's been said,
BUT THEY ARE ALL RIGHT
Have these criteria in a mate:
Someone who is proud of you
Someone who is inspired by you
Someone who respects you
Someone who INTRODUCES you
A lot of women (and I definitely include myself in this!) often make the mistake of overlooking this simple list. If someone introduces you to their close friends, it shows a pride in your company. This is the highest indicator of a mans respect for you. This man can't introduce you to anyone. He may have feelings for you, but they are not free - and that's not by a "trap". He is in a chosen situation. He has married someone.
THREE LITTLE FACES CALL HIM "DADDY". Show some strength. You would not want this for yourself, for your children or for your friends. Be brave. Walk and let someone else enter your life.
But take time to heal. You obviously don't believe you are good enough for a proper relationsihp. So get some space for yourself, and do things that other 21 yr olds do- like getting drunk and kissing guys your own age, silly dancing at nightclubs, and going to parties.
If I ever find myself in a car with someone who has shut their eyes and is stepping on the gas and is asking what to do, I'm going to yell (not kindly suggest) "open your eyes and hit the brakes before something really awful happens"... and probably not that kindly either...
Sometimes the best advice is to simply tell someone to get their head out off their a$$. And not mince words doing it.
Look, this isn't "make me feel better about myself irregardless of the circumstances"... it's a help desk. You're doing a dumb thing and acting like you are helpless. get over yourself.
You need to grow up in so many ways. You want to hear it kindly? Fine. Ill try.
1) keep your panties on dear.
2) reach around to your back. Feel the bumps? Those are your vertebrae. Its your backbone. Learn to use it in the strength-of-will sense, not the lay-down-on-it-and-forget-rule-#1 manner.
3) have more respect for yourself and a little more dignity. Until you do, you're likely to keep wondering why you keep having these things "happen" to you. The "i just can't help myself" talk is just plain sad at best.
4) when you ask for help, especially when you KNOW you are being a fool, don't expect others to coddle you and get you warm milk and a pop tart. Tough love is sometimes what you need... and you really do need it.
Well crap... that wasn't kindly. Oops. Couldn't help myself.
End it now. Like right now. Or go on being a person you don't like very much. It REALLY IS that simple. Really.
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