Ask Me Help Desk - Could he be?

Quote:

Originally Posted by kp2171

i think some men are "pretty", some are handsome, some are both, some are neither and still not necessarily unattractive.

the young brad pitt. pretty.

denzel washington. handsome.

orlando bloom. pretty.

johnny depp. pretty, but can absolutely pull off handsome. when? clean cut in a suit.

hard to explain. my ex and i would usually be on the same page when talking about men and attractiveness.

she hated boxing, but would love to watch evander hollyfield jump rope with his shirt off. she liked guys who couldnt fit into her pants. broad shoulders. linebacker material.

my cousin would constantly disagree with her. she liked "waify" men. skinny. young looking. no ruggedness.

i acknowledge a fairly wide range of "handsome"... i wouldnt put either mel or jude on my "if i was gay" list... but i dont get too confused if either are mentioned.

jack black... thatll confuse me. but to each ones own. its why our species survives.

I think Sam Elliott is the hunkiest man in the world and his voice is like
So... well it's like.. pure unadulterated MAN!! :cool: Bruce Willis... ;)

Id kill for elliots voice.

If I could change one thing about me, it wouldn't be my shape or form. I have control over that. I can force myself into place.

My voice... its pedestrian. Uninteresting. Unremarkable. Id buy me some bass and gravel.

Knew a girl in med school who was wet for her anatomy teacher. He wasn't much to look at... but he had The Voice... and apparently all the women in the class would go to lecture, close their eyes, and listen to his voice undress them.

I'm not complaining too loudly. Grateful I have my grandfathers stature and shoulders. Just woudlnt complain if my voice was a bit more distictive.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kp2171

id kill for elliots voice.

if i could change one thing about me, it wouldnt be my shape or form. i have control over that. i can force myself into place.

my voice... its pedestrian. uninteresting. unremarkable. id buy me some bass and gravel.

knew a girl in med school who was wet for her anatomy teacher. he wasnt much to look at... but he had The Voice... and apparently all the women in the class would go to lecture, close their eyes, and listen to his voice undress them.

im not complaining too loudly. grateful i have my grandfathers stature and shoulders. just woudlnt complain if my voice was a bit more distictive.

I would have Demi Moores voice... :cool:

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopeless3200

Sometimes I swear my man is gay or at least bi. He has many gay tendencies BUT he loves going down on me and loves to touch my special spot.

Recently though, he told me he no longer likes to have sex while on my period. Before, he didn't mind it. Now he says "It's gross."

Thoughts?

Speaking as a guy... the issue is there is more work involved to not make a huge mess... a small degree of odor during her period.

What it is likely is simply this... early enough in the relationship, you just want to hit it... whenever and wherever you can... you are new, fresh... not routine yet. Eventually its simply enough of an inconvienience due to the prep and post coitus cleanup that urge isn't nearly as compelling.

The gay aspect has been well covered and I can't add anything to that. But I don't see it as him being gay, or even having gay tendencies in any way shape or form. After all, its obvious he loves taco... and not Salami.

I also don't see it as being anything you have or should have done. Its simply the novelty has worn off the early part of the relationship.

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopeless3200

Thank you everyone for the much needed self-awareness.

Indeed, I try anything and everything in my power to recreate what once was. Our relationship use to be this, use to be that and now it's no longer. That is the bigger picture here. I love this man with all my heart and I hate that we've changed so drastically. Everyday I worry something new about him. I'm a worry-wart.

I need to change that.

I think you are learning the lesson of 'relationships change'. Sometimes for the better-sometimes for the worse. Sometimes there are worse times before the better. A lot depends on what you are willing to put up with and if he can make the changes he needs to make to be a better partner, again.

You are dealing with an addicted person. It is going to affect the trust from the point that you found out until the moment the relationship ends, however it ends. Some of your worries may, in a way, seem 'silly' (like the gay part), but those worries might be masking deeper concerns (like the thought of him hiding his addiction and not getting help).

I know on the addiction thread someone already mentioned Al-Anon. I think a support group like it would help you see the 'big picture' and decide where to go from here.

Love him, but don't forget to love yourself. Good luck.

kp2171 agrees : you are sexy, smart, and sexy-smart. ;) I, however, am an idiot. Who knew?

You, an idiot? Not even a chance!