Choux is very right! I'm am going through the same thing right now and I know how it feels. I love my boyfriend so much, but I don't feel like I could give him my heart in that way. I could love him as family or friendship. I don't want to get hurt down the road. He is the greatest, nicest guy I have ever met. I know that for years I have been wanting a guy like this. He is so good too me, but it just feels like he doesn't want to know he's gay ither. He told me one of his biggest secrets and has never told anyone else. He was molested by another male at 9 years old... he is now 20 years old and has never had a girlfriend until me. He use to be overwieght during high school and has now lost all of his weight. He is still very self conscious about his appearance but it could still be because of his wieght before. At first I felt like he was the one and we were together for a "reason" and, but now I'm starting to feel like the reason is to help him. He is always very emotional and I understand its very hard for him what he went through and I know he was confused but I still feel he is confused. He is very homophobic and I have actually talked about it with him. I also told him its very natural for someone who has been exposed to sexuality that young to react that way to the same sex , it doesn't mean your gay unless you want to be with them or have feelings for them but sometimes your mind can't control your body , it just reacts to things. He didn't really have a response and he smiled and kissed me and told me he loves me, so that worried me a bit. There's also this one friend of his, not a close friend or anything, but he totally comes off as gay and I have met him, so oneday I was telling my boyfriend did you know he was gay and my boyfriend started to freakout and say no he's not! He can't be! I know he isn't! And this was after we have talked about being comfortable with homphobia and sexuality I just feel like I can't get it through to him that its okay, and he can't accept others, or maybe even himself. I don't know I'm also very confused if he is or not but I just always get this feeling and I have been reading a lot about this and have realized why would you get this feeling there is reasoning with it. But choux is right, only time will tell and if we are not meant to be , he will remain a very good friend, he is the closest I've ever been to another person so I'm thankful to have him in my life.

Choux is very right! I'm am going through the same thing right now and I know how it feels. I love my boyfriend so much, but I don't feel like I could give him my heart in that way. I could love him as family or friendship. I don't want to get hurt down the road. He is the greatest, nicest guy I have ever met. I know that for years I have been wanting a guy like this. He is so good too me, but it just feels like he doesn't want to know he's gay ither. He told me one of his biggest secrets and has never told anyone else. He was molested by another male at 9 years old... he is now 20 years old and has never had a girlfriend until me. He use to be overwieght during high school and has now lost all of his weight. He is still very self conscious about his appearance but it could still be because of his wieght before. At first I felt like he was the one and we were together for a "reason" and, but now I'm starting to feel like the reason is to help him. He is always very emotional and I understand its very hard for him what he went through and I know he was confused but I still feel he is confused. He is very homophobic and I have actually talked about it with him. I also told him its very natural for someone who has been exposed to sexuality that young to react that way to the same sex , it doesn't mean your gay unless you want to be with them or have feelings for them but sometimes your mind can't control your body , it just reacts to things. He didn't really have a response and he smiled and kissed me and told me he loves me, so that worried me a bit. There's also this one friend of his, not a close friend or anything, but he totally comes off as gay and I have met him, so oneday I was telling my boyfriend did you know he was gay and my boyfriend started to freakout and say no he's not! He can't be! I know he isn't! And this was after we have talked about being comfortable with homphobia and sexuality I just feel like I can't get it through to him that its okay, and he can't accept others, or maybe even himself. I don't know I'm also very confused if he is or not but I just always get this feeling and I have been reading a lot about this and have realized why would you get this feeling there is reasoning with it. But choux is right, only time will tell and if we are not meant to be , he will remain a very good friend, he is the closest I've ever been to another person so I'm thankful to have him in my life.

I'm not sure if he's gay or not. The only thing that brings the question up to me is the tight clothes (which doesn't mean he's gay,. I know guys that wear tight pants) and definitely the whole being naked in his friends room. Btw, there is nothing that states a straight guy can't acknowledge that another man is attractive... to say that is just ignorant to me.

However, I am going through a problem of my own and all of a sudden I'm questioning my sexuality...

I'd appreciate it if some you people who have been so helpful to TC would look at my question and try to answer it.

But the whole drinking thing with him... is just him out with mates. He's happy when drunk apparently... maybe too happy because of the naked part in a friends room. I know that I get really horny around girls I know if I'm drunk. So it seems to be somewhat of the same thing with him.

OK... maybe he isn't happy when he's drunk. But still I'm not too sure if I would worry about that. Also, you said that happened when he was DRUNK... you now say that he is sober. So there shouldn't be a problem anymore eh?

Did anyone notice this thread is from 2008?

Closed