If he is hiding; he is lying... If you have yet to discuss anything with him you might want to do so and quick since it is bothering you... Also it amazes me that marriage of union and commitment can now be categorized as "open"... When you make a relationship like yours and your husbands open then I see failure written all over it. I hope all goes well for you but it seems as if that by the small chance that your husband is not gay and just using you for what he thinks to be "ethical" reasons he is bi and there is a possibility that he can become attracted to men... My question now is has he always liked receiving anal since you could rememeber or is this a new development?

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Originally Posted by Kagan88

If he is hiding; he is lying... If you have yet to discuss anything with him you might want to do so and quick since it is bothering you... Also it amazes me that marriage of union and committment can now be categorized as "open"... When you make a relationship like yours and your husbands open then I see failure written all over it. I hope all goes well for you but it seems as if that by the small chance that your husband is not gay and just using you for what he thinks to be "ethical" reasons he is bi and there is a possibility that he can become attracted to men... My question now is has he always liked recieving anal since you could rememeber or is this a new development?

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Exactly HOW does this make him gay or bi? Does a woman who likes to receive oral become gay or bi since a woman can also do that quite well?

Is the OP in such a relationship where they are both exceptionally open and enjoy things like fisting, oral, anal, and a slew of other things... or is there at least a sense of repression of closed mindedness about certain acts between them, real or perceived by either of them? That can explain far more.

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Originally Posted by smoothy

Exactly HOW does this make him gay or bi? Does a woman who likes to recieve oral become gay or by since a woman can also do that quite well?

Is the OP in such a relationship where they are both exceptionally open and enjoy things like fisting, oral, anal, and a slew of other things....or is there at least a sense of repression of closed mindedness about certain acts between them? That can explain far more.

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My opinions are on what I have experienced because all I know is that... First if her husband is hiding anything and lying to her where is the trust? Isn't that what a relationship is built on... trust and communication? I feel as if you start to lose that then you lose the relationship. I don't know everything but I also don't know very many men that like receiving anal (that must be given from a man) and are not bi and or gay but then again that is just me... I know there must be men out there who do that and are not either. Once again my comment was based on just my experiences.

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Originally Posted by Kagan88

My opinions are on what I have experienced because all I know is that... First if her husband is hiding anything and lying to her where is the trust? Isn't that what a relationship is built on...trust and communication? I feel as if you start to lose that then you lose the relationship. I don't know everything but I also don't know very many men that like recieving anal (that must be given from a man) and are not bi and or gay but then again that is just me... I know there must be men out there who do that and are not either. Once again my comment was based on just my experiences.

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And so are mine... YOU may not have dated guys that were willing to tell you that... but anal doesn't have to be given by a man... the fact you believe it does shows a bit of your personal bias is what I'm saying. Women have fingers, women have hands... and if fewer women had sexual repression on many issues that is rampant in some countries... they might find a lot more pleasure themselves.. and find out a lot more they are just assuming. In most cases incorrectly.

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Originally Posted by smoothy

And so are mine....YOU may not have dated guys that were willing to tell you that....but anal doesn't have to be given by a man....the fact you believe it does shows a bit of your personal bias is what I'm saying. Women have fingers, women have hands...and if fewer women had sexual repression on many issues that is rampant in some countries....they might find a lot more pleasure themselves..and find out a lot more they are just assuming. In most cases incorrectly.

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The OP stated it had to be given by a man and I am not bias by any means... Just interesting topics through here that I read and respond to... Not trying to start anything.

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Originally Posted by Kagan88

The OP stated it had to be given by a man and I am not bias by any means... Just interesting topics through here that I read and respond to...Not trying to start anything.

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The OP has a clear bias in that case... LOTS of married couples enjoy butt play... the men and the women (and both being hetero... not bi or gay). That's one thing that a man and woman can share as the feelings would be identical for them. Assuming one of them wasn't of the opinion that missionary is the only way THEY will have sex, and get argumentative if they are asked to stray from that. Then expect them to be one of those complaining about why they have sex only once a month after only a few years of marriage.

Either way, the HIDING is the issue, not whether their marriage is open---which, by the way, works for MANY couples, just not closed-minded couples who have insecurity and trust issues.

So the PROBLEM isn't that their relationship is open. The PROBLEM is that if something has to be hidden, then the trust isn't there.

Mr. Pot and Mr. Kettle will now stand in opposite corners and CUT THE CRAP OUT.

Either stay on topic or go to another forum.