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Originally Posted by jlh76

I couldn't agree more. If he's really into it AND really cares about you enough to help you ease into it you won't be able to help but like it.

Another thing to try is let him try penetration in the doggystyle postition, this enables you to pull away and also gives you both (especially you) fairly easy access for cliteral stimulation. This will really help you get into it.

Above all, RELAX, don't think about the taboo parts and enjoy!!

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It helps to lay on your side. He can either be on his knees or lying behind you.

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Originally Posted by excon

Hello:

I'm not sure what an anal plug is, but a finger works pretty good too. Frankly, it's even BETTER, because if he's into your anus, he's going to WANT his fingers and his tongue in there too.

If he's REALLY into it like that, you WILL be too. Promise!

excon

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Ex:

Try this site. There is a picture.

En.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_plug

Butt plugs (or anal plugs) are sex toys designed to be inserted in the anus and rectum for sexual pleasure. In some ways, they are similar to a dildo, but they tend to be shorter, and to have a flared end to prevent the device from being lost inside the rectum. Many dildos lack a flared end, and thus it is ill-advised to use such dildos anally, since they may get stuck, requiring medical extraction.

People of all genders and sexual orientations may use butt plugs.

Exactly my view

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Originally Posted by southerngalps

yeah, it sounds gross, but that was the first time i actually enjoyed anal sex.

my boyfriend prepped me by licking around the anus and tickling me with his lips. he didn't lick the actual anus.

he did that for a good five minutes and it went in like i never thought could be possible.

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Try it fresh from a shower or bath... then its safe, clean and fun.

What I ussually do is I start to have sex and when I'm really wet his penis is wet so we start slowley with the head of the penis until it doesn't hurt (I don't use lube, some hurt like KY yours and mine it burns do not use it) probley use like a water based lubracant if that.
We just go from sex to anal sex to anal moving in little at a time of course even when you think you're ready to go in all the way add more

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Originally Posted by Rachel005

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we just go from sex to anal sex to anal moving in little at a time of course even when you think youre ready to go in all the way add more

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You are not supposed to have anal sex and then put it in the vagina without washing the penis first.

This can cause a serious infection.

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Originally Posted by southerngalps

you are not supposed to have anal sex and then put it in the vagina without washing the penis first.

this can cause a serious infection.

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I'll second that, use a fresh condom when doing this or visit the bathroom and wash up well first if you aren't. Why subject yourself to a vaginal infection when simple precaustions will avoid it.

You can move from the vagina directly to the rectum without trouble. (as I believe she had said she did)... but do not move non-stop from the rectum to the vagina.

Tell him you'll start having more anal sex when he lets you regularly start sticking a 20 oz. bottle up his rectum... deal? Seriously... not all are made for anal sex and it is very bad for your rectum also. Fissures and hemmroids are something to consider..

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Originally Posted by KellyAlexander

Tell him you'll start having more anal sex when he lets you regularly start sticking a 20 oz. bottle up his rectum.....deal? Seriously....not all are made for anal sex and it is very bad for your rectum also. Fissures and hemmroids are something to consider..

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Ummm exaggerating quite a lot aren't you?. I'm a guy in his 40's and not once have I ever seen a schlong in the locker room that was anywhere near the size of a 20 oz bottle.

And 17 years into a marriage my petite wife as not once suffered from any of those. And I am no Pee Wee Herman.

It sounds like this is very much your husbands idea. If you are not really interested then it will more than likely be painful. Only do what you are comfortable with.

I haven't read anything from the OP that states she is not in to trying it. In fact she states that they have tried, but failed. No where did she say I don't want to do this, it's his idea, so I need help to figure it out.

Listen hun, there are several ways to ease in to it, and maybe this experience won't be what you were thinking it would be. Maybe it will suck and maybe you will find you like it.

I've seen good advice about cleaning out your system prior to anal sex, but it's good advice for him to wear a condom too.

As for making it work, there are many products out there made specifically to desensitize. I think one of them is actually called Anal-EZ? Don't know haven't tried it.

The only time I could make this work for me, was when I got sloppy drunk LOL

At least one hour after a Boel Movement to as namy as 3 or 4 you will find the carage empty and unclutered.

Look at it as a garage door that's not been opened for a long time and is a little stiff. Take it slow and it will open, once you get it open then the next time will be easier... You don't just go and kick down the door.

I used to be one of those "HELL NO' kind of girls and then I found someone that knew what they were doing. A lot of the home party plans or sex shops have Anal Eaze. It's a numbing cream that should be applied to the anal opening about 7-8 minutes before entry. Use lubrication and a real one - SPIT IS NOT LUBRICANT for anal sex!! Next go with some anal beads. They're usually made of silicone and have beads that start very small and end bigger. While he is having vaginal sex with you, he should start inserting the anal beads smallest to largest until it becomes uncomfortable. SLOWLY pulling it out - it's not a rip cord, you should do this a couple times until there is no pain. It can be rather enjoyable but it is definitely not something to rush into it. My guy knew what he was doing and wanted it to be just as enjoyable for me as it was for him.

