Originally Posted by abbalover
Hi everybody. I think I have a problem but to be honest I'm not even sure it should be something to be worried about! I think I'm turning into a man!!
I am a 20 year old female student from the UK. I am straight and I have lots of friends of both sexes from all corners of the earth. I am not seeing anyone right now...(I was dumped by my boyfriend of 2 years a couple of months ago, he found a new girl, cheated on me with her).
My self-esteem/confidence has taken a bit of a thrashing, and recently I have begun to question myself a little. I am tall and slender with a natural athletic build. I am pretty flat-chested (32B) and I have quite a low (husky) voice. I always wear jeans and tshirts/baggy sweaters with old, battered trainers. I don't wear much make-up as I am extremely pale and any form of makeup seems to look worse on me. My shins and arms always have bruises and scrapes on them because I am so clumsy.
Personality-wise, I am smart, and I am honest, to the point of being blunt. I am easy to talk to and I try to solve things practically using logic. I am always the matchmaker, but never the one being matched. I have a very high sex drive, and I always enjoyed sex with my boyfriend (he was my first). I have a filthy sense of humour and I litter my conversations with swear words and slang (with the right people). I enjoy talking about books, computer games, music and life in general with people, and my habits (unfortunately) include constantly sniffling, biting my nails and chewing the skin on my lips.
Before the break-up I hardly noticed these things. My ex dumped me for a very girly girl however and my world has fallen apart. The comparisons don't seem to stop. She almost falls over the guys who flock round her, whereas I just fall over. She wear little skirts with cute tights and boots, has rosy skin, beautiful eyes and a girly giggle. I wear scruffy jeans, men's socks, worn-out trainers, I have too much eyebrow hair and sometimes I oink when I laugh. Honestly.
I always knew it wasn't my looks that he fell for, it was my personality (although he told me differently), but I feel that this is a wake-up call to change myself a just a little. I am a really masculine girl, a real tomboy, and I get the idea that men do not want tomboys, they want nice, soft, squidgy, girly girls to cuddle up to sometimes...
Although I am not actively seeking a boyfriend, and I certainly do not want my ex back in my life, I suddenly feel that all of the nice guys are passing me by because I look so rough! I would never undergo anything drastic, but my mother has even been commenting on how a little fake tan and a few skirts wouldn't go amiss. It's like a horror film.
So, should I try to scrub up a little better, or should I stay the way I am?? I am so confused!!