I know this is coming late, but I just wanted to tell you, you are not alone. I experienced the very same thing. Honestly everything you wrote related to me. My boyfriend and my very best friend was 19 when he was in a car accident and we dated all through high school, almost 5 years. Coming up this spring will mean he has been gone for two years. I have friends who have gone through deaths of family members, but it is so hard to talk to them still. I never went to see a therapist because I don't like thinking of talking to someone who didn't know him, but I am starting to think of going to see one. As much as the pain is hard to bare, know you will be okay, not going to say you will stop thinking of him because you won't, you'll continue to think of him everyday. Even if he wasn't here for that long, he was put here to be apart of your life, and for that you can be thankful. He is somewhere better watching over you every single day. Know he wants you to be happy and live each day to the fullest. If you ever need anyone to talk to, I am here.

Please read this. It helped me so much... and I hope it might make you feel better too. In May 2010, I suddenly lost my boyfriend, best friend, and love of all loves too.
Love from Brigitte

https://www.evernote.com/shard/s26/sh/d6b6e95b-153a-49b9-b5df-f5eba1d41496/aa36980003086667dbf4ff9064feac2b

Quote:

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Originally Posted by junemoonchild

Please read this. It helped me so much...and I hope it might make you feel better too. In May 2010, I suddenly lost my boyfriend, best friend, and love of all loves too.
Love from Brigitte

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This is an international board - not everyone believes in your God, your Bible. If you want to discuss religion there are religious boards on AMHD which would welcome your comments.

In the meantime preaching on this board is inappropriate and could be insulting.

Sorry for your loss I feel your pain on October 26th 2011 I lost my boyfriend of 5 years and best friend of 7 yrs in the same car accident then 3 months later I lost another good friend and my cousin... in exactly 8 days to me posting this will be the 1 year anniversary of there passing its so very hard but I'm standing strong and I know you can. It always helps talking to someone who can relate... it also helped me to get a tattoo of stuff that was him,his nickname and some for my best friend... I wish you the best... stay strong... and keep your head up... p.s I totally get the "shouldnt you be over this by now" relatives it does hurt but turn to people who understand some people just have never gone through something like that and don't know how to relate but I spent a lot of time with my friends who've been where I'm at so it helps... you got this... there is hope because I to felt like there would never be I questioned why am I still here and he had to leave? Its just not fair but he's in a muuuuuch better place they're in paradise... take care

I just your story. Yes I have been there too. I was 20 and he was 22. Same thing car accident. We were together for 6 years. Losing him destroyed me for many many years. I made terrible decisions and just didn't care anymore. A part of me dies that day too. I really feel terrible for you. I remember exactly how you feel. 1 year after he dies, everyone moved on (expect his family) but there I was, still stuck, still hurting and soooo lonely and missing him. I think as time went on I missed him more and more, it didn't get easier for many years later. Now I am 36 and it was been 16 years later, I am still thinking about him and miss him, but life has moved on. I have a son now and another one on the way... The only thing that will help heal you, is time. But first it will get harder, then eventually it will get easier. I saw this amazing medium, she was dead on... I learned a lot... ( I don't rally believe in them but there was no way she was faking)..
Please take care, and remember you are not alone:)