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Quote:
Originally Posted by closefriend29
Oh! So your wife knows that you love this other woman and give her sex so as to spare her pain? Or is it you keep from letting your wife know that you love someone else as to spare her pain? Either way, unless your wife says so, she might not be happy so your sacrifice might not be much of a sacrifice after all.
I realised one thing- love hurts, it can be the greatest and worst feeling in the world, reason I was surprised about how much you masterbate was because I don't know anyone who does it that often- I am sorry I offended you. Everyone has their problems, but I think you are brave and noble staying with your wife while dating someone else, but best think to do is see if both of the ladies love you the way you love them, because sex and love are not the same thing
I don't understand what you mean when you ask what I want to say really. I'm not avoiding saying anything to you. If you have put a post on here then I believe you are asking for my honest and unbias opinion along with everyone else's.
Personally I think that one of your main duties to your wife is to be faithful. I'm sure nearly all (I don't pretend to know anything or even a little about them all) religions insist on fidelity, even those who believe that only the woman should be.
You say you don't want your kids to suffer, but how do you think your children will feel if they ever find out? And your wife, how do you think she would feel to know that the person you are saving all of your passion for is not her?
And when, do you suppose, you wife and children will stop needing you? I am 23 and I was really sick last week, so I went to stay with my mother because I still need her. That isn't going to change. When I have my own children I am certain I will need her then too.
I guess my point is that no happiness can come from this situation. You can't be with the person you seem to believe is your soul mate. Because of this your wife can not be with hers because it can't be you if you can cheat on her this way. Your children will eventually see this and it will affect how they view realitioships in the future and could compramise the way they feel towards you.
Also, when you are with this other woman I am guessing that you lie to your wife and children to do so? Surely that cannot be comfortable, although if it is I would be concerned.
I know that you did not ask for a lecture about morality, just advice on holding out, but since you put this information on her I think you were asking for comment. Plus, the act of having an affaire itself suggests you are struggling to hold back in the area you should be doing so as well as the area you asked about.
Can I ask, if this was the other way around, and this was your wife with another man, how would you feel? Your wife is probably already suspicious anyway because if your sex drive used to be so high and now you never iniciate sex with her, she is probably concerned and putting herself through the torture many women on here do.
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