Ask Me Help Desk - Couldn't penetrate my girlfriend during sex

My girl says she is not a virgin, but I am. We are both 21, tried to have sex after she beged for it but I couldn't fuly penetrate, but I could easily finger her. She thinks my penis is too big, but I know that there is no such thing as a penis that's too big to fit in a vagina right... Wat should I do to satisfy her and myself.

Wanted to have sex with my girfriend but had a problem with the condom, it just wouldn't roll down. Seems like it was too small for my penis. My girl tried to help me but embarasingly I ejaculated in the process. She saw how embarased I was and quickly told me it was no big deal, what else can she sa... Last time we wanted to make love but I had difficulty penetrating and then I ejaculated as I was still trying to penetrate, didn't use protection and it was supposed to be our first time. I have been masturbating since 14 now I'm 21yrs. I want to know if this problem is caused by mastubation or something else and how do I solve it, I so badly want to make passionate love to my lover, she deserves the best of me.

Are you using any type of lube ?

Forelay, foreplay and more foreplay. Lube, comdom goes without saying.

You should be "teasing", not "inserting". Don't try to insert, but rather touch her and with draw multiple times. The more you do this hopefully the wetter she will become.

When she is ready for it, she'll almost beg if things go right. Since you're the virgin so to speak, have her guide it in. Then hopefully you can play "Hide the salami"

Please don't double post your questions:

Here is what you said on your second thread:

Quote:

Sex with my girlfriend seems imposible.
Wanted to have sex with my girfriend but had a problem with the condom, it just wouldn't roll down. Seems like it was too small for my penis. My girl tried to help me but embarasingly I ejaculated in the process. She saw how embarased I was and quickly told me it was no big deal, what else can she sa... Last time we wanted to make love but I had difficulty penetrating and then I ejaculated as I was still trying to penetrate, didn't use protection and it was supposed to be our first time. I have been masturbating since 14 now I'm 21yrs. I want to know if this problem is caused by mastubation or something else and how do I solve it, I so badly want to make passionate love to my lover, she deserves the best of me.

Sarah

Please merely "answer" your own question to add more info, do not ask the same question more than once

Ok so the only problem I can see is that you can't fit "it" inside her. Why not, you don't know how, where, etc.. Or it won't physically fit. If this is the case then you have to make sure she's turned on, wanting it, prepared "down there" to take it, and yes try using some sort of lube.

Being self-conscious of your member is a waste-of-time. There is almost nothing you can do about it. Whether its too big or too small. Its just the way you are. No need to fret. Satisfy her other ways, using your digits or mouth.

Hope this helps!

Rick

If you are ejaculating too easily,masturbate a few hours before you are going to have sex.
Relax!
Know that like anything else in this life,practice makes perfect or at least pretty darn close :)

Is it posible to have a penis that can't fit into a vagina... That scares me now

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nzou

Is it posible to have a penis that can't fit into a vagina... That scares me now

I'm sorry honey but you can't be THAT big.

She just needs to be very relaxed and you need to use lubricant (as already mentioned)

A woman's vagina isn't a rigid piece of pipe, they do stretch as the woman becomes more comfortable and with a little foreplay.

A baby can pass her vaginal opening. I am sure your penis is not as big as a baby head. Furthurmore... you should always wear a condom. As it takes only one little sperm to make a baby!

A penis as big as a baby's head! Lol. I understand now, il use a condom always but no 1 has responded to my isue on condoms, people I couldn't put one on, it was too small and so oily that my fingers couldn't roll it on, wats the trick guys

They have extra large condoms at the store.. should do the trick.. it's good that you're trying to practice safe sex.. keep it up (no pun intended) ;)

I did as you told me, foreplay the way it should be done, until she practically begged me to have sex with her. I tried again to penetrate but couldn't, only got a 3rd of my penis in. I tried to go deeper but just couldn't again. Now I don't know what's going on. We decided to just stop as the momentum had faded, later on she saw blood on her pants. Please help me understand what's going on.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nzou

I did as you told me, foreplay the way it should be done, til she practicaly begged me to have sex with her. I tried again to penetrate but couldnt, only got a 3rd of my penis in. I tried to go deeper but just couldnt again. Now i dont know whats goin on. We decided to just stop as the momentum had faded, later on she saw blood on her pants. Please help me understand whats going on.

Blood in her pants could be because her hymen broke.

How old are you and your girlfriend? If it was asked and answered before then I apologize.

Listen... IF you was doing it right it will go on... Haven't you ever seen the stand up comedy routines where a guy pulls a condom over his head and inflates it? That's not a gag condom... thats the average size condom. THey do stretch an incredible amount.

There isn't a human alive and there never has been a human alive that a condom won't fit.

And most guys seem to think they are way larger than they really are. Like was said. If a baby can pop out of there... it isn't too small for your penis.

I suggest she see her gynecologist.