Since you are willing to try it, use LOTS of lube and go slowly. If at any point you decide that this is definitely way more fun for your husband than it is for you, it's your right to say no. Also, ask him if it's o.k. if you "peg" him. If you're not a Dan Savage fan, that's the term for a woman strapping on a dildo and engaging in anal sex with her man that way. In fact, even if you're fine with being the "receiver" of anal sex, I think you should ask him anyway. Why shouldn't he enjoy what is supposed to be so enjoyable for you? :D

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Originally Posted by Ren6

Why shouldn't he enjoy what is supposed to be so enjoyable for you?

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Hello Ren:

So, I suppose you go down on chicks (if you're a chick), because you want to experience what HE does... Or the other way around if you're a guy... But, you get what I mean..

Of course, the truth is, he's NOT supposed to experience the same thing his girlfriend does. That's what makes is DIFFERENT...

I don't know why you can't get that. Maybe it's cause you enjoy experiencing the SAME stuff your partner does... MOST ordinary people don't do that...

excon

Actually, Ex-Con, I do go down on chicks, but that's beside the point.

I know what it's like to be in the OP's place and I heard all the reasoning- "If you do it right, it doesn't hurt", if you go slow, it's great"... Some minor but painful damage later, it turned out not to be my cup of tea. Some people love it- heck, the O.P. may end up enjoying it immensely... but, if she doesn't like it, even just a little bit, she should be given a pass on this one.

As for her partner not being expected to experience what she does, well, why the heck not? Why should he not experience this amazing feeling? My point is that he should be absolutely willing to do this, especially if his partner develops a yearning to strap it on and have at him, right? If she goes slow and uses lots of lube, it should be pleasurable for him. Just saying. What's good for the goose is good for the gander, as my dear old gramps used to say.

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Originally Posted by Ren6

As for her partner not being expected to experience what she does, well, why the heck not? Why should he not experience this amazing feeling? My point is that he should be absolutely willing to do this,

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Hello again, R:

I don't like oysters. I've never tried them. I actually DON'T have to try them to know that I don't want to. Now, there are some people out there who think they're "amazing". My point is that, just because some people think they're amazing doesn't mean that I should try them. It just doesn't.

Now, I know you UNDERSTAND that logic. But, somehow, not when it comes to sex. I don't know why. I think you've got some underlying issues that you're not copping to.

excon

Actually, Ex---I'm kind of with her on this one.

Anal sex CAN be extremely pleasurable for her---but most of the time it's NOT.

And I've always told any guy that INSISTED on it, any guy that HAD to have it on HIS terms and not when *I* initiated it that I'd be happy to let him RECEIVE anal sex.

So it's not that I would enjoy that the same WAY that he'd enjoy pitching, but dammit, if he's going to be PUSHY about it, I'll give him something to push back against.

Frankly, I blame most women who are against anal sex on men that are too pushy about anal sex--and men that have NO technique at it other than just insert-push-pull.

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Originally Posted by excon

Hello again, R:

I don't like oysters. I've never tried them. I actually DON'T have to try them to know that I don't want to. Now, there are some people out there who think they're "amazing". My point is that, just because some people think they're amazing doesn't mean that I should try them. It just doesn't.

Now, I know you UNDERSTAND that logic. But, somehow, not when it comes to sex. I dunno why. I think you've got some underlying issues that you're not copping to.

excon

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The funny thing here is that to me, your response indicates that you have issues that you're not copping to, Ex-Con.

Your lobster analogy doesn't do much for your case.
Imagine the poster's husband does not like oysters. Like you, he knows he doesn't want oysters ANYWHERE in his body. However, he really, really wants his wife to enjoy oysters because he heard how amazing they can be and he really gets excited by his wife trying "oysters". Wife tries oysters and she isn't thrilled by them, either. Imagine that OP's hubby insist she try oysters with lemon, or in a bisque- but she still doesn't like them. Is the fact that she doesn't like oysters in her head? Or should her husband acknowledge that like him, she is just not that into "oysters"?

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Originally Posted by Ren6

Actually, Ex-Con, I do go down on chicks, but that's beside the point.

I know what it's like to be in the OP's place and I heard all the reasoning- "If you do it right, it doesn't hurt", if you go slow, it's great"... Some minor but painful damage later, it turned out not to be my cup of tea. Some people love it- heck, the O.P. may end up enjoying it immensely...but, if she doesn't like it, even just a little bit, she should be given a pass on this one.

As for her partner not being expected to experience what she does, well, why the heck not? Why should he not experience this amazing feeling? My point is that he should be absolutely willing to do this, especially if his partner develops a yearning to strap it on and have at him, right? If she goes slow and uses lots of lube, it should be pleasurable for him. Just saying. What's good for the goose is good for the gander, as my dear old gramps used to say.

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If there was damage, someone wasn't doing it right. Your average poop is no smaller than your average guy is.

But both parties do have to be willing and open to even try. Otherwise the reaction is to clamp down rather than relax. And you can't enjoy it unless you relax. And no you can NEVER force it. The first time or two is going to be uncomfortable. I doubt you liked that first cup of coffee you ever tried. Or that first drink of Booze.