My daughter is way past 40 and still she blames me for her past. She is married 14 yrs, and has a wonderful husband who makes a ton of money, two healthy children and forgets the good things between her and I. What do I do? The children are distant, so I do not send gifts or money to them. I have developed emotional health issues over this.

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Originally Posted by SheilaM14

My daughter is way past 40 and still she blames me for her past.

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Sometimes emotional scars run very deep. What blame is she placing on you?

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Originally Posted by SheilaM14

She is married 14 yrs, and has a wonderful husband who makes a ton of money, two healthy children and forgets the good things between her and I. What do I do? The children are distant, so I do not send gifts or money to them. I have developed emotional health issues over this.

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Well, if the children are distant, it doesn't mean that Grandma can't at least send them a card for their birthdays & holidays.?

So, your daughter has a great marriage and her husband is a good provider. Maybe she has forgotten "the good things between" the two of you because for her, the bad outweighs the good?

What have you done to attempt to reconcile with your daughter?

What is it that she blames you for?

She seems to have a happy life? Maybe she just an ingrate?

We really need some additional details.

What exactly is she blaming you for?

Do you see your daughter and grandchildren?

Our situations sound similar. I know that you sent this a yr ago August, & I pray that things are better between you & your daughter. Am going through the same thing w/my daughter now. Finally got fed up w/her being distant & blaming me for her past. I did the best I could do at the time. What it boils down to, is my mother & I had a very close relationship & I thought my daughter (38 yrs old nxt mo.) & I would have the same. I guess it is hard for me to accept that she's a very different person & that I probably will never have the same relationship as I did with my mother. My question: Did you have a close relationship w/your mom & expect the same from your daughter? If so, I truly understand your heart - I wish I could alleviate your pain. There are other spiritual aspects that I'm dealing w/as well w/her which directly come into play. In any event, I sympathize w/you & wish you the best towards resolution. Many blessings to you & yours.