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At many shelters you would become part of the herd and just a number, a "case." You want to find a social worker or shelter volunteer who will value your individuality and autonomy and will allow you to become part of the solution.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
I learned from my homeless friend how rich and interesting life on the street can be. I even wrote stories around his adventures.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
How accurately does Adam Shepard's experience reflect the American reality? - EagleTribune.com, North Andover, MA
You put me on the streets with 25 bucks... a sleeping bag, and a change of clothes. If I didn't have four kids, I may have been the one to volunteer to do it myself, I know good excuse huh?
Got Adams book and can't wait to read through and see what he went through and what he saw others go through. I will get back to you on that. I bet he saw what you are stating about the shelters, and I bet there were some people in his 10 months that made it through... because of self worth and determination. I wish there were a way to let everyone know they are worth it, that they are worth taking the time and energy it takes to succeed. I understand that not everyone feels that, it saddens me.
Interesting? I bet. I would love to read them.Quote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
Still, to become more independent, people need certain skills.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
"They have to be good at budgeting, solid in their sobriety," she said. "They need to stay on their meds if they have a diagnosed emotional disability."
And how many homeless have those skills? If they did, they very possibly wouldn't be homeless. The sobriety issue is huge. Even the mentally-ill (NOT homeless) surrounded by family and friends don't stay on their meds.
Very very true. I wish I were more educated in how to deal and help with these situations. They do need skills. Now, the question is where can you learn these if you need to? Would it be one of those shelters that "don't let you be yourself" or a separate place all together?Quote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
Well, I interned at Catholic Charities that had a transitional program for homeless families. An area church would help finance an apartment and furniture, and the family would have to allow members of the church to help the family manage its personal finances. The families resisted the budgeting help and strangers' poking their noses into their checkbooks, but had to give in in order to put a roof over their kids' heads.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
So what could have been a better way to handle that?
Whoa Wondergirl, don't you see that those people only wanted help if it didn't make them uncomfortable. Am I the only one here that sees that? The government takes our money, should we not make sure they are doing the right thing with it? People get food stamps, should we let them buy beer and wine with it? I needed to borrow my dads chainsaw, he said... make sure the tank is full and the chain is sharpened when you bring it back. The charity is for those who are going to put it to good use... and not abuse it. Doesn't anyone see what I am seeing or am I just stupid?
I put you up in a house and get you back on your feet... the least you could do is follow some simple rules.
EDIT:::: a better way to handle it would be to follow the rules or you don't get help. It wouldn't have hurt them one bit till they got on their feet.
So you would have said that to them, point blank.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
How about those thatbeckme homeless due to job loss or illness or medical bills?
We don't need the president or the government to "inspire" us to do good things.
I know my church has been helping in the community, I know the salvation army and Catholic Charities have been helping in my town. We all should be doing more on our own. How much can the gov help? Look at Katrina.
In western ky, it was neighbors and families helping each other out during this past months ice storms - yes the state and the gov will help also - but it is individuals helping out.
In this crisis do we sit passively awaiting for Obama or the politicians to do something or do we people of this country help each other
I am more inspired by the folks in the links I posted
G&P
Heck yes... I would say, "I am willing to get you back on your feet as long as you prove to me that you can do it. In this time I will want to see that you know how to spend the money you are receiving and I would like to make sure you are not abusing the system. I will do this for someone else that will not take advantage of me. Can you do that or would you rather keep living on the streets? It is up to you"
What is so wrong with a few rules that WILL HELP YOU?
So what are "we" doing to help those with illness and job loss? Are we organized? Are we helping most of them?Quote:
Originally Posted by inthebox
That line won't work with most of them. It sounds punative and arrogant.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
It sounds arrogant to the people wanting the help because? That is not the only thing I would say... I am a very compassionate person Wondergirl, I would encourage them to take the offer and encourage them to understand that I believe in them, and I that I think they are worthy and able of doing it. I wouldn't say here take my money and run with it. And that is what I think many want me to do. THAT IS WRONG. It is time to hold ourselves responsible.
Um, sounds like a parent talking to a naughty or disorganized child. Is that the kind of relationship this is? Is that how you want to proceed? (They don't give a hoot about your compassion.)Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
I agree. AND again, I wish I were more qualified to help these individuals.Quote:
Originally Posted by inthebox
So who's going to help them, if not you and the other unqualified people?Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
But they give a hoot about my loot;) Funny how that worksQuote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
No, actually they don't. Most of them just want a fair shake and some respect.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
Notice how you are throwing out the baby with the bath water?
Not sure, I am stumped. I am pretty sure we have some crappy funding and crappy help for these people. What should I do?Quote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
Ah, now you're starting to ask the right questions!Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
NO, I do not notice.Quote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
Fair shake? Take and take... but don't hold me responsible is not a fair shake.
Homelessness in America: Statistics and Prevention Programs
This is the first one that I clicked on.
Do you all agree that there have to be stipulations or should we just do what we can and let everyone off the hook?
Years ago a friend of mine from Africa was in Australia (of all places) and went into a church to escape a horrendous raging storm. He was homeless at the time. He was told that he could not stay in the church and was put back outside in the raging storm. He didn't ask for food or clothing, but just to be treated as a human being and he was denied even that.
In a lot of cities the "good" people have forbidden the feeding of homeless people. They have even shut down the churches from taking in people to stay out of the freezing cold citing fire regulations.
Has any of you actually been homeless? Probably not.
