View Full Version : I told him my feeling, and all I want is we can still be friend.
confusedGirl17
Apr 18, 2012, 07:42 AM
I met this guy over the online game, and he is one of my best friend over a year, and I strted to like him more than friend. But I know he is not feeling the same, cause he is just a really nice guy and he is nice to every girl that I know. So on the end of last year I told him about my feeling, just so I can get over him and I Said to him that I know that he didn't feel the same. He answered that I don't need to say that cause he already know from my action and the way I talked. I told him I need to say it even he already figured that out just to get over him. But after I confessed, we are getting closer, and he actually done a few international call (he lives in a diff country). So instead of getting over him I like him even more. At the beginning of this year I talked about the plan of going to his country and see him in person. He was as excited as I am. But in the end my visa got rejected and that was making me really dissapointed. And to make it worst, after I told him about the failed visa he said that I shouldn't put my hope too high if the plan of going to his country is just to see him, because he didn't want to see me dissapointed. I was shocked, and not quite understand on why he say that, so I blurted out saying if he is worying about my feeling for him that he can't reply , he no need to worry, because I treasured the friendship more. But after all that we became so awkward and distance ourself from each other. I really don't know what to do. I miss him a lot, not just because of my feeling for him, but also I miss him as my best friend. What should I do?"
EmberStudios
Apr 18, 2012, 07:52 AM
Tell him you miss him.
Sometimes, going for second best often works out well. For instance, I told my ex-boyfriend 'despite being hopelessly in love with him' I missed being friends with him, and now we are absolute best friends, even though we hated each other for well over a year. Now I realize I didn't miss being loved by him, I missed his company and his presence.
Contact him as soon as you can 'the longer you leave it, the harder it will be to do' and say you miss being friends with him and you are happy just being friends. Tell him that you are sorry it's been awkward, but you needed some time to think, and it is a shame throwing away your friendship.
If he doesn't reply, get back to me for stage two. If he does, go for it, girlfriend!
All the best x
Fr_Chuck
Apr 18, 2012, 07:58 AM
Why was your visa not approved, you were just asking for a tourist visa to visit the country ?
confusedGirl17
Apr 18, 2012, 09:02 AM
@Fr Chuck
My visa didn't approve cause my savings is not enough to prove that I won't be an illegal immigrant. I am not so proud on how famous is my country to be an illegal immagrant. Applied for tourist visa end up staying and working illegally at the country they visiting. :( And the fact that I only go to other country only once up until now.
@Ember
I don't know but I will try... to be honest I am scare to the other side effect lol.
mmresd
Apr 18, 2012, 10:29 AM
Just talk to him as a friend, but wait for the feelings to die down. You can't be friends with someone you like because you will get into the relationship mindset again. Give him some time off, and then when you are over it, you can start conversation again.