I have read lots of things that say that some women will never have an orgasm. From the later stuff I have been reading, I believe all women are capable of having an orgasm. When you read about the anatomy, there seems no reason why any women couldn't. I think that for some women, the partner they are with hinders the process, or the psycological blocks that have developed with the woman. There are creams on the market that enhance sensitivity to the clitoris area. One I have used is V Cream, and it definitely helps in achieving orgasm sooner. The work has to be done on the psycological issues that are getting in the way too.

Nice post Iris.

Men take it for granted that they can have one, and I think women need to get theirs. It makes life richer... I can't imagine if I could never... waiting is fun... but never... I think it is a serious issue.

Iris09 where did you get this V Cream from?

Female Orgasm Climax Enhancement

www.vcream.com

The second post was actually the same as the first post, though due to a setting which I turned off, it bought through the first one. You can order online. I don't know where it is from, though I live in NZ and I had it within 5 days.

Amazing how this female subject can get lost in society.

If men could not orgasm it would be all over the airwaves....
Ha! it already is! VIVA VIAGRA/CIALIS...etc.

I'm very in love with my boyfriend, highly sexually attracted, and the sex is always amazing while it lasts but I never climax. He's very good at oral sex and outward stimulation but no matter how hard I try I can't orgasm. It's a big problem for me because he feels like its unfair that I always make him fiinish and I never really do. He feels sexually inadequate. I've tried almost every technique but none of them seem to work :(

A few questions.

How old are you?

Do you have good relationship with original birth parents?

Taking any meds?

Any violence in past - sexually or domestically?

I'm 19 and I have a good relationship with my mother, but I never lived with my father or had him in my life. I am taking focalin xr for ADHD but it usually increases my libido rather than diminishes it. And no I've never had any sexual/domestic violence. I feel like I have a very healthy libido and sexual mind/body, but I just can't seem to achieve a climax. I don't think I've ever had an orgasm in my entire life

I'd say you hit a few bulls eyes...

1) You are young. Many women do not orgasm in their teens or even early 20's. It takes practice and exploration - often by yourself.

2) No relationship with a parent makes the body protect itself in very subtle ways from being too vulnerable.

3) meds for depression or ADHD can cause a different sexual reaction and a lessening often of some responses.

My advice:

1) don't be in a rush to have sex or an orgasm.. focus on education and future... you may be young still.
2) see a therapist about your dad. Meet him if you can and close the loop at lunch or something.
3) check your meds to make sure they are needed and also not overprescribed in dosage.

Does that help? :-)


Ash

I got my first orgasm as a virgin around 16 years old... with the flexible shower head. I started having sex when I was 18 and while I have had a couple of great sexual partners I can only seem to get a mini orgasm where the build up starts but doesn't peak and rush into full-body tingling like I had experienced with the shower. I didn't try toys until I was 24 and even then it took a while to get used to them. It still takes me time to get off on my own, but most of the time I get to that little build up then Its like my mind/body is done even though I am not really satisfied.

Recently I had been staying at a hotel room alone and got curious about watching some porn... Which I have seen before, alone and with a partner, but it has never been something I really got into. This night it seemed to turn me on and I got an orgasm quite quickly and I think it was the noise of the couple that got me into the zone more than anything else... I think it just got me out of my mind and imagining just enjoying all the feelings and not thinking about how I might look or what might be better for my partner.
I know it is very psychological for me since it is hard for me to just stop thinking too much and just enjoying it. I do currently have a great sexual partner and I have been able to relax bit by bit more with him but still no big O

s2tp:

Same questions as above...

Quote:

---

1) How old were you when you "sorted it out"
2) What method did you choose? Was it simple after that? Automatic?
3) Did you think you were not orgasmic
4) Is there a misconception about the female orgasm you wanted to share that might help other women reach that elusive spot.
5) What was biggest challenge? Was it psychological? Physical?

---

1. I honestly don't remember. I'm one of the lucky ones, orgasm comes easy (pun intended) to me.

2. Any method works. I love vibrators, shower head, but with a partner is always best. Oral, fingering, you name it.

3. No.

4. Most women think that orgasm is only a physical response. The girl whose boyfriend thinks he's a failure because she hasn't had an orgasm doesn't realize that what's in her head is much more important then the spot you touch or feel. The fact that she said "No matter how hard I try" really brings it home. This is not something you "try" to make happen. This is a natural response that your body has if you're at ease, comfortable with yourself, your body and that of the person you're with.

5. I haven't had to deal with the challenge, but, from what I've found out from other women, I'd say most of it's psychological.

Did that help? ;)

The first man I was with just kept 'trying'. When I began learning there was more to it that the physical thing, it became quite a turnoff, as he used to be trying so hard that he would be screwing up his face. I used to keep saying to him that I would rather enjoy his attention etc. He always had my orgasm as the final goal. A lot of expectation, especially if I wasn't able to. And he felt like a failure for all the years we were together.

Did you try vibrators inside and out?

One thing to add... the "come hither" finger move on the g-spot can work when a woman cannot climax from clitoral stimulation... Insert middle and index fingers and pull up and towards you. It can do wonders if she talks you into the spot as you explore.

I'm very inexperienced; first boyfriend, 23 years old, been having sex for just 5 months, but I did have an orgasm for the first time about a week ago :) Before that, I did get a lot of pleasure out of oral, got all those tingling sensations, but didn't really climax in the end. The other day he fingered me and found my g-spot, and with very soft movements he stimulated both that and my clitoris. And it worked! It was so strong, my whole side was tingling for like 10 minutes afterwards.

I can hardly answer the questions at the first post, since I don't think that this will work every time, as I'm still at the beginning. I'm just happy I felt that even if it was that one time, and he was very proud of himself too :p

I guess I should try to masturbate more, explore my body, but where I come from, masturbation is considered to be bad. Such a shame really!

Quote:

---

1) How old were you when you "sorted it out"
2) What method did you choose? Was it simple after that? Automatic?
3) Did you think you were not orgasmic
4) Is there a misconception about the female orgasm you wanted to share that might help other women reach that elusive spot.
5) What was biggest challenge? Was it psychological? Physical?

---

I have never had any serious problems with this.
1) I had it sorted out by the time I was 14 or so. My first boyfriend was when I was about 18 and I don't remember any significant problems.
4) To me, the misconception is that excitement is always clitoral and that ALL women have trouble.

I also don't believe very many women are "frigid." I hate that word. I think women haven't explored enough or their partners are impatient or inconsiderate. I think it's easy to get into bad habits with sex, including not knowing that it's not a duty you have to do. Don't put up with lousy lovers! The worst sex I ever had was with the best looking guy I ever dated. Yuck.

Sex should be something you can't wait to do.

I also remember a woman who could get "almost there" and then she siad the pressure in her head was "too much" - since pressure built in her forehead and she didn't know "HOW" to release into an orgasm... never solved that one.