My sister is bipolar, on medication, but is not stable. She has a one-year-old daughter, my niece. She is unemployed and lives with our 62-year-old single, working mother. My mother does everything: works to support them, takes and picks the child up from daycare, shops, cleans and takes care of the baby. My sister loves her daughter, but my mother is the primary caregiver. The child's father has legally signed away his rights.

Currently, my sister is in a 'dark period'. She is at her lowest low, drinking and driving with my niece in the car, passing out without putting my niece in her crib (or changing her diaper and putting her in her pajamas)... and the list goes on. My sister is not noticing the ways she is neglecting my niece and putting her in danger (in the last two days has burned her accidentally in the bath, took her for a ride in her red wagon and didn't notice my niece falling out - when she cries, she can't figure out why or what happened.) The combination of her meds and alclohol makes her disoriented and delusional (she thinks she's being a great mom).

My mother would like to file for guardianship or custody, but I worry that she's 62 years old, unmarried and her only partner in life is my abusive (to her), mentally ill sister. And that no matter what, this will end badly, even if my mother finds a way to kick my sister out of the house (something she doesn't do today because my sister can take the child and put her in even more danger since they'd be homeless). I should note that my sister is stubborn/mentally ill/paranoid and would never leave the child behind willingly because she is not sound.

My mother, sister and niece live in TX. I live in CA. Our options are for my husband and I to file for custody (we have two children already, a home, incomes that total around $150k a year, we're stable emotionally and financially) or for my mother to file for custody, then kick my sister out and try to raise her away from the danger my sister poses when she's down.

But I wonder how realistic all this is. When my sister goes to her psychiatrist, she is the image of perfection. Her psychiatrist believes she is always doing well. But at home, she can be a monster. So, are we in for years of back and forth legal battles? Constant monitoring by social workers? I think we can prove my niece is in danger now, but what about 4 months from now when my sister stabalizes, and another 4 months from then when she's driving with the child in the car while under the influence again?

I just wonder if there's any way to save this poor child. Would love any advice.
Thanks.

First we need some answers. Were the fathers rights taken away by the courts ? If its just a piece of paper then that's not enough. You could have the mother declared unfit and then move to adopt the child. That way you can always control access to the child as far as the mother is concerned. With the mother living at home with the Grandmother of the child its not likely the courts would change anything. The reason being is that the child would be in the same situation but even in more danger because of resent or other things that could crop up.
If the mother is a danger to the child then removal is the only way.