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-   -   Hmmmmm, very confusing (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=110359)

  • Jul 24, 2007, 12:56 PM
    shatteredsoul
    WELL he is so intriguing! Maybe it is his mystique that gets me. There are cuter men out there, he just, gets me! You are right about not always wanting to be noticed for your looks, but you recognize that you are attractive. Yes, hot not the hottest is best. OTHerwise your head gets toooo big!!
    Haplo, I am going to go out on a limb and say I think this woman suffers from poor self esteem. She shrugs off your compliments because she truly doesn't believe them. You can tell someone they are beautiful, but if they don't believe it about themselves, it is difficult to believe it from someone else. Try just being kind and attentive. Make eye contact and listen to her when she speaks. Ask her how she is doing and then listen. Sometimes you just have to make yourself available and interested. You don't have to say anything, initially. Then when you want to compliment on her, make it something specific Not general where it sounds fake. Focus on something that she has particularly done that has made you think more of her. I have to know more about her and you to tell you what or how to say it. Just be yourself and don't be overly interested, just enough so that she notices but doesn't think you are a stalker or anything. You know what I mean.

    Nicespringgirl, even when you were chubby you were still HOTTTTTT!!
  • Jul 24, 2007, 12:57 PM
    Haplo
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Haplo
    I was speaking in context of the thread of this conversation. The thread is about how to compliment a woman sincerely on her looks....

    Whoops, sorry, I was wrong. I thought the poster meant about looks, but now I see it was in general. Even so, I know that sometimes I feel like I say too much, whether it's about her looks, her intelligence, her talents, her skills or anything for that matter. In essence, we guys always want to tell you gals how well we think of you but sometimes when we do we just get this weird look like we're crazy, and then we feel stupid for saying anything at all. It's sort of a nasty catch-22.
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:00 PM
    GoldieMae
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Haplo
    I too suffer from this person's question. There is a woman I like very much and I always want to tell her how attractive I think she is, especially since she's always complaining about her face or her body and such. I kept complimenting her though and she always seemed to shrug it off, so I stopped. I worry that I said too much so now she thinks I'm weird or something. I don't know how to compliment her well, and I'm afraid she thinks I'm being dishonest. How are we guys to cope? ;) Fill us in, women! (please? ;))

    If a woman is always putting down her looks, next time she says she's ugly or fat, say to her:

    "Sometimes I wonder how you get out of bed looking like that." When she gets upset or looks surprised, say: "You know I think you are beautiful. I tell you all the time, but for some reason you don't believe me. So I thought I'd try agreeing with you, even if it is the biggest lie I ever told in my life."

    It'll teach her a lesson that fishing for compliments and then shrugging them off isn't the nicest thing she can do to you, but that you still think she's beautiful.
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:03 PM
    Haplo
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by shatteredsoul
    Ask her how she is doing and then listen.

    She gives me weird looks when I ask her this question (or how was her day) and she just says "Fine." I'm probably the first "nice guy" that she's dated, and we're in that friendship stage right now, so I just go with the flow... ;)
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:10 PM
    nicespringgirl
    Okay Haplo,
    Why do you want to praise a girl? I assume you want to get a hottie;)
    Let me tell you what to do: Listen-
    1.Go up to a chick! Just do it man, quit being a loser, just roll up to a girl,
    2,look her in her eyes, and be like, "Damn girl you're so fine"... either A. she'll laugh and run to her friends and make fun of you or b. she'll be like thanks! If scene A occurs, well she's a loser and you wouldn't want to date her anyway. If scene B occurs, well then we have something here don't we!
    3Try, if it isn't too loud, to spark a little conversation, nothing that makes it too obvious you're trying to flirt... say something like "have you been here before, i've never been but it's pretty dope..." you know just something simple but something that requires an answer. I prefer, "yo what are you drinking?" or "yo I'm serious you look so good in those jeans, what's your name?!"... holla at me
    4.attenetion to details about a woman... what kind of shoes she wears, perfume, hair color, eye clor... all these things will help you in the long run. The more you can remember now, the easier it will be in the long run. Luckily for me I have an insanely strng memory and anything a girl ever tells me is stored. This way, a few weeks later you can use these as weapons to destroy her!!
    5.Forreal your brothers, guys have such an upper hand it's not even funny. Women try and act like they're the ones who don't care about guys but actually it's the other way around.
    6, the last step is the hard part... it's up to you where it can go from here... read her vibes. Is she vibing you? IS she smiling, looking you in the eyes? All of these are her signals for you to move in for the kill... now you can eithe start making out with her right there or you can tease her and just get her numbr and call her tomorrow...

