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Originally Posted by Synnen

My sincerest apologies to the OP---

I mis-looked, and thought that Stephanie5 WAS the OP!!

I'm very very sorry for chastising the OP.

I stand by my words to Stephanie, though.

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Momo... you keep posting okay?

The emotional impact this will have on the other 4 children should be considered. Are the still young enough that you can explain away mom's big belly. What does the father have to say. Yes this is your body and your decision and you are the one who lives with it the rest of your life. No matter what you decide it's not going to be easy. Nothing worth while ever is. Quit asking others to make up your mind the answer is in your heart just listen. Good luck.

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Originally Posted by meyowgee

The emotional impact this will have on the other 4 children should be considered. Are the still young enough that you can explain away mom's big belly. What does the father have to say. Yes this is your body and your decision and you are the one who lives with it the rest of your life. No matter what you decide it's not going to be easy. Nothing worth while ever is. Quit asking others to make up your mind the answer is in your heart just listen. Good luck.

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This Op is asking for advice and we give her advice. Our advice is an opinion only. It is not up to you or anyone to tell her to "quit asking others to make up your mind". That isn't what she's doing . She is asking for someone to talk with. You need to read the rules before you tell someone not to ask for advice. To clue you in this is an ASK ME HELP DESK.

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Originally Posted by meyowgee

The emotional impact this will have on the other 4 children should be considered. Are the still young enough that you can explain away mom's big belly. What does the father have to say. Yes this is your body and your decision and you are the one who lives with it the rest of your life. No matter what you decide it's not going to be easy. Nothing worth while ever is. Quit asking others to make up your mind the answer is in your heart just listen. Good luck.

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Agree with Kitkat - if you don't want advice or don't want to give advice, post somewhere other than Ask Me HELP DESK. Perhaps the discussion threads are more to your liking.

Apparently the answer ISN'T in her heart or she wouldn't be asking.

I will charm in just a bit, while I may disagree with them, the advice to make up your own mind is also their opinion and while we may not agree, is also an answer, and not against the site rules that I can tell.

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

I will charm in just a bit, while I may disagree with them, the advice to make up your own mind is also their opinion and while we may not agree, is also an answer, and not against the site rules that I can tell.

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I hope the OP will continue to post... Fr_Chuck... thanks... :)
I think sometimes there are people who feel so alone.. the only ones they feel they can talk to are nameless, faceless people, who will listen. Whether you know it or not you have been an inspiration to me... I respect your opinion and many others on this forum. You have also made me laugh a lot(compliment).

Stephanie I respect your choice of how to manage your parenting responsibilities and would not criticize your choices. However, this poster has four kids, knows what's involved in parenting, and does not feel she can raise a fifth.

I think when a woman says "I'm overwhelmed and cannot do this" they need to be listened to, not talked out of their feelings. Clearly she needs reliable birth control, and she also needs to be encouraged to think from a very practical sense about what her limits are to care for all these kids, and what options are available to her.

Tough questions can arise no matter what she does but can be answered for her children in an age appropriate way, and as they become teens and ultimately adults, they can certainly grow in understanding the difficulty of her circumstances. She need not fear what they will think if one child is placed for adoption, nor if she makes a mature decision to abort this unplanned pregnancy if it's not too late to do so.

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Originally Posted by dontknownuthin

Stephanie I respect your choice of how to manage your parenting responsibilities and would not criticize your choices. However, this poster has four kids, knows what's involved in parenting, and does not feel she can raise a fifth.

I think when a woman says "I'm overwhelmed and cannot do this" they need to be listened to, not talked out of their feelings. Clearly she needs reliable birth control, and she also needs to be encouraged to think from a very practical sense about what her limits are to care for all these kids, and what options are available to her.

Tough questions can arise no matter what she does but can be answered for her children in an age appropriate way, and as they become teens and ultimately adults, they can certainly grow in understanding the difficulty of her circumstances. She need not fear what they will think if one child is placed for adoption, nor if she makes a mature decision to abort this unplanned pregnancy if it's not too late to do so.

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Wise words...

I'd also like to point out that most adoptions these days are OPEN---so she and her children COULD have a relationship with the child placed for adoption.

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Originally Posted by Synnen

I'd also like to point out that most adoptions these days are OPEN---so she and her children COULD have a relationship with the child placed for adoption.

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That's true Synnen... Happens everyday and I think it works well in cases I have seen.