The writer who had $25, sleeping bag, etc. had a hell of a lot more than a typical homeless person. Now had he ventured out with literally nothing in his pocket and maybe one raggedy blanket and no change of clothes I just might be interested in reading about how he survived his "ordeal". He knew he had a real life waiting for him at the end of his assignment. What do the other countless homeless people have to look forward to? Not much.
Here is an entire site devoted to homelessness
http://homelessness.change.org/
They don't have the answers either.
No self-respecting homeless person would want a sleeping bag. What would he do with the heavy, sodden mess it would become after the first rainstorm he was in?Quote:
Originally Posted by twinkiedooter
My homeless friend was given many sleeping bags over the twelve years he was on the street. He donated them all to shelters.
So I am reading through and it seems to me we have a big fight to battle out.
As we all know we need to help the people, that mean you and I and monetary help from the government because we all can't afford to use our own money to do it. There are many reasons people become homeless, and a few of these reasons are single moms, violence in the home, some mental illness can be avoided before it ends in homelessness. Maybe we should help that person we know get back on track before the worse happens? Yes? Still there are programs that are great but there are too few of them.
What did he want then?Quote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
Yes, how can we be proactive and avoid/deal with the homeless possibility before it becomes a problem?Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
Huh?Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
I do agree he had something to look forward to. AND I think that is where we get it wrong, knowing you can make your life better with 25 bucks and a change of clothes... isn't that something worth looking forward to?Quote:
Originally Posted by twinkiedooter
Yes, we know there are laws saying we can only have a number of people in a building. Now where would your stance be if he was in there with TOO many people and the building caught fire and some died because the building were too full with people to get everyone out on time? You would be pissed that they didn't comply with the law. We have to have stipulations and laws.
We just have to. Everyone would be in an uproar.
Instead of the sleeping bag, what did he want? Why did he even take it if he didn't want it?Quote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
If you're homeless and stay in the same community all the time so that you get to recognize people and they know you, you don't refuse any handout. Sometimes he was given packages of dried beans or Easter baskets with little stuffed animals inside or huge cans of vegetables from the restaurant supply store. He always smiled and said thank you.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
(So what's he going to do with dried beans or stuffed animals, and where will he store the leftover vegetables after he opens one of the huge cans? What's he going to do with a heavy wet sleeping bag? It never ceased to amaze me how thoughtless people can be in their thoughtfulness. At least he gave his "overflow largesse" to me to take to shelters and food pantries.)
What annoyed me was when people gave him boxes of Fannie Mae or even Godiva chocolates, and, when he removed the cellophane, saw that the chocolate was all whitened and wrinkled, meaning it had been sitting around for quite a while or had been dug out of the freezer during a cleaning. What really annoyed me was his getting already-opened boxes of chocolates and some of the pieces had bites out of them or were smooshed. That sometimes happened with regular food too, that he got someone's leftovers (half rotten fruit, stale bread and cookies, dirty unmended clothes) that couldn't be thrown out for some reason (or were just an insult to the homeless guy).Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
I hear you on that one... thoughtless thoughtful people. I know exactly what you are saying! Most of my old clothes and unwanted food goes to shelters, I hope it is worthy of someone using it. I can't go out and buy NEW items for another family or individuals. My kids grow out of stuff and I give away at least every two months. Whatever I notice that I do not need or even want anymore. Half eaten chocolate is pretty lame, I have to agree. We need to find something that works.
SO, what DID he want? Anything or to be left alone?Quote:
Originally Posted by Wondergirl
You know, the more I think about the huge detention facilities that are around this country that are currently empty, the more and more I think that the government is just going to one day round up all the homeless people and put them in these camps. It reminds me of the 1930's and the labor camps that abounded in this country.
And the churches that were supposedly closed due to "fire regulations" were not open to ANYONE, let alone a few people. They were ordered NOT to allow anyone in to get warm. This was in NYC. More and more cities are turning "mean" to their homeless people in an effort to make them go elsewhere.
I am amused by Wonder's homeless friend. Very untypical is all that I can say about him. No, he didn't have any kids to contend with but just him. He just accepted his lot if he did this for years and years. I'm sorry, but I don't see what one single man homeless has anything to do with the families that are homeless. It's like apples and oranges.
The homeless situation is growing worse every day in California. What are they going to do with all these people?
Old clothes are fine -- but not dirty, unmended ones. Unwanted food is fine -- but not out-of-date food or fruit and vegetables that are full of spots or half-rotted or all shriveled up. My homeless guy was always very happy when someone asked him his size first and brought him old clothes that actually fit him. He was always happy when someone gave him two or three apples and not a five-pound bag that he would have had to lug around and watched rot before he could eat them all. Early one cold morning, a cashier at the local food store near where he hung out at night (well-lighted parking lot, police patroled), woke him up to give him hot soup from a fast food place. He told me it was like getting breakfast in bed!Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
As nice as it has been talking to you guys about all this, I must leave on this note for the weekend. My eyes and ears are opened as big as they can be, and I thank all of you for that! Twinkie, I checked out your link and yes, many are suffering. I can't wait till I have the time maybe even the money to help people out more than I do now. The little things will have to do for now. As you said, I am hoping they don't put all these people in the same place and jail them so they can never return to normal life, we need something bigger and way better than that!
Wondergirl, although we don't agree on so many things, I love your insight and always take what you have to say to heart and mind. I am obviously more conservative than you are. Have a good weekend.
Apparently this country is clueless about homelessness, whether it's a man in his 60s or a young family. That's what they have to do with each other -- cluelessness.Quote:
Originally Posted by twinkiedooter
He didn't "want" anything. He was given much. And he has given me much.Quote:
Originally Posted by startover22
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