Ask Me Help Desk - Son caught looking up porn

Quote:

Originally Posted by doogy

ok people its natural for a teen to sant to see porn if u paid attention in history which i guess yall havent 13&14 year old were gettin married and having more kids because ppl didnt live long that is the way the body works every one is able to be sexualy active at 13 or 14 i say regulate him teach him he needs to know about sex dont leave him to learn from internet kids who look at porn can turn out to be perfect gentlemen it all depends on you if u teach them right or wrong

If my 13 or 14 year old typed like you do, I'd take away his/her internet completely and give him/her a whole bunch of papers to type up until he/she realized that proper English does, indeed, matter.

I find it highly interesting that it's the teens that are advocating the idea "times have changed! Let the kid be!"... and yet every single porn site I have EVER been to asks if you are 18 or not.

I am ALSO still of the opinion that it would NOT have been pornography on YouTube. Scantily clad young women, probably, but not actual porn. There is a HUGE difference between the two.

Wow. Ask him where he found out about porn?

What I usually recommend is to install a porn scanner/porn cleaner on the son's computer that can find "hidden" porn on the computer that can otherwise be difficult to find. Tell him that you have installed the porn scanner on his computer and that he is not to uninstall it. SmutScanner is great for this. Knowing that his mother will know about his porn collection is usually enough to dramatically lessen the habit.

This also works for husbands :D

I don't get why kids feel the need to look up porn!! And don't pull that "it's normal at his age" crap, cause I'm sure it is in your eyes but Im 13 also and I've haven't looked up porn once in my life, it's not cause he's curious it's cause he's a rebbal!! Sure I feel the need for some porn every once in a while, but then I just tell myself I'm better than that!! Cause I am. I get made fun of at school because I don't masturbate and look at porn. But I'll be the one laughing when there rotting in HELL!! join me and pray for the ones who do things like that. Tell your son that he's better than that and if he needs to talk to someone his age about it leave your email and I'll send you my skype username.

This thread is a year old.

I doubt you'll be hearing from the OP for your skype name.

If someone would please tell me where on YouTube you could get porn, I'd be far more concerned about the entire thing.

As it stands, I think the mother is overrreacting.

Either way--why resurrect a thread that died out a year ago?

My thirteen year old son was caught on internet looking at porn about 6 months ago. He is not allowed on the internet when he's unsupervised.

I'm not mad at him, I think as parents we have to realize and remember they are just like we were, they will do anything they can get away with.

It isn't any different then what his dad did when he stole his dad's playboy its just easier to get ahold of raunchier porn thanks to the internet. So its our job to make sure there isn't access to that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by tawnynkids

1. Lock up the computer.
2. Do not ALLOW him to look at porn. Maybe he'd like a drink too?
3. Teach your son about love. Tell him about respecting another persons body and his own. Answer the questions, don't encourage an unhealthy attitude about women and sex.

For God's sake does nobody think that healthy attitudes about sex and love are issues to be taught to our children anymore. "Well it's only normal curious behavior...they're supposed to at that age". And that's why we have pregnant children. What they are supposed to do at that age is learn how to respect others and themselves, they are supposed to learn what it means to have a healthy relationship, they are supposed to learn what it means to value a person, honor them. They are not supposed to be fed crap that elicits dangerous addictions, degradation of others, to view women as objects instead of humans.

I hate that porn is so accepted in our society. Yes, boys will look at it, yes men will look at it but should it just be accepted? Sorry, no. What part of porn really leads you to learn to love someone else? It doesn't, it only self satisfies...that is not love! Maybe if we taught our boys better we'd have better men!

I love this answer! Being a single working parent I don't have a lot of control of TV or Internet. With a preteen and other teens in the house I opt to not have internet or cable. I haven't had it for 10 years. I don't bring porn into my home and yet I have still found it a time or two. You do what ever you can to prevent and protect and to teach love and respect. Still it may find a way to our kids, so then you destroy it.

Thread closed as it is over a year old.

It's perfectly natural for any boy hitting puberty to start liking girls and their bodies, just like girls start liking guys and their bodies. Let him have a magazine, because not only does the magazine NOT cause viruses, but he can hide it. What he is doing is absolutely natural, as natural as sex even. Unless you want him actually having sex while you're not looking, you'll break the boy off a piece, because he's just curious and confused. A lot of boys are. He'll start masturbating too. But at least he won't be getting girls pregnant... just yet. That's another talk for another day. Remember that porno isn't sex. It's much safer than sex.

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Originally Posted by nervey

I love this answer! Being a single working parent I don't have a lot of control of TV or Internet. with a preteen and other teens in the house I opt to not have internet or cable. I havn't had it for 10 years. I don't bring porn into my home and yet I have still found it a time or two. You do what ever you can to prevent and protect and to teach love and respect. Still it may find a way to our kids, so then you destroy it.

Wow, misandric much? Girls are also checking out boys, maybe not informally, but they're curious also. Porno is a seedy business, but unless you want Stepford children running amuck in your neighborhood, you'll let them have a break. Weigh this:

Stepford kids versus normal adolescent teens.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synnen

OKay...wait....

is this really porn? Or is it cute girls his own age in skimpy clothes? Is this actually nudity and sex acts? Or girls dancing around trying to be sexy?

There's a HUGE difference there!

Everyone's jumping all over the kiddy porn thing, and I'm doubting that the YouTube site would allow that in any way, shape, or form.

I have to agree here. I have never seen naked children on Youtube. YouTube constantly monitors edits and banns material on their site. It is unlikely he is seeing naked women or girls of ANY age on YouTube.

Being curious about naked girls is natrual for a child his age. Letting him look at porn is NOT natural for his age.