Ask Me Help Desk - Sex addict

Sex addict

Hello:

Please help me. I'm an elderly gentleman, but I still have an over abiding interest in sex. I thought it would go away by now. I seem to need it two or three times a night.

To those of you who can help, I'm home most evenings...

excon

Well, the first step is admitting you have a problem, congratulations.

Exie my dear, you should have posted this under the Comedy and Humor category. Posting it in the Adult Sexuality area is definitely going to get you into trouble..

I doubled checked the forum myself, Exy will no doubt be getting a spanking for this one, but I think he may like it.

Hello again, ladies:

I have Wednesday open... Maybe I can squeeze you in on Thursday.

Ex

Thursday works for me. Same place as last time?

I am sorry Exy, but I can not be an enabler.

Exie, whatever you do don't do like the guy on "1,000 Ways to Die" did. He popped 3 Viagra pills and went to his mistress' place and did her. His mistress knew he was coming over and put 3 Viagra into his drink. Then he got a call from his wife and popped 3 more Viagras. His wife happily put 3 Viagras into his drink as well. The guy died with a smile on his face as well as bulging eyes.

Quote:

Originally Posted by excon

Hello again, ladies:

I have Wednesday open.... Maybe I can squeeze you in on Thursday.

ex

Honey, you can squeeze me ANY day!

I'm thinking it over. What do you consider "elderly?"

I won't be "squeezed in".

You either make yourself available to me when I want you, Exy, or no dice.

Hey exy, I hear that Rosy Palmer has 10 sisters and they are usually free on a nightly basis.

Exy, you had me at hello. ;)

Are you serious? I don't know if this is a joke or you want a real answer...

Happy to give a serious answer if you want one! :-P

Oh he's serious Sandy (that's what I'm calling you now, everyone gets a nickname).

It doesn't require a serious response. Exy handles his addictions well. There are testimonies and affidavits attesting to his skills.

What we really need to be asking is his address. ;)

Exy dear, I think we need to know exactly where your interests lie. Give us a few examples of what you expect.

Haha Alty! Lets see what he says..!

Ps I never imagined excon as elderly! In fact it is quite strange to think how we imagine everyone on this site to look like! I suppose we all have our own internal imaginings of what eachof us look like... except for the kind people who provide pics. Interesting thought hmmmmm...

He's a cutie, but he isn't a spring chicken. You're only as old as you feel, and apparently Exy feels like a horny 18 year old. ;)

I know he had a link up once of him doing a rap. Personally I think he looks a bit like George Carlin. That's just my opinion though. :)

I think you need to settle down and get a grip on it.

The only help for you is to have your needs answered and it seems to me you have a lot of willing women out there,you old dawg :)
My BF is 54 and he is like a teenager so I don't think it goes away,you just have to grin and bare it :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by sandalwood7

I never imagined excon as elderly!

Hello sandy:

Well, I'm not elderly in that I creak when I walk. I don't shuffle. I can still run faster than my son (ok, that's not true - but don't tell him), and most importantly, I can still get it up. I can't remember what to DO with it once it's up, but I think it was good.

excon

Quote:

Originally Posted by excon

Hello sandy:

Well, I'm not elderly in that I creak when I walk. I don't shuffle. I can still run faster than my son (ok, that's not true - but don't tell him), and most importantly, I can still get it up. I can't remember what to DO with it once it's up, but I think it was good.

excon

If you'd just come here, I'd REMIND you what to do with it!

Quote:

Originally Posted by excon

I think it was good.

It was good for me baby! :D

Yesterday, Thursday was definitely fun. Can we do it again next Thursday?

And (for all those wondering about it) you were super duper. So there all you want to bees.

Quote:

Originally Posted by twinkiedooter

Yesterday, Thursday was definitely fun. Can we do it again next Thursday?

And (for all those wondering about it) you were super duper. So there all you wanna bees.

We're going to need details Twinkie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by artlady

The only help for you is to have your needs answered and it seems to me you have a lot of willing women out there,you old dawg :)
My BF is 54 and he is like a teenager so I don't think it goes away,you just have to grin and bare it :)

Yep... Interesting Ex that all the women just came out of the woodwork... stumbling all over themselves... :D :p:)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stringer

Yep....Interesting Ex that all the women just came out of the woodwork....stumbling all over themselves... :D :p:)

OMG! You're right.

That man is so darn lucky and he doesn't even realize it. All he has to do is crook his little finger and we all come running.

Girls, we have to play hard to get. Make him work for it. :cool:

I suppose that some just have the pheromones... :)

May I suggest the "fleshlight"

-tee he he heee

Quote:

Originally Posted by mudweiser

may I suggest the "fleshlight

Hello muddy:

I thought you were getting in line. Instead you offer me a portable pu$$y.

Young wippersnapper...

excon

Quote:

Originally Posted by excon

Hello muddy:

I thought you were getting in line. Instead you offer me a portable pu$$y.

Young wippersnapper...

excon

I wish I could describe my smile right about now.

Oh and excon, just to clear up...

I wasn't talking about my vertical smile.

-giggle-

Quote:

Originally Posted by Altenweg

We're going to need details Twinkie.

Oh, Alty, I'm not one of those kiss and tell gals. I'm more of a kiss and smile. :D:D

And he IS a good dancer, too. I'm just waiting for his famous cheesecake. How about some lucious cheesecake for dessert next week, Exie, dear?:D

1 Attachment(s)

Quote:

Originally Posted by twinkiedooter

some lucious cheesecake

Here Ya Go

Attachment 28162

Exy makes cheesecake?

I'm in! :)

Yes, Alty. Exie made great cheesecake when he was on the oil rig in the middle of the ocean.

And no, Cat, that's not the kind of cheesecake I was thinking of. It's the kind that you put a fork in and put a piece in your mouth and savor.

Alty, maybe if you asked Exie pretty please if he would share his recipe with us he will. This was on the cooking board that he said he made dynamite cheesecake.

I don't want the recipe, I want to be served, in bed, after a massage and great sex.

Is it white chocolate cheese cake? If it is, I'll be Exy's slave. Sigh. I'm craving the cheese cake.

Quote:

Originally Posted by twinkiedooter

Yes, Alty. Exie made great cheesecake when he was on the oil rig in the middle of the ocean.

And no, Cat, that's not the kind of cheesecake I was thinking of. It's the kind that you put a fork in and put a piece in your mouth and savor.

Alty, maybe if you asked Exie pretty please if he would share his recipe with us he will. This was on the cooking board that he said he made dynamite cheesecake.

Mine isn't forked, but otherwise...