View Full Version : Returning to Church after long Absence
basquiat
Apr 23, 2010, 05:55 PM
How do you return to church life after a long absence due to Major Hurts form so called Christians?. i.e, How do you cope with being judged, as most Christians think because you've left church, you've left God. But so many christians live on the fringes with their love for God in tact, It's like Gandhi said:"I like your Christ, but not your Christians, they are so unchrist like".
Don't get me wrong, I Know that christians are not perfect (just like me) But It was people in LEADERSHIP that really got to me, I stuck it out for 10years simply because they would say "If I left it would be rebelling against God, & If I didn't follow their advice... I'd be rebelling against etc... So you can see how easily someone who's wanting to please God can get sucked into that. I have not been to church for about 8-9years & just started going to a different church... but it is difficult...
Wondergirl
Apr 23, 2010, 06:02 PM
If they are really Christians, they will welcome you into their midst, no questions asked. (You don't have to explain or apologize to them.) If it's the same church you left and the members judge you or make rude comments, move on to a different church.
classyT
Apr 23, 2010, 06:51 PM
Bas,
In my opinion, being hurt by a fellow brother or sister in Christ hurts the worst. It is a spiritual hurt but the Lord understands the exact pain you are going through... check it out:
Psalms 55:12-14
12If an enemy were insulting me,
I could endure it;
If a foe were raising himself against me,
I could hide from him.
13But it is you, a man like myself,
My companion, my close friend,
14with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship
As we walked with the throng at the house of God
The Lord understand your pain. AND if I read my Bible correctly( and I do) HE is the HEAD of the church. If HE can forgive being PERFECT, than who are they to stand in judgement. Find another church. A local church should be a hospital for sinners.. NOT a showcase for saints. :)
dwashbur
Apr 23, 2010, 07:04 PM
It's often been said that the Christian church is the only army that shoots its wounded. But there are good congregations out there; you just have to kiss a few frogs before you find a prince (or princess as the case may be). Shop around some, and don't give up. I'm kind of in a similar boat myself right now, having just relocated for the gazillionth time.
Fr_Chuck
Apr 23, 2010, 07:20 PM
You go for yourself, not for what anyone else thinks or says. If you allow someone else to get in your way between God and you, then that is your issue, not the other people.s
450donn
Apr 23, 2010, 07:25 PM
Too many church goers are too judgmental. Churches do not judge. Church goers do. So pick a church where you are welcomed with no questions asked. We have been members of one such church. It is a place who's mission is welcoming all who are hurting and offering help to anyone who asks. Start shopping until you find one. I know is some areas this may be difficult, but I would be willing to bet there is one within driving distance.
Kitkat22
Apr 23, 2010, 07:41 PM
I feel bad even addressing this post because I am one of those
Imperfect Christians. Being hurt by the people in Church is similar
To a broken relationship with a family member. It hurts your heart.
But Christ is the Church and he is the one we build on. A few
Years ago my husband and I were in a wonderful Church.. You
Could feel the spirit of the Lord when you walked in the door.
The Church had begun to grow and we hardly missed a service.
Then the members wanted to build a fellowship hall and that's the
Story.. some wanted it... some didn't. The Church was divided and it
Was so divided.. it wasn't ever the same again. It broke our hearts
But we found another Church and began to like it. Soon after the
Pastor said he didn't believe in women wearing pants to church.
Once again another split. We left and have visited other Churches
Sporadically.. but I have never gotten over the hurt Christians can
Cause each other. The Bible says.. "Fail not to assemble thy selves
together." and it also says, "Come together in one mind and one
accord". When you've been hurt that's hard to do. I still don't
The Lord doesn't cause discord in Church. Don't look to people the
In Church, people will disappoint you. Don't put your faith in
Man, cause man will disappoint you. God will never let you down.
I say things and act in ways that are not Christ like everyday.
That's because I'm not perfect.. but I am forgiven. Forgive those
Who hurt you... just as Jesus forgave the very one's who nailed
Him to the cross. God Bless You and Please Pray For Me as I will
Be praying for you. We are children of God.. even though we are
So imperfect I wonder sometimes how he could love someone like
Me.. but he does and he loves you. Ask God to lead you in finding
Another Church. He will... Blessings:)
arcura
Apr 26, 2010, 09:59 PM
basquiat,
You have been given advice to shop around and it is good advice.
Finding the right one for you may be difficult but as the bible says persevere.
Keep trying it will be worth the effort to you.
Peace and kindness,
Fred