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    worried mom of 2's Avatar
    worried mom of 2 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 26, 2007, 12:44 PM
    When did I conceive?
    I'm a mother of 2 small kids, me and my feince have been trying to have a third child. On March 17 at about 2:00AM I had sex with another man. He pulled out, and I was very worried about that because I know that just doesn't work. I took a pregnant. Test on March18th was negative, another on the 21st- positive and another on the 25th- positive. Everything I've read has told me that you can't tell until 12- 15 days after sex if you are pregnant. Would I be safe to say that the chances of me being pregnant by this other guy are slim to none, and that my fience and I conceived a month earlier? Before March 16th- it was about 3 weeks when we last had sex. I've been feeling terrible, and very tired, and my breasts are tender. But I'm curious as to why the first test came negative if that was the case. It has been only 10 days since my mistake and am hoping and praying that we conceived earlier. Can you tell me which senario is more likely?
    Squiffy's Avatar
    Squiffy Posts: 499, Reputation: 84
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    #2

    Mar 26, 2007, 12:46 PM
    I would say baby is your fiancés. It is not likel;y you would have been fertile at the time you slept with the other man, if you got a pos result so soon after.
    missk's Avatar
    missk Posts: 517, Reputation: 44
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    #3

    Mar 26, 2007, 12:47 PM
    I think that you are more likely to be pregnant by your fiancé.
    alkalineangel's Avatar
    alkalineangel Posts: 2,391, Reputation: 323
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    #4

    Mar 26, 2007, 12:49 PM
    I would say the chances of getting a positive pregnancy test only 4 days after conception is pretty slim... Good luck to you and your family...
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #5

    Mar 26, 2007, 12:53 PM
    I have to agree with everyone else here.
    worried mom of 2's Avatar
    worried mom of 2 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Mar 28, 2007, 08:11 PM
    I hope that is the case- but if it were my fience- why would the test show negative on the 18th ( 2 days after the mistake sex) but positive on the 21/22nd ( 5 days after) that one was a light line then when I tested again on the 24th it was a darker line. My doctor says the chances of me being pregnant. By the other guy is slim, but I told him I didn't want to take the chance. I started felling sick on the 23rd on. I requested a blood test th test my levels of HGC because they should be high if I conceived in Febuary- but there again- why then on the 18th of march would the test come back negative? I also requested an ultrasound, so I have that on April 5th. If I conceived with this other guy that would make it 20 days, if I conceived with my man that would make me roughly a month and a week or so. If I go by what I've read on the internet the last few days- baby heart is detectable by 25 day, arm buds at 26 days and leg buds at 28 days, so would I be safe to say that if I heard a heartbeat when I go in and see other things that I'm 100% safe? I just don't want to take the chance of this destroying my family, which is what would happen if my man discovered I cheated on him let alone that our baby might not be his! Opinions please- I'm going out of my mind!!
    worried mom of 2's Avatar
    worried mom of 2 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Mar 28, 2007, 08:43 PM
    Well I just told my fience the news that I'm pregnant, I asked him when we had sex last and he said it was just before or just after his birthday ( March 2nd) does that make him a more likely senario than the other guy? I think it works a little better in my calculations, but any and all opinions are welcome. The more facts I can have the better.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #8

    Mar 28, 2007, 09:46 PM
    I think in 9 months you should have the DNA checked to be sure.

    Also I think that if you are sleeping with men ( and unprotected sex on top of that) you should not have wedding plans with someone else.
    And as long as more than one person knows, a secret will never be secret, you can assume at some point, this person will tell someone, and they tell someone, and a question on the baby will come up.

    Lets say in two years when this other persons decides to ask for a DNA test ? Starting a new relationship on a lie will never work, What if in 10 years during surgary or something, he notices the child's blood type does not match yours and his, So you have made the mess, your hubby to be deserves to know the truth, and not risk wasting years of his life to find out latter.
    missk's Avatar
    missk Posts: 517, Reputation: 44
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    #9