    IT DOESN"T WORK FOR ALL, I CAN TELL YOU IT PROBLLY DOESN"T WORK FOR ME OR SHATTEREDSOUL:D


    But you can try it, happy now?:D
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:24 PM
    Haplo
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by nicespringgirl
    but you can try it, happy now?:D

    Nope :) I'm looking for honest, realistic advice. But thanks :)
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:29 PM
    nicespringgirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Haplo
    Nope :) I'm looking for honest, realistic advice. But thanks :)

    it is an honest answer... I wrote it for you, thought u'd aprreciate it:(
    The key, I think... for me... is not what the guy says, that is what the guy truly thinks, I value his mind more than anything else.
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:38 PM
    Haplo
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by nicespringgirl
    it is an honest answer...I wrote it for you, thought u'd aprreciate it:(
    The key, I think...for me...is not what the guy says, that is what the guy truely thinks, I value his mind more than anything else.

    I'm sorry, I didn't mean to downplay your answer, it just seemed you being sarcastic. I already know the girl, we hang out quite a bit. She knows I'm interested in her. I believe she's interested in me, but we're not "there" yet. (This is what brought me here originally)

    Anyway, like I said previously, sometimes she shrugs off a compliment, sometimes she just gives me a weird look and sometimes she smiles. Doesn't matter what the compliment is, looks, brains, whatever. I've come to determine that it depends on her mood I guess. I just wonder sometimes if I've said too much, so now I don't say as much in terms of compliments. I hate the weird looks ;) I do think she likes them deep down where she only admits it to herself, but then that could be my wishful thinking.
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:43 PM
    nicespringgirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Haplo
    I'm sorry, I didn't mean to downplay your answer, it just seemed you being sarcastic. I already know the girl, we hang out quite a bit. She knows I'm interested in her. I believe she's interested in me, but we're not "there" yet. (This is what brought me here originally)

    Anyways, like I said previously, sometimes she shrugs off a compliment, sometimes she just gives me a weird look and sometimes she smiles. Doesn't matter what the compliment is, looks, brains, whatever. I've come to determine that it depends on her mood I guess. I just wonder sometimes if I've said too much, so now I don't say as much in terms of compliments. I hate the weird looks ;) I do think she likes them deep down where she only admits it to herself, but then that could be my wishful thinking.

    Do u really think she is beautiful? Is she really beautiful in other's eyes? She problly has low self esteem. Say something not to formal. U get that? "yo, look good today!";)
    NOT" XXX, I think you look very nice."
  • Jul 24, 2007, 01:55 PM
    Haplo
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by nicespringgirl
    do u really think she is beautiful? Is she really beautiful in other's eyes? She problly has low self esteem. Say something not to formal. U get that? "yo, look good today!";)
    NOT" XXX, I think you look very nice."

    I think she's stunningly gorgeous. She's also extremely intelligent with a sense of humor and a wit that makes me smile just thinking about it. She's graceful and down to earth with a tremendous sense of flair that just intrigues me all the time. And her eyes are the most breathtaking pale green with cracks of gold in them that glow when the sun hits them and I can't stop staring.

    Would you like to know more? :P
  • Jul 24, 2007, 03:55 PM
    talaniman
    No games, be yourself and if you feel like giving her a compliment, then do so. If she gives you a funny look don't be afraid to check her, I mean she doesn't get to take your feelings for granted when its from your heart because she is having a bad hair day, tell her get over it, when she comes with attitude. She may be drop dead goergous, but she is no better than you so, don't take no crap.

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