You got your penis in there. You are no longer a virgin. If you can just slide in half way, don't try to squeeze it all in her at once. There's no need. The friction with just half your penis inside her will be enough for both of you for right now. I also suggest she see her GYN, as the whole penis should be able to go into her.
Then, if that does not help, see your doctor to see if there is soething going on with your penis.

Oh people, that's his first girlfriend he's sleeping with. My current boyfriend told me the same thing about his first girlfriend. He couldn't penetrate her fully. He said the same things as the OP. but not that his penis was too big, but her vagina was too small as she was a very short girl. Lol, I'm sorry. And the whole premature ejacuation thing, don't worry about it, you'll get better with practice, I promise you!

So what is it then? I guess if he was a virgin before, he just didn't know how to do it right. It's not a big deal though. How many times did you have sex? Do you worry you lost your virginity too late? Do you worry you're not satisfying her and are afraid of her past experience? Well stop it all if you do. You'll figure it all out in time. Once again, practice makes perfect.

On the condom issue, if you are really having trouble, buy a larger size, they do make them.

But it is really a matter of practice, it is "hard" ( a pun included) at first to learn how, you practce at home by yourself if you need to

K um sorry but first of all it is possible for a penis to be too big mainly because she isn't relaxed enough but its not always easy to relax herself.

Quote:

Originally Posted by alexdawn

k um sorry but first of all it is possible for a penis to be too big mainly because she isnt relaxed enough but its not always easy to relax herself.

Not unless he is equine ( a horse) instead of human.

The problem was solved eventually. She just wasn't ready for sex with me. After all your advice,which I took, we did it eventually, I made sure that she got so turned on that she took me in, herself, we had to use the morning after pill afterwards. Got bigger condoms, a piece of cake, easy to put on. The new problem is premature ejaculations. I ejaculate soon after penetration, she orgasms after me though because I stay in for a bit longer. How do I control myself. Masturbating before sex delays my ejaculation too much and she ends up not enjoying anymo since sex becomes too long.

Firstly, just want to clarify something from your earlier posts in case you ever have any penetration issues again.

It is possible for a woman's vagina to be too tight for penetration if she is anxious - Google vaginismus if you want more information. Basically she involuntarily tenses her internal muscles.

Now, onto your current problem.

There is something called the 'squeeze method' that can be used to train yourself out of premature ejacutlation.
This method involves either the man or his partner squeezing (fairly firmly) the end or the tip of the penis for 10 to 20 seconds when ejaculation is imminent, withholding stimulation for about 30 seconds, then continuing stimulation. This can be repeated until ejaculation is desired.

Secondly it is possible to buy desenitisation cream. Ask at your pharmacist or Google it if shy.

Thirdly you can experiment with masturbating some time, but not immediately before, sex to try and find the ideal time between self-pleasuring and sex in terms of its affect on your ejaculation.

Finally, this problem is most common when sex is new, exciting, and anxiety prone. The less you worry about it and the more you enjoy practising the better it will get in time anyway.

Hope this helps. Have fun..

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nzou

The problem was solved eventualy. She just wasnt ready for sex with me. After all your advice,which i took, we did it eventualy, i made sure that she got so turned on that she took me in, herself, we had to use the morning after pill afterwards. Got bigger condoms, a piece of cake, easy to put on. The new problem is premature ejaculations. I ejaculate soon after penetration, she orgasms after me tho coz i stay in for a bit longer. How do i control myself. Masturbating before sex delays my ejaculation too much and she ends up not enjoying anymo since sex becomes too long.

Why did you have to use the morning after pill? Always use protection. If you don't have any, don't have sex.

As for ejaculating too soon, you're new to sex, it happens. As you get more experienced you'll last longer. It's part of the learning process.

Okay, will see if the squeeze method works. I've neva heard of it but will try it out. Thanks a lot.

Everyone's comments are goog. Forplay is very important.

Some condoms also come with lubricant that contains benzocaine which is an anaesthetic that numbs the penis a bit to make the man last longer. I don't know if this actually works as I am not a man but maybe it is worth a try?
I know that with time premature ejaculation is likely to get better. It can be a problem at the start of a relationship. Try not to get anxious about it.

Good that you got bigger condoms. Some men can't fit the usual size. Make sure that you always have your size available somewher near. If you are really big, then using smaller condoms makes them more likely to break (if you can get it on that is!)

By the way. A big penis is a good thing!

Vaginas come in different sizes just like penises. A penis should be able to go in every vagina, but for some women if they have a small vagina, a big penis might not fit ALL the way in. It is just a matter of what feels comfortable for both of you.You don't have to go ALL the way in to enjoy sex. Listen to your girlfriend andsee what she likes, what makes her feel comfortable.

If you have a big penis, it is good to start with slow and superficial thrusts first. This will relax the vagina and make it easier for you to thrust deeper.

Good luck