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-   -   Woman woes (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=143589)

  • Oct 22, 2007, 11:30 AM
    jeffatl
    Woman woes
    I'm not sure what the deal is guys, but I can't seem to find a girl these days. I have been single for the better part of 2 years now, and haven't had sex in about 6 months. I either find myself going nowhere with a girl, or just can't find one I want to date. Am I looking to hard, or am I just being too picky? I have always liked being "selective" and would rather wait for a girlt hat really intrests me on more than just a physical level, but man... this is getting frustrating. I have never had a problem getting dates before, but I'm just not meeting anyone anymore. The girl I am currently "dating" more like "barely seeing" just isn't making any effort what so-ever so I think that is pretty much done with. She is a VERY busy girl right now, but I need some sort of interest shown if I am going to go any further. I am still in school, so there are PLENTY of girls, I just can't get things moving in my head with any of them. Honestly, it's kind of because of the girl I am hanging out with, but she is so unavailable it's a lost cause. I more so find myself going for the wrong girls, and need to break this habit... but right now... just about anything would be nice. Any ideas?
  • Oct 22, 2007, 12:07 PM
    BiWiccanAndProud
    Well I say the same thing I tell most people on how to find a good person. Go to places that interest you or local events that interest you. If you see a girl you know say casually "Hey arn't you (name) from my (name of class)?" Or if you see a girl you kind of like in class who is having trouble offer to help and if need be offer to tutor! Now here is what you don't look for! Any girl who wears as much or less clothes then your average stripper... do not go for! I know it seems obvious and you may know that but I'm just saying cause I know plenty of guys who don't realize this >.<. If she seems money hungry she probably is... run fast! If she has dated more guys in the last year then the number of problems Britney Spears has... stay away!

    But back on the good things. If you find a girl you think you like... notice little things and use them for topic of conversation. As for your girl you have now if you can't find time for each other (or she doesn't have time for you what ever) the break it off with her. Gently say you just aren't feeling the relationship and you need something a little more then what you're getting from her... or you could just be blunt and say she's to damn busy XD which ever approach you perfer...

    And my last bit of advice... no matter how hot she is... and no matter how long it's been since you had sex... wait AT LEAST a month or two before having sex. It's a lot better for a relationship.
  • Oct 22, 2007, 10:38 PM
    jeffatl
    I agree with you on the sex issue... totally, that's why I was trying to wait things out.

    She actually called me toady and we talked for a bit, and I just plain asked her "have you been avoiding me for some reason? I get the feeling that you have been hinting to me you arn't interested". She said no, and "sorry if it came off that way, I just have alot going on".

    I'm still kind of put off, but I think maybe she just can't give me what I'm looking for right now. The problem is'nt meeting girls, it's finding a good one. I guess I can try going out to some event or what not, but I don't want to "prowel" for women. Who knows...
  • Oct 23, 2007, 05:31 AM
    BiWiccanAndProud
    Well if your girlfriend can't give you what you want then break it off. When ever I feel a relationship is too much for me or I don't think it's work I break it off. But yes try going to local events that interest you; book signings, carnavels, haunted houses (it is almost halloween after all). And don't stress finding a girl too much, you seem like a nice guy, you'll get one ^.~
  • Oct 23, 2007, 11:08 AM
    jeffatl
    Yea, I am a nice guy... and I think that may be part of the problem.
  • Oct 23, 2007, 11:21 AM
    BiWiccanAndProud
    oh being a nice guy isn't so bad. My boyfriend's a nice guy and though I am only his second girlfriend we are a very happy couple. You'll find someone don't worry! Nice guys may finish last is the saying right? Well think of it this way... by the time all the s get a girl all the sluts and es will have been picked out and all the good girls are left behind for the nice guys ^.~ get what I mean?

    My boyfriend is a nice guy and I'm only his second girlfriend (he's 19), but he tells me everyday that he's never been happier and that I'm the best thing that's ever happened to him.
  • Oct 23, 2007, 02:27 PM
    mogoverthemoon
    Think you've got it tough, I've been without a girlfriend for 20yrs! Lol.
    Most girls are the same when you get down to it so don't be as picy.
    I used to be of those 'nice guys' by the way but just lately I've changed and become one of those guys I used to dislike, got more attention of girls though so I'm not complaining!
    Going to places with your mates and 'not' trying to geta girl is a good start, look up flirting tips on Google, I did and they are good.

    Good luck mate
  • Oct 23, 2007, 02:49 PM
    FrOsT_bItE
    I think you are trying to hard. Yous hould enjoy life being single.
  • Oct 23, 2007, 06:04 PM
    jeffatl
    I think you hit the nail on the head actually Frost...
  • Oct 24, 2007, 01:30 AM
    jasmine_rezzag
    The same problem happens to me, I am not interested in any guys around me! Just no feeling, but I think maybe it does not matter, whatever I wait, maybe someone will be there some day, but recently I known a guy, and it seems we like each other very much, he is a very nice man, but the problem is he is Algerian, and I am Chinese. He promises he will come to china in next summer, no matter he comes or not, I believe him! I believe everything will happen at the right place at the right time, what we have to do just be patient and enjoy life!
    By the way, he is still a college student, younger than me!

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