    Mar 29, 2007, 08:18 AM
    Amen father!!
    worried mom of 2's Avatar
    worried mom of 2 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Mar 29, 2007, 09:43 AM
    To the guy that said I shouldn't have wedding plans, u know I love my fience very very much, It was a drunken night which I will regret for the rest of my life. People make mistakes. If you have never made a mistake- then my god you are the only perfect person on the planet. This was a one time thing, that will never never never repeat itself again. I didn't go out and sleep with many strangers, it was a close friend, not that that makes it any better- because I know it doesn't, I have never cheated before in the 4 years I've been with him and never will again. I feel awful about it and I can't tell him because he would leave and try to take my other 2 kids. This is the most horrible situation I've ever been in and I am not willing to lose my family over this.
    PinkSlippers's Avatar
    PinkSlippers Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Mar 30, 2007, 10:28 AM
    Why don't you use one of those ovulation predictors that are all over the internet?
    Type in the date of your last period- then see which days you were most likely to get pregnant and who you were sleeping with at the time.
    I do agree though that it would be wrong of you not to tell your fiancé.
    He deserves to know. Of course people make mistakes... all people. But you should be fair here. For medical information, your child should know who his/her father is, God forbid anything should ever happen.
    tccat46's Avatar
    tccat46 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Apr 30, 2007, 09:58 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by worried mom of 2
    I'm a mother of 2 small kids, me and my feince have been trying to have a third child. On March 17 at about 2:00AM I had sex with another man. He pulled out, and I was very worried about that because I know that just doesnt work. I took a preg. test on March18th was negitive, another on the 21st- positive and another on the 25th- positive. Everything I've read has told me that you can't tell untill 12- 15 days after sex if you are pregnant. Would I be safe to say that the chances of me being pregnant by this other guy are slim to none, and that my fience and I concieved a month earlier? Before March 16th- it was about 3 weeks when we last had sex. I've been feeling terrible, and very tired, and my breasts are tender. but I'm curious as to why the first test came negitive if that was the case. It has been only 10 days since my mistake and am hoping and praying that we concieved earlier. Can you tell me which senario is more likely?
    Hi, I'm lead to believe that some tests can tell quite quickly if your pregnant or not, the first test may have come back as negative due to a lack of HCG levels?
    Sometimes people get one or more negative tests before a positive.
    If this is eating you up so much you may be better being honest with your fiancé and finding out after the birth via DNA testing who the natural father is. I hope for your sake that its your fiance's baby hun. Personally id have to be honest I couldn't live for the rest of my life wondering who fathered my child.
    Sorry if this hasn't helped much
    Take care xxx
    lfsxthnudie's Avatar
    lfsxthnudie Posts: 26, Reputation: -2
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    #13

    Apr 30, 2007, 10:02 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by worried mom of 2
    I'm a mother of 2 small kids, me and my feince have been trying to have a third child. On March 17 at about 2:00AM I had sex with another man. He pulled out, and I was very worried about that because I know that just doesnt work. I took a preg. test on March18th was negitive, another on the 21st- positive and another on the 25th- positive. Everything I've read has told me that you can't tell untill 12- 15 days after sex if you are pregnant. Would I be safe to say that the chances of me being pregnant by this other guy are slim to none, and that my fience and I concieved a month earlier? Before March 16th- it was about 3 weeks when we last had sex. I've been feeling terrible, and very tired, and my breasts are tender. but I'm curious as to why the first test came negitive if that was the case. It has been only 10 days since my mistake and am hoping and praying that we concieved earlier. Can you tell me which senario is more likely?
    First the answer to your question- count 14 days from your last period, and that is the time you should have been ovulating/ most likely to get pregnant.

    Now my rant- why are you trying to get pregnant if you're not married yet, for one, and why are you even THINKING of having more children and getting married if you're sleeping around? My God woman, close your legs and get some morals before you bring more kids into your obviously misguided world.
    calee88's Avatar
    calee88 Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    Aug 10, 2007, 02:11 PM
    I really do wish you the best of luck. No cheating is right. I understand you feel really bad for it. And that's good that you feel bad because that means that you will never do something like that again. But also and Im not being mean, If your soon to be husband loved you at all he would stay with you no matter what happened. I don't think you have anything to be worried about with him not being the father. But I do think you need to tell him because he can go on the internet and read this stuff that you have put on here. But I do really wish you the best of luck and I don't want you to get mad for me writing this eather. But if he knows your email address all he has to do is go to Google and put in you email name and I will pull up all the web sites and post that you have been to. For example: Go to Google and put (peacegirl88) then hit search and It will pull up everywhere I have put a post and everything. So that's something to think about... GOOD LUCK and GOD BLESS YOU

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