Quote:

---

Originally Posted by maddy308

yes the sex is good. but at times it puts a kink in our sex life. when i want it he rolls over an goes to bed if its at night or if during the day he says he has to go unload the dishwasher ect.. which makes me mad knowing what he just did an he doesnt want to make a effort to help me out. so a few hours later when he wants sex i wont, or even sometimes i just get mad at him. it makes we wonder why he is with me if he likes looking at porn stars with fake boobs an plastic sergury because im nothing likke that.

---

Timing is everything. Are you timing your wants for AFTER you think/know he has been masturbating? Are you accusing him of being too tired from masturbating when he rolls over and goes to sleep when he may just be tired and need sleep? Why didn't you go downstairs and let him know you were in the mood, too. Then you start the game playing and getting back at him. THAT will cause problems in your relationship. How many of his sessions are because you said no because you were upset with him for what he did (or you thought he did) earlier?

You said that you have told him you were interested in watching with him, but have you asked him to join you in watching? Is the only time that you initiate intimacy when you think he won't participate?

Do you masturbate or do you expect him to take care of all your needs? Quite, frankly, I am a firm believer in being able to pleasure yourself. It is how an individual learns what his/her own needs are both physically through touch and mentally through fantasy.

You are making yourself feel inadequate and insecure. From what you have written, he has sex with you more than he views porn and, maybe, masturbates (viewing does not mean acting every time.) However, you want to accuse him of not being into you because 2-4 times a week (not many times a day like some women deal with, not even daily) he masturbates.

Talk with him.

You are blowing this waaaaaaay out of proportion.

And if you can't talk to him about sex, you shouldn't be having sex with him anyway.

Seriously--how will you be able to talk to him about pregnancy and birth control and paying bills and getting kids to soccer practice if you can't talk to him about sex? And rest assured--if the communication is broken for SEX, it's broken other places too.

You need to TALK to him about it. You need to tell him you were snooping (because like it or not, you WERE snooping) and tell him what you found. Then tell him how you FEEL about it. Don't accuse him. Don't put it on him--this isn't about HIM, it's about YOU.

Then ask him to TALK to you about how HE feels about it.

Do NOT do this in lieu of sex. Don't even bring it UP when sex is on the table. Bring it up over dinner, or over doing the dishes together, or take a walk and talk about it.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by maddy308

we have sex pretty much every day.

---

so why is he doing this? Is he getting bored of me? It makes me feel kind of crappy about myself knowing he is getting off waching other girls and it makes me self conscious wondering if he rather look at them then me




It is hard to imagine a problem having sex every day.

It would seem he is not too bored (sex every day)

You have sex every day, he must spend a lot of time looking at you.

I don't think any woman fills a mans thoughts to the point he thinks of nothing else.

You have sex every day, I don't think you have a problem