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-   -   All about a girl. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=396587)

  • Sep 15, 2009, 09:45 AM
    Andrew1987

    Until you've been in the situation and it seems like things will change,you don't know. I understand that I shouldn't have done it. It was more her decision than mine. She broke up with him after. She chose to hang out with me and be with me. It was her choice. We'd been lovey dovey for 3 or 4 months before we even kissed. I know it was wrong. Its something I'll live with for my whole life. It's something she'll live with too. I was wrong but when you're there, you know what you want and I wanted to be with her. I love that girl with all I have. It's just the way I went because I thought it opened a door... and it did... for a while.
  • Sep 15, 2009, 12:01 PM
    paxe
    Well there is nothing too much to do, except learn and take it as a break up. You know there is plenty of girls out there and it's pretty easy to get one. And no she isn't special and you haven't found the right one yet that's all. You need to stop all contacts and heal already. Easier said then done, yeah but I've been there and it's feasible. She wants to be alone, let her be. Beside she cheated on her boyfriend, why wouldn't she cheat on you?
  • Sep 15, 2009, 12:54 PM
    Andrew1987

    She's tried to call me 5 times today. I just am not picking up.
  • Sep 15, 2009, 12:57 PM
    amicon

    That's the best thing .No contact.
  • Sep 15, 2009, 01:07 PM
    crisluvsu731

    How old are you guys?
  • Sep 15, 2009, 03:29 PM
    Andrew1987

    Early 20's
  • Sep 16, 2009, 01:08 AM
    spoilsport
    Andrew, if she has a boyfriend.. she should call him! You shouldn't be in the picture.. it doesn't feel right!

    How is college? Don't let all this come in the way of your college and studies. . focus on it.. time will heal everything.
  • Sep 17, 2009, 04:24 AM
    Andrew1987

    She's called about 10 times the past two days
  • Sep 17, 2009, 04:29 AM
    amicon

    Is that called as in you didn't pick up and speak to her?
  • Sep 17, 2009, 09:46 AM
    Andrew1987
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by amicon View Post
    Is that called as in you didnt pick up and speak to her?

    Correct
  • Sep 17, 2009, 10:03 AM
    talaniman

    Its so hard to break that kind of intense attachment, we all know how hard it is. Keep ignoring all her efforts to contact you, so you can get out of her charms, just so you see how wrong it was for her to cheat and throw you away like that. Intense feelings are not love, (not healthy love, anyway) cheating isn't love, and other peoples opinions are not relevant either.

    What is relevant, is you seeing the reality of this fling, and judge her actions as the real facts, not the feelings you have.

    You were seduced, and used for her own needs, and she cares for neither of you, just herself, and has led you down a wrong miserable path.

    That's the facts, so keep her out of your life so she can't hurt you again, and you can heal from what she has done to you.

    This isn't love, it manipulation, and being selfish, and dishonest.

    Don't be a part of it, at all. Don't ever let someone treat you this way again, never.
  • Sep 18, 2009, 01:22 PM
    rivermeetsanend

    Wow, what a game player this chick is. She obviously doesn't know her boundaries. I would be careful with this one. And if you are moving away, what's the point of even pursuing anything? Especially considering she has a boyfriend... I would leave it alone. She needs to break-up with her boyfriend first before any relationship can progress.
  • Mar 21, 2010, 08:25 PM
    Andrew1987

    Here's the update... she left me for him, I moved home, she tried to be best friends again... I still had major feelings and it was continually brought it up until she decided to push me away. Then it gradually deteriorated into her no longer talking to me at all and completely cutting me out of her life.

    I miss our friendship we had before we ever crossed the line and I'd give a lot to have that back but I don't see her anymore anywhere.

    I want to fix our friendship but I don't know how.
  • Mar 21, 2010, 11:28 PM
    amicon

    Leave things as they are,if your friendship gets back on track further down the line,so be it-for now live your own life and leave her to live hers.
  • Mar 22, 2010, 05:21 AM
    talaniman

    Get new friends, and don't seek romance with them.

    If you could fix the relationship, you sure as heel can't fix the friendship.

    Once you blur the line between friends, and romance, the friendship suffers, as there is too much history, and emotions left to deal with.
  • Mar 23, 2010, 07:35 AM
    Andrew1987

    I know you guys are right... I think I still need to confront her though
  • Mar 23, 2010, 08:43 AM
    talaniman

    Confront her for what? Dumping you? For not being able to be friends the way you want it? For having another life, and love without you? To vent your anger and disappointments? To tell her how much you're hurting without her?

    Tell me what you want to confront her with?
  • Mar 23, 2010, 12:42 PM
    paxe

    It's been a while since I've been here, but NC is the only thing you should apply right now. We know you're hurt (that's why we were here initially) and we all agreed that NC is the only thing that works in this situation. Let her be and take care of yourself because you really need it. Start working out, start going out, work harder, achieve new goals. The fun thing about life is that you can make it whatever you want it to be.

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